How do you handle compliments?
By cherry_pig
@cherry_pig (118)
United States
May 30, 2007 12:28pm CST
I try to remember to say thank you, but more often than not I find myself denying the giver or downplaying it. For instance if they say, "Oh you look beautiful today" My first reaction is, "Oh no, I don't." or "But my hair is a mess.." I know I should just accept the compliment gracefully by saying thank you, but for some reason I always feel undeserving.
So how do react?
1 person likes this
10 responses
@sunshine4 (8703)
• United States
30 May 07
I think that your reaction to a compliment is very common especially among woman. I am like you~ they say cute shoes and I say, oh, they are old. I always have to take a breath and remember just to accept a compliment:)
@sunshine4 (8703)
• United States
30 May 07
I actually took a workshop on this subject before. It was said that woman are more likely to downplay a compliment. We had to practice recieving compliments during this workshop.
@cherry_pig (118)
• United States
30 May 07
But I wonder why it is common with us? Why are we so quick to deny or downplay?
@wolfie34 (26771)
• United Kingdom
25 Jun 07
I actually find compliments hard to accept, sounds silly I know but I guess it's to do with my low self esteem that I soak up negative comments and shrug off the positive ones, if someone says hey you've lost weight I will nod, but if someone says I'm ugly I will dwell on that more, I just can't break out of it.
@cherry_pig (118)
• United States
26 Jun 07
I think many of us have that same behavior in common. And they say it takes 10 positives to erase a negative. :(
@Dolcerina (3376)
• Hungary
30 May 07
I often accept the compliments. But sometimes when I feel that the compliments are not honest at all, I pretend not hear it.
Yesterday one of my new neighbours kept asking me disturbingly, then he wanted to invite me some "herbalife" meeting, and when I refused him, and said good-bye he said "your eyes are beautiful"
brrrrr!
I did not reply anything of course.
@cherry_pig (118)
• United States
30 May 07
Yeah, the ones that are not sincere are the worst as are the ones by dirty old men. :)
@ParaTed2k (22940)
• Sheboygan, Wisconsin
1 Jun 07
We don't accept compliments well because we are taught to only notice the good in others, but not ourselves.
@cherry_pig (118)
• United States
1 Jun 07
Exactly! We are taught to be modest while building others up.
@paradise12 (938)
• India
21 Jun 07
I say thank you when somebody compliments me and i like it...But i feel embarrased when somebody compliments it when i don't deserve it and i just smile and change the topic....
@cherry_pig (118)
• United States
21 Jun 07
But sometimes I wonder, who are we to judge if we deserve it or not? The hairstyle/shirt/smile we don't like on ourselves, others may find attractive.
I do hate insincere compliments though. Especially those in which a person is just trying to suck-up!
@hora_fugit (5862)
• India
30 May 07
I feel much shy and just make confused gestures (later being much ashamed..). All I get to do is give a smile at most. But recently I have been teaching myself to say :thanks:
@cherry_pig (118)
• United States
30 May 07
Yeah, that is the best way. But for some reason it is hard for me to do that most of the time.
@cecillecarmela (3818)
• Philippines
30 May 07
You should know your positive sides first so you should know how to figure out real and false compliments :D
@cecillecarmela (3818)
• Philippines
30 May 07
i appreciate compliments by humbling myself to say "Thank You" but sometimes i feel gushy when compliments are repeated :D
