Which one will you choose? The one you love, or the one loves you?
By jessicafri
@jessicafri (30)
China
October 30, 2007 2:22am CST
My friend will marry, but the person she will marry with is not the one she loves. The one she loves is not in her side. He is studying in another country. At this time, another man appeares, and treat her very good. He loves her very much, and says to her that he can waits for her till she agree to marry him. If the thing happens to you, what will you do?
8 responses
@jessicafri (30)
• China
1 Nov 07
Love itself is not fair. There will always be such a situation: One pays more than the other, but he or she can't get the corresponding return. If you choose the one you loves, it means that you will be the one who pays more but unhappy.
@jessicafri (30)
• China
1 Nov 07
Maybe you are right. But there are few people can only pay out without requesting the repayment. It's very painful that the man you loves doesn't love you.
@littlemissdaisies (52)
•
30 Oct 07
I think definitely the one she loves - love is so important in a relationship!
Although, they do say that you can grow to love someone - does she have a very good relationship with the one who loves her and common interests and ideals?
@jessicafri (30)
• China
1 Nov 07
Love is very important, and it's very pure. But it doesn't mean that love can solve all the problems in our real-life. It is these realities make us to face the choice of love.
@dreamy1 (3811)
• United States
30 Oct 07
Does the one she loves love her back? If so I would wait for him. It's not fair to the other person if she does not have the same feelings for him. Just because he treats her nice is not a good reason to marry someone. This other person deserves to be with someone who also loves him. He has to realize she doesn't love him and go find someone who will. He will be much happier.
@jessicafri (30)
• China
31 Oct 07
Yes, the man she loves also loves her. But the problem between them is the distance. And if my friend wait for him, that will be three years. No body know what will happen after three years. For women, time is very valuable. That's also a problem.
@wasons (302)
• China
30 Oct 07
hello jessicafri !
i also have the problem about that,my present girl friend isn't i love the most,but she loves me very much,as the time goes on,i would have to make a choice about the relationship.i really don't know how to deal with it.
not long before,i had made a survey about "who would you choose,the one you love or the one loves you" as a result,many people choose the one loves you.
@jessicafri (30)
• China
1 Nov 07
Do men also have the problem? OK, since you mentioned this problem, we have to talk baout it. I think men and women are different on dealing with the issue. Most men tend to marry with the one they loves, because it will make them feel the future life is full of hope. Women are easily moved, but men are not. So, even if you marry with a woman who don't love you so much, you will still be very happy if you spand more time on culturing feeling with her. Men enjoy the process of seeking women.
@kwenge (2487)
• Kenya
30 Oct 07
If the one she loves does not love her or does not even know whether she exists then I think she should marry a man who truely love her and from there she will learn to love him back. Love grows everytime you are together.
@jessicafri (30)
• China
1 Nov 07
Many people believe that feelings can be cultured slowly. It seems that you are one of them. But if the one you loves also loves you, what would you do?
@irene_27 (542)
• Philippines
30 Oct 07
Tough question. I haven't been in this situation before but i have friends who were once in both predicament. The first one chose the one she loves. She was so in love she married him despite his quick temper. Now, she's a battered wife and the guy turned out to be irresponsible. The other one married the person who she didn't love at all but seemed to love her so much. Now, after 2 kids she said she has learned to love the guy because she was treated like a princess.
@jessicafri (30)
• China
1 Nov 07
Most of my friends think that marrying with the man loves her will be happy. Your two friends' experience proved that my friends' thinkings are correct.
@MGjhaud (23246)
• Philippines
7 Nov 07
That one that loves me of course, that’s an easy way to say I know but so hard to do right? But hey, how am I supposed to live my life loving someone that doesn’t love me back. Love can be learned so I guess it’s not that hard to teach myself to let go the person I love that doesn’t love me back.
@dpk262006 (58675)
• Delhi, India
1 Nov 07
Difficult question. I will choose the one who loves me, not the one who I love. Because the one who loves me...will be a great well-wisher of mine.
