Using children as weapons in divorce

Thats a topic that gave me many things to think about.I was kinda shocked of what i read, are there parents who would terrify this way a kid only to live with him/her?But why?If you dont love your kid, and have him/her believe things taht arent true, make him/her feel fear for everything around, why would you like to live with him/her?It doesnt make sense!I havent ever met a condition like that you mention.

i think it is really stupid deed.in my opinion,whether couple love each other or not,on no accounts should they use their kids as weapons to attack each other.i know some parents who do not love each other any more,but still live together cuz they do not want their kids being hurted.of course i don't think their sacrifice is worthy,but we should try to let our kids not hurted and have a happy childhood as best as we can.

I think that doing something like that to your child is absolutely horrible. I don't know of any parents doing that exact thing that you mentioned, but I do know of other situations where parents use their children to get what they want. My mother-in-law used my sister-in-law (who was 7 at the time) to try and get my husband to move back home. She told his sister that he hated her and was leaving her and put her on the phone to cry to him. It was horrible! And that's not the only incident, either. I would definately say something if I saw parents doing something like that to their child or children. Someone has to stand up for the children in this world, but unfortunately, many people don't.

Those kind of parents are shameless parents. They are acting like children. They should be ashamed of themselves. They are already grown ups.

Yes unfortunately i have seen this happen. And its very sad that parents even think of doing this. I dont care how upset or angry i was at my husband there is no way i could put my child in the middle. Im sure this happens more then we think. Hopefully that poor little girl made it through such a hard time.

yes, it happens alot but usually not to that degree. divorce is so highly emotional that it is very easy to let angry thoughts about the other parent slip out with out realizing that little ears are tuned in. They don't really mean to hurt the child. Most parents get over this and find a way to get along and work together for the sake of the child. My divorce was very nasty and my daughter was very upset at nasty words we exchanged about each other even tho we did not say anything to her directly....just caught up in our own emotions. I felt terrible and so did he. We agreed to be more aware of what we said even if she was in another room and appeared to be occupied. Tonite he stopped by to give her some xmas $ and surprised me when he gave me a big hug and wished me a happy holiday. The smile that put on her face was the best gift i know i'll get for xmas this year. What you describe is downright abuse!

I have been a pre-school teacher. But fortunately, I've never had to go through this kind of a situation with any of my children. But if it happened to any one of my kids, I definitely would have called the parents for a meeting and spoken to them about it. Don't they realize how it is affecting the poor child? Are they not concerned about the child and only thinking about themselves? Some people are so selfish...they don't think about their own kids!! I have a cousin whose husband does that (they live separately) and I called up the man and gave him a earful!

I really pray to God to give sense to some parents at least they can think better of the child at least if not each other. Definately I would talk to such parents will make them realise that at least they can be good to their child. Divorces really leave scar on children and affects them badly.

I would probably call the children's health care and report this. This is not OK, this is what I see a way of child abuse. I am divorced, and my most important thing during the divorce was to make shore the kids were alright. I never have told them any nasty things about their father. The kids still need both their parents even if they divorce them self. It is very important. So if the adult here can not treat them self as adult, they should have a wake up cal.

that's really tragic. I think this poor girl is going to grow up totally maladjusted. And these parents obviously don't care for her mental well-being. If they are fighting for custody, then they should really act for her benefit and not scare her like this. I'm not sure how much you can get through to the parents on this since they seem to be preoccupied with hurting each other anyway. All the best.

it wouldnt be nice if you would tell them to stop what they're doing because you dont have any right to tell them what to do with their daughter, its none of your business. But you could always advice them to go under counseling. that might help

I had to go threw this growing up and I really wish some one would have stepped in and done something. If I saw this going on I would so talk to the parents. Maybe they do it to block the hurt but it's not ok what ever their "reasons" are. Kids don't have the choices that parents do. And it's not right that this poor child is in the middle of ths nasty divorce.