What the hell happened here?

I feel like you, i mean i could see myself in you. I started family so early.. when i was in college i have high hopes for arts and crafts and everything, but when family came, it was about them, the kids, cooking and finding work, keep the income coming in, until lately when i know i need something to fill that void i feel and somehow i know i need that passion again. That is why i am doing arts again because i do not want to reach such age where i know i will regret not doing anything. so go continue dancing my friend.

I can see the degree of feelings you have expressed. Change is the essence of life. When you were in teenage you liked certain things, you talked to your friends, -- that is no longer relevant for you and more so after marriage and that too after becoming MOTHER. Yes yesterday you would have been happy in being a mother of your children--on the event of Mothers' Day. Now is the time when you make your children do arts, dance, music and enjoy. Not that you should not do these things now. You are doing many things now -- cooking, taking care of kids (2/3), taking care of husband, sleeping. Now and then you will be watching television also. You can exploit your skills again once you children are capable of managing themselves-- you cna take up arts, music. I am not adding dance -- that depends on your physical ability--in case one becomes fat she may find it difficult. best wishes

I think you described me perfectly in this discussion! It's crazy, though, because it's not like once I got married (almost three years ago now) I could no longer do all those things I used to do. I can still do them, but now that I'm married, I have a house, a husband, and two dogs to care for now...among other things. My priorities have just changed a bit. It's not that I'm not happy. It's not that I've really changed that much. I get fulfillment out of caring for the hubby and taking care of my home. However, I - like you - would love to get back into some of those things I used to do. I used to write a lot more, and myLot has definitely helped me get back into that! I also did a lot of painting (acrylic and oil) in high school, which I really enjoyed. I don't know that I have the materials for it, but it would be worth looking into. I also used to play the piano and saxophone. I loved that. I don't own a piano, but I have a really nice keyboard that I could set up and practice on. I used to scrapbook and put together photo albums, but that's come to a complete halt. There are many other things I'd love to get caught up on. It's discouraging that I don't do those things I used to, but this discussion is a great encouragement because I now know that I'm not the only one. Don't get me wrong - it's not that I dropped all my dreams, goals, and hopes to get married. Marriage was a dream of mine that was fulfilled. I just need to add some priorities to not loose touch of those things I used to do. Thanks for the excellent reminder! Great discussion!!

Why should anyone tell you you used to do so much? You decided to quit with it and it's normal other people think it was your free decion to do so, or perhaps you have done it long enough and it's time for something new? Fact is: women mostly give up their life, men seldom do.

That's the spirit mansha. I am happy that you are now ready to do the things you love to do. I am sure that eventually yo will be able to rediscover yourself and have fun doing things again. You deserve to be happy in all the things that you do. Keep it up.

yeah that's true friend. in girl's life before marriage and after marriage is entirely different. whatever it is but taking care of child is the best of everything in your life na ? that will give enormous happiness to every mom. All girls are forget their personal enjoyment and taking care of others after marriage that is mother's specialty don't worry. If you want to do other things like dancing arts etc., then wait for some time till your child goes to school. when your child is in school you have lot of time to do other interesting activities.

A family and a marriage often take a toll on personal goals and life. There are a lot of demands and we get so tired we just don't pursue our one time interests. But still you should take me time even if it is an hour a day to paint or draw or like me I write and also love doing photography of nature. I also love to dance. Often we get wore out with demands of family children needing our attention and husbands too and there is obilgations socially we can lose ourself. Set down with your family and tell them how you feel and what you need. Not sure how old your children are but if old enough they might even want to share some of your interests too. They should encourage you. Don't try and do everything pick the one you most want to do first and move on from there. Take some classes or something. If you try and do everything you once gave up all at once it could create other problems so do one then ease into another in a little while. As to relatives outside the hubby and children. You may have to tell them Not this time or no some can get pretty snarly and demanding but they do not own you and you do not have to cave into them. Hubby and kids however should not suffer or put on a back burner either it can cause marital problems and neglect of the children. You need to do a balancing act. So cut back on some social things with relatives and prepare a few meals easy to fix ahead for hubby, ask him for a night off, to go take a dance or art class or maybe he will take a dance class with you and give you some time with him, If kids are young find a sitter maybe one of those relatives. Then go do something you love and miss.

I completely understand what you are saying. When we get married and start to raise a family it takes the majority of our time. I'm often amazed at how little time I have left to do things for myself. I'm so glad that you have decided to start doing all the things that you love again. That really is a great realization that you have come too. I often think how much I would like to do a lot of the things that I use too and to develop new hobbies. I'm working on that. As my husband does a lot of the things he wants to do. He regularly works out for two hours a night about four times a week, plays video games, and does pretty much whatever since he knows that I will take care of everything else. But I'm hoping to have some adjustments made to this as I do agree with you we need time for ourselves.

Umh, you maybe too busy and you have no time for your hobby. it is not good also. better you should arrange your time and join more activities outside. You can go dance, meet friends every week...as long as you still spend time to care your family. I think you will do good.

That's one bad thing about marriage, it changes you and let you forget about what you're doing back when you're single. Try to budget your time. Time management is the key. I'm sure you're not that always busy. My mom and dad are working and the love what they do. Maybe you can take your hobby as a job, you can teach other people how to dance or in music. It's up to you, it's your decision. Besides, Marriage is not the end of everything, it's just a new beginning. Try to adapt (^^,)