First marriage

@mom210 (9041)
United States
September 26, 2020 3:24pm CST
This week my oldest son will be getting married. I am so happy for him, but so sad for me. He was the first one that moved out and now the first one married. He is only 5 minutes away right now and I think I have gotten spoiled. He will be 3 hours away now and it seems so far away. My heart is so heavy, I am working really hard at being strong but I am afraid I will cry at his wedding. I don't want to embarrass them or me, or look at future pictures where I have a red crying face at the wedding. She is a wonderful girl and they make a great couple, I guess I am just having trouble saying goodbye to my little boy and hello to the married man. To make things a little tougher, my #3 son will be marring his girlfriend of 5 years in December, fortunately they will only be 5 minutes away. She is also a great girl and they also make a great couple. Guess I am just looking for some words of wisdom from Mom's or Dad's that have gone through this adjustment. Thank you
13 people like this
12 responses
@MALUSE (69388)
• Germany
26 Sep 20
You shouldn't think of losing your sons but of getting nice daughters-in-law!
5 people like this
@mom210 (9041)
• United States
23 Oct 20
I am going to work hard on thinking of it that way, I do hope we can get along well.
2 people like this
@DianneN (247204)
• United States
27 Sep 20
I cried at each of my sons' weddings. The rick is to have someone blow in your eyes. Congratulations. Weddings mean love and grandchildren.. Can't beat that. One son lives less than 1 1/2 hours away and the other 1.8 miles away.
3 people like this
@mom210 (9041)
• United States
17 Oct 20
I guess I am just a bit sad that it is truly the end of his childhood, no going back now.
2 people like this
@DianneN (247204)
• United States
17 Oct 20
@mom210 No, but you will have many amazing things coming in the future!!!!
1 person likes this
@LadyDuck (462856)
• Switzerland
27 Sep 20
Three hours is not so far and you can talk to him every day if you like. Try not to cry, the wedding day, should be a happy day.
2 people like this
@LadyDuck (462856)
• Switzerland
19 Oct 20
@mom210 Two years after I got married, with my husband we moved to another country and we were a little more than 4 hours from my Mom. I called her every day and we visited every month.
2 people like this
@mom210 (9041)
• United States
23 Oct 20
@LadyDuck I think mother daughter relationships are so tricky. I worried when I had my first daughter after having four boys, I was terrified I could not be close to her since my own mother/daughter relationship has been difficult over the years. But my mother and I have grown closer as we age and my daughter and I are close, I hope it can stay that way.
2 people like this
@mom210 (9041)
• United States
18 Oct 20
My head knows it isn't that far, my heart says oh my goodness.... three hours though. I will just have to get used to the idea and work it out between my heart and my head.
2 people like this
@just4him (311055)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
9 Nov 20
Congratulations to the newlyweds. I know it's an adjustment. What I would say is think about your marriage and how you felt on that day and know your son is feeling the same thing. It's a very happy day for them. I wish them all the best and for your other son too.
2 people like this
@mom210 (9041)
• United States
7 Jan 21
thank you, I am happy for them it is just a bit hard to say goodbye to the little boys they were. My biggest memory was being terrified I remember halfway down thinking "oh my gosh, what am I doing?" then I saw my future husband waiting for me and thought oh yes, there he is waiting for me
1 person likes this
@just4him (311055)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
7 Jan 21
@mom210 It's a huge commitment and I hope they will be happy.
1 person likes this
@mom210 (9041)
• United States
8 Jan 21
@just4him and I have told them over and over through out their lives, its forever and Forever is a really long time.
1 person likes this
@cintol (11261)
• United States
26 Sep 20
I cried when my first son got married too, its hard to let go of them when you have had them all your life but the best side is when you get your first grand child and you know thats a whole new life for you all to blend in. It won't be so bad, honest, your not losing a son, your gaining a daughter!!
2 people like this
@mom210 (9041)
• United States
23 Oct 20
I tears up when the pastor said man and wife, then did cry when I hugged him before he left. But I do not think he noticed, thankfully.
2 people like this
@cintol (11261)
• United States
26 Oct 20
@mom210 Awww, I bet he knew deep down.
1 person likes this
@paigea (36040)
• Canada
30 Sep 20
It certainly can be a moment to cry even though you are happy for them. Take care.
2 people like this
@mom210 (9041)
• United States
17 Oct 20
thank you, I was able to hold my tears until the end, so I didn't embarrass myself or them.
2 people like this
@paigea (36040)
• Canada
17 Oct 20
2 people like this
@jstory07 (134836)
• Roseburg, Oregon
28 Sep 20
Just stay in touch and you will be ok. How old are your twins now? Like me you still have kids living at home when the older ones left. Be happy for them .
2 people like this
@mom210 (9041)
• United States
17 Oct 20
it is so hard to believe they are 9, will be ten in January. I hope to keep them all in close relationships as some move out and others are still here.
2 people like this
@GreatMartin (23675)
• Ft. Lauderdale, Florida
15 Nov 20
And who will make you a grandmother first?!?!?
1 person likes this
@mom210 (9041)
• United States
7 Jan 21
the younger son that married a couple weeks ago, I am sure. He loves kids and so does she. They are more spontaneous and put less thought into things. The other two are older, go at things after thinking about them for a long time and are way more cautious.
• Midland, Michigan
3 Jan 21
If you did cry at the wedding it could be taken as tears of joy. How did you do?
1 person likes this
@mom210 (9041)
• United States
8 Jan 21
@MarshaMusselman I just didn't want to make them think I was unhappy or take away from their day at all.
1 person likes this
• Midland, Michigan
8 Jan 21
@mom210 years can also be of happiness.
1 person likes this
• Midland, Michigan
7 Jan 21
@mom210 I cried when my oldest daughter for married this past August. I don't remember whether I cried too when my younger daughter married two years ago or not.
1 person likes this
@Courtlynn (66933)
• United States
11 Nov 20
I wish him luck in his marriage. And it's okay to cry.
1 person likes this
@andriaperry (116860)
• Anniston, Alabama
27 Sep 20
Aww..... it`ll be okay.
2 people like this
@mom210 (9041)
• United States
18 Oct 20
yes it will, just will be a big adjustment for me.
1 person likes this
@thelme55 (76664)
• Germany
21 Dec 20
You can still see your sons through video chat. I hope you are doing fine.
1 person likes this
@mom210 (9041)
• United States
22 Dec 20
thank you, have a merry Christmas
1 person likes this
@thelme55 (76664)
• Germany
25 Dec 20
@mom210 Merry Christmas to you and your family, too.
1 person likes this