Do you listen to your body? Do you ever get down to just basics? What keeps you going?
By Marie Coyle
@MarieCoyle (36488)
April 29, 2024 12:21pm CST
This is often hard for me to do.
We all have our duties, responsibilities, and obligations. It's just part of life. Whether we are single or have a partner in life, children or no children, jobs, homes to care for, elderly or sick family...we have obligations and people we care about. I know that's just normal life for most of us.
I have always been one of those people who have what might be called too much determination to make it through a crisis, or a hard time, or just a tough patch of life. I realize that my attitude has helped to shape me into who I am today. I can't change that, nor would I want to. It's just part of the person I have come to be.
Last night, I realized I am just pushing myself too hard. I've been going until I can't go anymore, then resting, then a rinse and repeat thing. If not for my daughter and son in law, along with a friend who is aware of our situation, I think this last week or two I would have just screamed ''Uncle! OK, you got me!'' but thankfully, I did not do that, nor do I want to.
I realized I need to pay more attention to myself and my own needs--not necessarily wants, just needs. The basics, food and life's demands are enough to do for me, but then I have to allow myself more time to just...be me. I'm tired most of the time. My rest is often interrupted. I know the way to my son's treatments and appointments and such by heart, I think I could drive that path in my sleep...I have been trying to rest more. If I don't, I'm no good to myself or to anyone at all. I gave myself a stern talking-to!
I have come to learn to absolutely treasure the sweet moments. The text or call from a child or grandchild, that just says, I love you. The friend who comes over with an unexpected surprise of a food treat for my son that he loved, or the joy of him enjoying something simple, like a better day or knowing that we are all trying to get through all of this together. The hope alone carries me through many a hard circumstance.
The main thing for me, is don't forget the hope, the joy, and the love. It keeps me going.
What keeps you going?
10 people like this
8 responses
@sallypup (60708)
• Centralia, Washington
29 Apr
Yes please take time for yourself. I usually go to the pool and exercise on Mondays. Today I just can't; after DoorDash delivers food I may cave and go up and sleep. Too much pain. Chores need done but I am lightheaded with the need to rest. For sure I am not driving.
2 people like this
@MarieCoyle (36488)
•
29 Apr
I am so sorry you are in pain. I know how that can be. Please rest, I hope you feel better very soon, Lenore.
1 person likes this
@sallypup (60708)
• Centralia, Washington
29 Apr
@MarieCoyle Thank you. Silly me. I watched an unusual Mel Gibson movie! 'A Man without a Face.' Very sensitive, involving and sweet views of the Maine coast plus a house that I would love to prowl through.
1 person likes this
@MarieCoyle (36488)
•
30 Apr
@sallypup
Hopefully, it helped distract somewhat from the pain.
1 person likes this
@LindaOHio (176200)
• United States
30 Apr
I know you have a lot on your plate taking care of your son; but don't forget about you! You have to be healthy and strong to do what you do. Try to get some rest when you can and be sure to eat and hydrate. Try and have a good day.
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@MarieCoyle (36488)
•
30 Apr
I sleep whenever I get the chance to. I am trying very hard to keep on, keeping on. Thank you, Linda.
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@MarieCoyle (36488)
•
30 Apr
What a kind thing to say. Thank you so much. And yes, I am trying.
1 person likes this
@MarieCoyle (36488)
•
30 Apr
One of my grandmother's had horrible arthritis, it was so hard to see her in such pain. I'm sure sorry you suffer from it, Dena.
I think your list of what keeps you going is just spot on!!
1 person likes this
@kobesbuddy (78882)
• East Tawas, Michigan
29 Apr
Jay has a hard drive personality, he pushes himself too hard! Learning to accept oneself, just as God created us, is hard work! Especially when other people, insist on trying to change who I am! I want to LIKE who I am:)
1 person likes this
@MarieCoyle (36488)
•
30 Apr
I am not trying to change myself at least as far as my goals are. Just trying to be there for my son and my other children. Thank you, Kharla.
1 person likes this
@kobesbuddy (78882)
• East Tawas, Michigan
30 Apr
@MarieCoyle I do my best to focus on the Lord, he is my strength for each day:)
1 person likes this
@MarieCoyle (36488)
•
30 Apr
Until all of this went down, it was easy to do good self-care. Thank you.
1 person likes this
@grenery8 (9252)
• Zagreb, Croatia (Hrvatska)
2 May
@MarieCoyle i agree. if we haven't started yet, we still can. welcome!
1 person likes this
@kaylachan (68236)
• Daytona Beach, Florida
29 Apr
I have had to learnthe very same thing. Growing up I recieved mixed signals when it came to my disabilities. I was told I could do whatever I wanted (within reason), but torn down in the same breath in the form of being sheltered due to my mother's fears. When I was a teenager, she started to losen the strings a bit, and allowed me some freedoms. But, my sisters wanted to keep a firm hold of the leash and control me.
I often ignored my bodies needs during this time, ignoring when I was tired or sore or having a bad day. I tought myself not to feel.
Now as an adult, I realize doing that was toxic. That ignoring my body wouldn't do me any good. In listening to my body, I can better care for George and his needs. Make sure he listens to what his body is trying to tell him.I want him to want to live.
@MarieCoyle (36488)
•
30 Apr
You have had a lot to overcome. I think you are an amazingly strong woman, Kayla.
1 person likes this
@wolfgirl569 (105005)
• Marion, Ohio
29 Apr
Kids and pets. Please make sure you get chances to rest. That's the most important thing when taking care of someone else
1 person likes this