psychiatrist

DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM? It was the final examination for an introductory Biology course at the local university. Like many such freshman courses, it was designed to weed out new students, having over 500 students in the class! The examination was two hours long, and exam booklets were provided. The professor was very strict and told the class that any exam that was not on his desk in exactly two hours would not be accepted and the student would fail. Half of an hour into the exam, a student came rushing in and asked the professor for an exam booklet. "You're not going to have time to finish this," the professor stated sarcastically as he handed the student a booklet. "Yes I will," replied the student. He then took a seat and began writing. After two hours, the professor called for the exams, and the students filed up and handed them in. All except the late student, who continued writing. An hour later, the last student came up to the professor who was sitting at his desk preparing for his next class. He attempted to put his exam on the stack of exam booklets already there. "No you don't, I'm not going to accept that. It's late." The student looked incredulous and angry. "Do you know who I am?" "No, as a matter of fact I don't," replied the professor with an air of sarcasm in his voice. "Do you know who I am?" the student asked again in a louder voice. "No, and I don't care." replied the professor with an air of superiority. "Good," replied the student, who quickly lifted the stack of completed exams, stuffed his in the middle, and walked out of the room.

Waiter, what's the meaning of this fly in my tea-cup? I wouldn't know, sir. I'm a waiter, not a fortune-teller. Waiter, there's a beetle in my soup; send the manager here. That won't do any good, sir - he's frightened of them as well! Waiter, is this a lamb chop or a pork chop? Can't you tell by the taste? No, I can't Then what does it matter? Waiter, in future I'd like my soup without. Without what, sir? Without your thumb in it! Waiter, bring me a glass of milk and a Dover sole. Fillet? Yes, to the brim. Waiter, I'll pay my bill now. This $10 note is bad, sir. So was the meal. Waiter, there's a fly in my butter. No there isn't. I tell you there is a fly in my butter! And I tell you there isn't; it isn't a fly, it's a moth and it isn't butter, it's margarine - so there! Waiter, how long have you been here? Six months, sir. Ah, then, it can't be you who took my order. Waiter, I can't eat this! Why not sir? You haven't given me a knife and fork. Waiter, this lobster's only got one claw. I expect he's been in a fight, sir. Well, bring me the winner! Waiter, have you got frogs' legs? Certainly, sir. Then hop into the kitchen and get me a steak! Waiter, does the pianist play requests? Yes, sir. Then ask him to play tiddlywinks till I've finished my meal. Waiter, my bill please. How did you find your luncheon, sir? With a magnifying glass. Waiter, bring me a fried egg with finger-marks in it, some luke-warm greasy chips and a portion of watery cabbage. We don't do food like that, sir! You did yesterday..

hahahha great question what should be the answer.........