My boyfriend died last year. How do I cope?

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My boyfriend died last October in a motorcycle accident. We were in a long distance relationship. I am here in the Philippines and he works in a US airbase in Kuwait. He died in Kuwait and was buried in Arkansas. What pains me the most is that I wasn't able to attend his funeral. Until now, I still have crying fits. The lack of closure holds me back so much. What do I do? I've read so many books on dealing with grief but books just make me cry or gives me hope to move on but it wanes almost instantaneously. I need help...