When do you think it is the right age for children to start school?

@smartmom (826)
United States
April 18, 2007 11:07pm CST
I know that the age when children start school varies a lot from country to country, what is your in put. In Denmark, where I was born they start at age six, but in the US , where my son is born they start school at age five. My son is really right on the border between having to start at five or at six, and my husband and I disagree in this issue. I feel that he needs the extra year, and I do not want to rush him. My son is very eager to learn, and he is counting, writing and singing the alphabet, not always correctly, but he shows great interest in it, but am still unsure. We just moved back to the U.S., and he is finally beginning to build on his English again, and I am just afraid that the lack of langage skills will set him back both academically and in his interaction with the other kids. My son is also the shy, serious and observing type, and this is one of the major reasons, that I feel he needs to wait a year. As he is really on the line (6 days) from when they split between going to school at five or at six, I really think that it is our choice as his parents, and that we need to make the right choice. In his old day care, I remember that one of the girls, who had gone off to shcool, came back after about three months, and I relly felt bad for her, because none of her old friends were left at the daycare, and she had to completelly re-adjust. I once heard a saying "When in doubt, let the doubt come to the benefit of the child." What do you think? When is it the right age to send your child of to school? Even if you have doubts?
9 people like this
27 responses
@judyt00 (3497)
• Canada
19 Apr 07
Putting him into kindergarten will help with his social skills and his language. He will develop self assurance as he learns that HE can do many things that others can't. Putting him in a good kindergarten may be the best thing you do for him for years to come. And if his language doesn't develop as quickly as you'd like, you can always put him in again next year! 2 of my grandsons were born within days of the cut off date for our area. and they did just fine being the youngest and smallest kid in the class. Some of the other, older children actually tried to make sure they were getting things done as fast as they were themselves. The encouragement they felt was quite a boost for their little egos.
2 people like this
• United States
19 Apr 07
I completely agree with you about that. I can almost relate to this situation because here in Texas, we have Early head start from for children up to 3 yrs of age and I am debating whether or not I should enroll my 23 month old. I guess time will tell.
2 people like this
@smartmom (826)
• United States
19 Apr 07
My son was in daycare from he was 2 1/2 until he was 4 1/2 (three months ago). We recently moved and we are waiting to enroll him until August, when a new school year begins. We are discussing whether to send him to prekindergaten of kindergarten, so he will really get the social skills in both places, i just do not want him to have to repeat a year, so I prefer to be safe, while my husband thinks it is better to start early.
@sunita64 (6469)
• India
19 Apr 07
In our country children of age 3 go to schools but they are play school only and gradually after crossing lower nursery, upper nursery they reach to class 1 by that time the age is 5 years.
2 people like this
@smartmom (826)
• United States
19 Apr 07
Here in the U.S. , I believe that the kids start preschool at age 2 or 4 and prekindergarden at age 4 or 5.
@dfinster (3528)
• United States
19 Apr 07
My daughter was right at thecut off age too. She was also eager to learn and really wanted to go to school so we enrolled her at 5. She struggled a little for the first month or two and then she absolutely flourished. She's now in second grade and is an excellent student and loves going to school. I hope that she always has the love of learning that she does now. If your son wants to go I'd say, maybe give it a try.
1 person likes this
@smartmom (826)
• United States
20 Apr 07
Thank you for your response dfinster, you have defintely given me something to think about. I think I will contact the school on Monday, to see what their give and take is on the issue.
@ironstruck (2298)
• Canada
19 Apr 07
I think many people send their kids to school as early as possible so someone else can look after them for a while. Personally, I believe 6 years old is a good place to start. I don't believe there is any advantage in rushing them into a school. There are many thinks you can teach them at home and they can still play with other kids when not in school.
1 person likes this
@smartmom (826)
• United States
20 Apr 07
Thanks for your input ironstruck, these are certainly some of my viewpoints, and I am especially afraid of pushing him into growing up too soon.
• Philippines
19 Apr 07
I started school at the age of 4, since like your son, I was very eager to learn and my Mom has already taught me to count, write and read, so I guess, I'm more or less ready. I think I just turned out quite fine. Well, based on your son's quality, I think he's ready to enter schooling, the younger, the better. I mean, I used to be a teacher and it's easier to teach younger children because they're more eager to learn. Besides, I wouldn't want to disappoint a son who's really willing to go to school now, he might lose his enthusiasm the next year....
1 person likes this
@smartmom (826)
• United States
19 Apr 07
What you say really does make sense, and I really do think that he is ready to start school in some areas, but yhen there are other areas in which I do not think that he is ready.
• Philippines
19 Apr 07
I can really relate to this question. For some time now, my husband and I are debating on whether we should send my daughter to school this coming June or not. She's turning three this month and I believe it's never too early for kids to learn. I have started teaching her the alphabet from the day she was born. I have been reading her books even when she's still inside my womb. Sending her to school for me is just giving her another way to learn. Learn how to socialize with other kids, learn to share with others what she knows, and learn from her teachers too. But still, I believe that we should not push our children too hard. If she's not in the mood to go to school on a particular day, then don't force her.
1 person likes this
@smartmom (826)
• United States
19 Apr 07
I definitely agree about the importance about learning, and my focus has really been on teaching my son both of his languages, we have also been counting from early on, but I just started during this past year to teach him the letters, writing, and reading. I just do not want to push him too much, as I think a lot of kids are being pushed into growing up way too fast nowadays. Afterall, you will never be able to get your childhood back.
@JC1969 (1224)
• United States
19 Apr 07
I think pre-school between the age of 3 and 4 is appropriate for a child to start receiving school instructions outside the home. It can encourage social interactions and mannerisms to form, it can help a child learn to take direction from other adults that are not the parents. Let's face it, not ever parent has educational faculties that make them a quality person to encourage educational development, and with pre-school the child will have exposure to skills, and education that will build a well-balanced foundation for them to stem off of as they continue with education. Also, if there is a learning disability in a child, it is better if it is picked up early on so that the best course of education is pursued with the respect to the individual learning style of the child.
@smartmom (826)
• United States
19 Apr 07
I think you are completely right about this, and he has been in daycarefrom about 9-10 a.m. until 1-3 p.m., but since he is starting of in an entirely new place, with no friends, I am leaning towards putting him into pre-K instead of kindergarden, but my husband and I disagree on this point.
@fidainc (410)
• Singapore
19 Apr 07
I started when i was 4 years old in Kindergarten for 2 years before I am eligible to join the primary school Nowadays not only they started in nursery but even at 2 years old they have this thing called the Playgroup. I think its just the world's way of taking advantage of modern parents working 9 to 5 and sucking our hard earn money 'nurturing' our children at such a young age.
@kaka135 (14931)
• Malaysia
19 Apr 07
Do you refer to the elementary school that is compulsory set by the government? In my country, Malaysia, the kids are required to start the elementary school at age 7. As for kindergarten or daycare, there's no compulsory age. Personally, I think kids can start going to kindergarten at age 4 or perhaps going to daycare center before that. I went to kindergarten at age 4, and I was really happy in school. Going to school is not only for studying, but for learning communication skill, social skill, and other language skill. I did learn a lot from my kindergarten and till now I still can remember. I really appreciate for my kindergarten teachers, as they have given me a really good time there. If you are in doubt, why not ask your son directly? I still remember I was eager to go to school when I was young. So, your son may tell you whether he likes it or not.
@smartmom (826)
• United States
19 Apr 07
If I asked him, I am sure he would want to go to school, but I don't think he really understands that in school you have to sit down and pay attention :)
• India
19 Apr 07
I live in India and in my country, children are rushed to school at the age of 3 itself. At that age they dont know anything. They cant even say the cause of pain. It is also difficult for the teachers and parents to teach and guide them. I think the age of 5 correct for the children to go school. At 5, they may have understood the happenings around them to some extent. They can also learn quickly without any difficulty
1 person likes this
@smartmom (826)
• United States
19 Apr 07
Thank you for your comment. I completely agree that it is way to early to sens kids to school at age three. At that age their attention span is very limited, and I can understand why the teachrs are having problems.
@gemini1960 (1161)
• Philippines
19 Apr 07
i usually send my kids to school at the age of six but its a kindergarten type of school ..
1 person likes this
@smartmom (826)
• United States
19 Apr 07
I started kindergarten at age six, and I never had a problem with it, but nowadays there seems to be so much pressure.
@kelly60 (4547)
• United States
19 Apr 07
My children started preschool at 3 years old, and began kindergarten when they were 5 years old. My granddaughters have joined a playgroup program, which seems to be the step before preschool, at 2 years old. They seem to enjoy it, and it is helping them to overcome their shyness and get more accustomed to being around the other children.
@smartmom (826)
• United States
19 Apr 07
Yes, my son has also been in either fulltime or parttime daycare since he for about two years, which really has helped him a lot, but I never think that his shy and observant personality will change, as he has always been like this. What we are really discussing is whether to put him in prekindergarten or kindergarten. I feel that it is better to put him in pre-k, as this will give him some more time to adjust. If it had been my 13 month old son, I would probably send him to kindergarden, as he is very outgoing.
• Malaysia
19 Apr 07
i think it depends on individual speed of learning.. if your son can pick up very fast.. why not? you can send your son/daughter to school .. some people are born smarter. .while some are not.. this is a true fact.. in my country.. the age to start school is around 5 - 7.. but.. i think the earlier the better.. as soon as the interest is developed in your children.. you can always send them to school.. don't you think so? it's kind of sarcastic to follow the country rules at times.. you know why? because i've heard that education bring down many geniuses
1 person likes this
@smartmom (826)
• United States
19 Apr 07
You are right. This is actually why I am beginning to doubt my own side a bit, because my son is really beginning to be extremely curious and eager to learn.
• Philippines
19 Apr 07
at 3 yrs. I think is the best age for a child to get started at school,bec my two daughters get started when they 3 yrs. old,they learn how to minggle with other childrens,and at the age 4 they know how to read abc,know how to count, write their names and when they reach the age of 5 they know completely how to read and write long words,and they become more knowledgeable than other kid who just starting school at the age of five
1 person likes this
• United States
20 Apr 07
My daughter did not attend school until she was 6 years old, in the state of Texas kindergarden is not required and we were not living in a part of town that had a good school district so I kept her out a year, I am glad I did, she was more mature when she attended the first grade.
@Foxxee (3651)
• United States
19 Apr 07
Kids start Pre-K around 4, sometimes even 5. Pre-K is by choice, but Kindergarten is a must by the state law here in the US. A child has to be in Kindergarten by the age 5 or 6 here.
@steney (1418)
• Philippines
20 Apr 07
I sent my child to school when she was 4. I too, had the same thoughts as to when is the right age for a child to go to school. My daughter is very eager to learn at that time and I felt it will be a waste to just let her stay in the house and watch TV all day when she can be already taught the basics in preschool. My friends and other parents send their kids to school as early as 2 1/2, but that's more of a play school. Anyways, she did well in nursery that the following year (last year) she was accelerated to preparatory, skipping kindergarten. I felt proud of her for that achievement, but I felt I subjected her to academic pressure for letting her enroll as prep since they have more assignments in there and they are expected to spell, read and write well. She's good in spelling and reads fast too. But she writes slowly, probably because she's still young and her hands need to be practiced more for writing. When I spoke to her teacher about it, she was even surprised that my daughter is just 5 years old, because her classmates are ostly 7 year olds. She does well in everything except in writing and I feel bad pushing her to practice, practice and practice. I know it's late to take it back because she already graduated from prep and will be grade 1 this coming June at 5 years old.( I even don't know if she'll be accepted as they normally accept 7 years old for grade 1). But to let her feel like any normal 5 year old, I just let her be. She still likes playing a lot so I just make the most of my time with her and do fun activities while it's still vacation time. I've heard of children being tired of studying and losing interest in school because their parents pressure them to be the best in school. I don't want that to happen to her, so I let her experience fun whenever she can have it. Bottom line is, as a mother, you know what's best for your child, and when your child is ready for school. Some children need more time to be prepared, some can go early as 4. It really depends. Just make sure that the school will be a fun place for your child where he would want to come back again day after day. Maybe you should enroll him in a play school first, so he can get a feel of how school is going to be. From there, you can gauge if he is ready.
• United States
20 Apr 07
To be honest, I don't really think it matters whether school starts at 5 or 6. I started at 5, but I really wanted to learn. But, if you're worried about his language skills, the best place for him to relearn English is probably in school--where everyone speaks English. And, if you all don't speak English at home, an extra year at home won't help him pick up English. A problem you may encounter if you delay him a year is that he'll be bored.
@neerajm (110)
• India
20 Apr 07
I think at the age of 4 the child should enter to school.below the the age of 4 he or she is a babby.But as he complete 4 he is able to learn and has the capacity to remember the things which are been tought to him by his teachers or at home.He also starts a little of writting,poetry,stories etc.
@semak76 (187)
• United States
19 Apr 07
The great part about kindergarten, is the kids arent expected to know that much when they start. It is to teach them some basics and get them ready to start first grade. I'm not sure how this differs state to state, but here in Connecticut, I was told that it is mandatory for kids to start first grade at the age of 6, but going to kindergarten at 5 is optional. Before you decide to not send him to school, make sure he would be able to attend next year, and not get put into a class that will be ahead of him. Personnally, I would send him now, if he struggles, you'll know his problem areas and can work with him at home. At this age, one of the most important parts of starting school is the social skills he will learn.
@smartmom (826)
• United States
20 Apr 07
Thank you very much for your response. I am beginning to reconsider whether my choice of keeping him back a year is right or not, I think I will try to contact the school to see how their programs are.