How do you feel about smoking around your kids?
By cynddvs
@cynddvs (2948)
United States
April 20, 2007 6:16pm CST
This is a question for smokers and non smokers. I want everyones honest input on this. The reason I ask is because my fiance smokes off and on occasionally. He only smokes when he's really stressed out or depressed. Here lately he has been smoking. Now when I say he has been smoking he really doesn't smoke that often. A pack of cigarettes can last him over a week. And when he does smoke he smokes outside. I would never let him smoke inside or around our daughter. But last night it was cold outside and our daughter was asleep and I caught him smoking in the bathroom in our bedroom. He had the door closed and the fan on but the smoke still lingered out into the apartment. I got onto him and told him if he was going to smoke he had to do it outside. He apolgized and said he wouldn't do it again. But another thing that bothers me is after he smokes that smell is on his clothes and it bothers me when he holds our daughter smelling like that. I always make him wash his hands. Am I being to picky? Or do some of you feel the same way? And for the smokers out there how do you handle smoking and handling your kids? I won't judge you or anything like that I promise. I just want honest input on this.
10 people like this
31 responses
@dedicated_28 (1383)
• United States
21 Apr 07
I am a smoker and I do not smoke around my kids, not in the car or in the house and neither will anyone else. I think that it causes children to be more susceptable to catch colds, respiratory problems etc. I once questioned my doctor about the smell in the clothes and she said it isn't any more harmful than if you stood outside cooking on a grill and things like that. I would recommend hand washing just as you would with anything else.
3 people like this
@cynddvs (2948)
• United States
21 Apr 07
That's good that you don't smoke around your kids. I'm glad you take them into consideration. My mom smoked the whole time I was growing up and she always smoked in the house. It was so bad that our walls would turn that dingy yellow. I always hated it.
2 people like this
@dedicated_28 (1383)
• United States
10 Jul 07
I know exactly what u mean. My parent's are chain smokers and their house is that disgusting yellow color. Thanks for the best response^.^
@sunshine4 (8703)
• United States
21 Apr 07
I agree with you. I think it is terrible for adults to subject their children or any children to second hand smoke. It can be just as dangerous, or even more dangerous at smoking. I can't stand the smell of people who smoke. Many of them think that they don't smell, but if you are a non smoker, when a smoker is around you , the reak! I would be just like you. You only want to protect your child and there is nothing wrong with that.
@cynddvs (2948)
• United States
21 Apr 07
I agree that smokers don't realize how they smell. I know when I was bartending I didn't realize how bad I smelled until I got home and took a shower and did my laundry. When I would pick up my dirty clothes I couldn't believe how bad they reaked.
2 people like this
@addysmum (1225)
• Canada
21 Apr 07
Don't back down on this. Smoking around kids is very wrong. It hurts them, they can develop lung troubles, learning disabilities, growth troubles, pick up the habit themselves at an early age. My grandparents all smoked, my parents smoke, the only thing that saved my from doing it in school was I watched my grandfather die from lung cancer and it was scary.
3 people like this
@mrbranan (1012)
• United States
21 Apr 07
I wouldn't think so. You know more people die from second hand smoke that from smoking them selves. I would never allow it myself but if you want help with it get the information and show it to your boyfriend and explain that you are concerned about your daughters health.
3 people like this
@KissThis (3003)
• United States
21 Apr 07
I try not to allow any smoking around mt children. There are times that it is out of my control but when I can I don't allow it. When my daughter was born her doctor explained to me that a smoker would have to change their clothes as well as wash up before holding a baby for them not to get second hand smoke off of the smoker.
3 people like this
@sanyah1988 (306)
• United States
21 Apr 07
I never smoke around my kids at all because I have learned that for many years that has truly damaged the brain even when the child is outside you stomach
3 people like this
@samselvarajk (260)
• India
21 Apr 07
basically everyone in my family do not smoke.moreover my friends do not smoke.whereever i take my children i prefer non-smoking places.even in flights i take non smoking seats.not only in flihts even in restaurants and other places.so i have not had any problem with my children about smoking and etc...
2 people like this
@whiteheather39 (24403)
• United States
21 Apr 07
I would really like to respond but as I am a smoker I dont think you would like it very much.
1 person likes this
@cynddvs (2948)
• United States
21 Apr 07
I would really like to hear your response and I promise I wouldn't be disrepectful at all. Although I can't promise the same from other users. I would hope everyone could be respectful of each others opinions. If you don't feel comfortable responding here feel free to send me a message. I would really love to hear your input.
@lisado (1227)
• United States
21 Apr 07
My husband and I both don't smoke and we don't like the smell of it. The people that come to our house knows that we don't allow smoking in our home (not only due to asthma but also allergies and it just stinks) and anyone that comes over knows that. They are welcome to smoke outside, as long as they clean up their butts, but that still doesn't thrill me since they come in smelling of smoke. Generally they just smoke one on the way over and wait until they leave to smoke another.
However, if we are at someone else's house I won't ask them not to smoke in their own home. Our closer friends refrane from smoking when we come over, or they'll slip outside for a quicky because they know about our health and preferences. I just try to limit the time we're around the smoke to keep it to as bare of a minimum as possible. It's their right to smoke, especially in their own home, so I don't want to step on their toes. They make the options out of respect for us, which I appreciate.
1 person likes this
@cynddvs (2948)
• United States
21 Apr 07
I feel exactly the same way about going to peoples houses I know smoke. I would never tell someone they can't smoke in their own house. I think that would be just as rude as them coming into our house and lighting up. I normally just limit my time when I'm visiting because I know if they are not smoking it's only because I'm there with my daughter and they are trying to be courteous.
@mememama (3076)
• United States
21 Apr 07
My husband smokes, but only outside. I would kick him out of the house if I caught him smoking inside. He knows I think it's disguisting and we have a son. Someday he will have to explain to our son why he can't smoke but daddy can. I really hope that he quits before then, but he's been smoking since he was a child himself. He also has to wash his hands when he comes in the house. He also can't smoke in our car. I found ashes in our car and boy was I mad! I may sound like a total witch, but I told him if he does that again I'm taking away his keys. I also found a burn hole on the carpet of the car-ahhh!
2 people like this
@sacmom (14192)
• United States
22 Apr 07
No, you're not being too picky. It sounds like you don't want your daughter being exposed to any type of smoke, even the stuff that lingers on the clothing. Good for you! It's not fair for the kids to have to put up with second hand smoke, and I'm glad you tell your fiance to clean up if he smells like smoke.
BTW I am a non-smoker with kids, so I know how you feel. And I've done exactly as you've done. Only difference is, I caught my husband smoking 'in the bathroom' more than once when the kids and I were home, even after he apologized and said wouldn't do it again, the first time I caught him. I hope your fiance isn't like my husband and that he will keep his promise to you and your daughter. Good luck to you both.
1 person likes this
@nihad_aslani (59)
• United States
21 Apr 07
I am a smoker and my girlfriend is a non smoker. I don't smoke around my kids because second hand smoke is even worse than smoking themselves. I don't want to cut my childs life short because of something I did. It's good that he smokes outside instead of the house. I think you are very smart for standing up to him and not letting him smoke around your little girl. He can sit in the car and smoke if he is cold. That's what I do. I don't think you are too picky. You just want your daughter to be healthy. That's not too much to ask of anyone. I wash my hands and usually change my shirt before I go around my kids at least when they were younger. Now they are 16 and 17 years old and they live with their mother. So, I don't see them as often as I used to.
1 person likes this
@eyewitness (1575)
• Netherlands
21 Apr 07
I will never allow myself or my husband to smoke in front of th kids.As a matter of fact i did quit smoking so when i will have children it will not be hard for me not to smoke.I don't think it's healthy and you are not a good example for your children when you smoke in front of them.I know a lot of people who smoke in front of their children but their children are like not allowed to.But children start to think why not?If your husband smokes outside that should be fine with you.But please don't be bothered when he smells.I mean you don't say to someone who always smells sweaty please don't hug me because you smell like sweat.Just be glad that he respects the fact that you don't want him to smoke inside in front of the children.That's a positive thing
2 people like this
@7mfmns (103)
• United States
22 Apr 07
i don't smoke & i can't stand the smell of the smoke wafting it's way towards me. thank goodness most of my friends don't smoke so i haven't been around it much. if i will be in a situation where somebody will smoke near my baby i would just walk out of range with my baby and might not tell that person about how i hate that kind of smoke but body language will say it all for me...if he knows how to take a hint.
1 person likes this
@pendragon (3349)
• United States
21 Apr 07
I never put up with it, I wouldn't take her smoky places when she was a baby,and even now that she's 15 I still admonish anyone around her that would smoke.Why rob someone else especially and innocent child of good health?Why harness someone else with a terribe ailment that they put no effort into producing in themselves?
1 person likes this
@design (849)
• Ireland
21 Apr 07
I'm a smoker, I'd never smoke in either my own home or someone else's, even when they smoke. I tend to smoke only late into the evening so the kids are in bed, actually it's the first thing I do when they go to bed, smoke and read the paper.
Your not being hard, your doing the right thing, apart from the risk to your Daughters health and your own. I've had kids dropped at my house to play with my Daughters and the child reeks of smoke, It makes me sick to see adults smoke in cars with kids (I think our Government has/will be (very soon) making smoking in our own cars against the law here.(Ireland) We already have laws preventing people from smoking in our restaurants and pubs, Do you??
1 person likes this
@Calais (10893)
• Australia
21 Apr 07
Im a smoker, but I NEVER smoke near the kids, in the house or in the car. They are as far away as possible. I always wash my hands and spray myself with body spray after I have a smoke to go near the kids, because it stinks disgusting and I dont want them smelling it.
1 person likes this
@KarenO52 (2950)
• United States
21 Apr 07
Keeping your daughter safe from second hand smoke is showing good judgement on your part. You can never be too careful. I have a friend who smokes, and her husband does too. Their house stinks from smoke, and everytime I go over there I end up taking a shower when I get home. I was just thinking about that, and thinking about not going over there anymore, and then I thought about her young son, who was being exposed to that on a daily basis. I'm planning on telling her what I think about what she's doing, though I don't think it will do much good.
1 person likes this
@josyula (112)
• India
21 Apr 07
ya according to me wat you are doing is rite..ur husband also should realize dat his daughter would get spoiled if he smokes in front of her and its not good for her health also.
But its true dat they also get addictd to smoking and cant contorl them and some times it happens dat they smoke in home.