Mother Of Overweight Boy Says DSS Taking Temporary Custody Of Son
By meme0907
@meme0907 (3481)
United States
April 20, 2007 10:20pm CST
This story reported by my local cbs affiliate really struck a nerve w/ me
A Polk County mother says the Department of Social Services has gone to court to gain temporary custody of her son who is severely overweight. Joyce Painter's seven year old son, Justin, is seven years old but at one time weighed 254 pounds.
The Painters are currently at Duke University participating in a special weight program ordered by DSS. Painter says she was told by DSS last month that they would remove Justin from her care if he didn't lose signifcant weight. Painter says DSS is supervising their visit to Duke. Late Thursday afternoon, Painter says she received a call from DSS notifying her they had obtained a court order allowing the agency to take temporary custody of Justin. Painter says it stems from a disagreement over a surgery on Justin's knees, "They told me if he didn't lose weight they would take him away. He is losing weight, he's lost 14 pounds. This is about his knees, it has nothing to do with his weight." Painter says she objected to the surgery because she wanted it done closer to home in Greenville a month from now after Justin is out of school.
Painter admits she was told by doctors at Duke and by DSS that surgery was needed very soon because Justin's weight had damaged his knees creating a health risk. But Painter maintains Justin's weight loss should be the primary focus right now, "I don't think I'm asking anything unreasonable. I don't think I'm ignoring Justin's health. The only thing I asked is for them to wait and for another doctor to do it."
Painter says she's been told by DSS that she will have a court date April 25th. She says at that time a judge will decide whether she can get Justin back, or if DSS will take full custody.
Does the state have a right to take your child away b/c of reasons like this-to me it's clear the mother is trying to help her son & in my opinion the worse thing you can do is remove a child from thier family if it can possibly be avoided.
8 people like this
12 responses
@psychomom (42)
• United States
21 Apr 07
When my child started gaining weight, I had her thyroid,pituitary and pancreas all checked. They came back okay. I wasn't feeding her cookies and chips or fast food all the time. Having an overwiegh child, I know where the mother is coming from. There is a difference though, her child should have been tagged by the doctor and the school nurse. For a child to weigh 254 at 7 years old is wrong. There is something wrong medically with the child or psychologically with the parents, maybe both. Yes, genetically, they could just have a naturally big child but looking at a picture of this kid, I highly doubt it. My child weighs about the same at 13 and 5'9" and I worry. I can't imagine that at 7 years old. So, yes, the state had a right to intervene when the parents, the schools and even the doctors wouldn't or couldn't help.
@Stiletto (4579)
•
22 Apr 07
Well how did he get to weigh 254 pounds in the first place? What kind of parent would allow that to happen? It's all very well her saying that the main thing now is him losing weight but prevention is better than cure. This child's health will already have been compromised by obesity. He needs surgery on his knees because of it at only 7 years old and who knows what other long-term health issues he may suffer. As for the mother trying to help her son they are attending a special weight program ordered by the DSS! What would have happened if the DSS had not made that order? Would the child just have been allowed to get fatter and fatter?
Personally I think where parents have demonstrated that they are not capable or willing to care for their children properly the state has a duty to step in and do something about it. The priority should be the welfare of the child - not the rights of the parents. Whether it's necessary to remove the child completely from the family home I don't know but at the very least the family should be very closely monitored in future. Frankly this mother seems incompetent at best and abusive at worst.
2 people like this
@Lakota12 (42600)
• United States
21 Apr 07
Oh yes DDS can do anything they want too.
BUt I do think it is bad that they wont take into affect that he has lost weight. And also think they could do the surgery closer to home so mother can be there.
But what is wrong with the boy to weigh this much in the first place this is very very over weight!
Dont know if I would of said wait a month tho looks like it might need to be done now but also maybe if he looses more weight he might not need the surgery! Why dose DDS want this boy so bad that they would get a court order to get him from mom.
ONe of those darn metteling DDS people again they think they know it all.
1 person likes this
@Strawberry_one (243)
• United States
1 May 07
They meddled in their buisness because this child weighs 254 lbs. I mean come on, the child doesn't buy his own food but I'm sure that he gets every thing that he wants. It doesn't matter if he loses weight it says that his knees are already distroyed! So he'll have to have the surgery anyway weightloss or not.
1 person likes this
@emeraldisle (13139)
• United States
21 Apr 07
Well I looked on the internet for a copy of this news. I found the one article but it doesn't talk about the surgery but does dicuss the situation. The others I found were just like this one. You can read it here:
http://www.wltx.com/news/story.aspx?storyid=48044&provider=top
From what this article states the mother is not over feeding her child and is not feeding him junk food. She's feeding him 3 meals a day of meat and two vegetables. She has removed any junk food from the house and doesn't buy it. Now if this is the case then it sounds as if there is more going on. That it is a medical condition that needs to be addressed.
I do not agree with the state going in on this. There are so many reasons for weight gain. Medical conditions, medicines, genetics, and yes poor eating habits and excercise will affect it. With this in mind for them to just go in an blanketedly state that it has to be due to poor nutrition is not right. The child does need help but I don't think removing him is the answer. They need to get more information as to what is causing it. I also have to wonder if the boy was 10 to 20 pounds underweight would they be as quick to want to remove him? Being 10 to 20 pounds underweight for a child can be as dangerous for their health as being as over weight as this child is. Let alone where do they draw the line. Yes this kid is extreme but will they go and threaten to remove a child because they are 10 pounds over weight? Scary thought that if your child gains weight they will remove them. What magic number have they picked for when they should go in?
@emeraldisle (13139)
• United States
26 Apr 07
You're quite welcome. That is what I'm afraid of with all the things they are doing lately. Not just with the children but with the banning of different things. They start with one and then move to more, before you know it we don't have anything left they do not control.
1 person likes this
@Foxxee (3651)
• United States
21 Apr 07
Weighing over 200 punds and only being 7 years old is awful. The mother let this go on to far and I think what the state did was a good thing because maybe now when she does get him back she will know that things are serious and she will work harder on trying to get the weight off her son.
I just don't see how a 7 year old could weigh that much. The mother is to blame because she should of never let it gone this far. She should of had him on a diet years ago.
@onabreak2 (1161)
• United States
21 Apr 07
My opinion is probably not going to be a popular one and I am totally against most of children's services because of the way they are with breaking up families. But in this case I think any mother that would let a 7 year old child get to even close to 200 pounds needs to have the child taken from her. She has caused the child serious health problems probably for the rest of his life. Think about all the strain the child has just on his heart. Yes he needs to be removed and it sounds like he should have been removed years ago. No one should have to tell a Mother that she needs to take a child to a clinic to get on a weight control management. This dis not happen overnight. This is an unfit mother.
2 people like this
@meme0907 (3481)
• United States
26 Apr 07
I agree w/ you on how this child didn't become so heavy over night-it is a bit of a stretch to call the mother unfit I'd say more uneducated w/ her parenting skills.I've always & I'm sure many will agree w/ me that food is used as a reward.
I appreciate your response
Thanks for adding to this discussion
+'s 2 U
@Strawberry_one (243)
• United States
1 May 07
First off, Her son at seven years old should have never gotten EVEN CLOSE to 254 pounds. That was bad on her part and that is considered child abuse. It did not just stem from knee surgery. Though I give her the fact that she is trying to help him lose weight and that she wants to wait untill he is out of school and have another doctor do it. But DSS should have stepped in A LOT sooner! You see all these parents today that give their kids foods and candies just to shut up. In my day as a child if we acted up we got our rears spanked and back then it wasn't child abuse! We were never close to that weight because we wern't allowed to sit inside and watch tv all day and play games, if we wanted to play unless it was storming we were outside! But in todays times when a kid wants to play he just sits on their rear and turns on a box and plays it for hours on end. I have an 11 year old brother and he has an X-box but he doesn't get to sit and play it all day long. During the day after he finishes his homework he goes outside and plays, rides bikes and does all that kind of stuff. At night he gets to play his X-box, or watch tv. Don't get me wrong he's allowed to do that during the day but he's not allowed to for long periods of time.
@chaygylmommy (2470)
• United States
21 Apr 07
she's trying to help her son NOW, but you said the article said DSS made her go to the weight clinic, right? What was she doing before that? Does this child have a thyroid problem or something? I mean, if it's just over-eating and neglect, then I see DSS getting involved, but if it's a medical problem this child has causing his weight gain, then I dont know that they should be involved at all. However, why wasn't the parents doing anything for his health BEFORE DSS got involved?
I'm just asking...these are just some questions I have after reading your discussion. It makes me wonder. Of course, we--as the public--never know the entire story.
1 person likes this
@eden32 (3973)
• United States
7 Jun 07
I agree that removing a child who is not in danger is a horrible thing. It sounds as though the mother is making reasonable attempts to cooperate with DSS and to help her son. DSS should be working with the family, not against them.
@meholl (510)
• United States
30 Apr 07
I think if the health of the child is in grave danger, DSS has a right to step in. If there is abuse or neglect, DSS should step in. If a child is overweight, DSS should show concern, and should offer assistance to the parents in resolving the issue. DSS should be informed as to the progress of the weight loss. DSS should not have the right, in this case, to dictate to the parents how medical care is carried out. I believe the parents are in the right asking that the surgery be carried out after school is out for the summer and that the surgery be performed closer to their home. I believe DSS should be in agreement as long as the child is still losing weight.
For DSS to step in and try to take custody of said child is absolute BS. Weight loss doesn't happen over night
1 person likes this
@cynddvs (2948)
• United States
21 Apr 07
I think as long as they are making progress with his weight loss and she agrees to have to knee surgery soon she should be able to keep her son. I do agree that it is completely unacceptable that the boy has become so overweight. If it is not due to some kind of health issue that is clearly abuse. But I think as long as the mother recognizes that his weight is unacceptable and it making strong efforts to help him lose weight it is in the best interest of the child to stay in the home. It would only make things harder and more stressful on the boy to take him away from his family.
1 person likes this
@elizabethbathory (1132)
• United States
21 Apr 07
I don't know how a seven-year-old boy can get to 254 pounds. That's terrible! I'm sorry if I'm generalizing too much, but I tend to place the blame on the people responsible for the boy's well being. It doesn't matter if it's his parents, grandparents or friends of the family. A seven-year-old doesn't go out and buy his/her own food.
1 person likes this
