Teenagers, Drinking & Parents...

Thank you for your response, emisle. You are right, the mother should be ashamed of herself. The thing is, it could be me or my son that are killed by some dumb kid coming home from one of her parties. Somehow I doubt a person like her even cares.. not until it happens to her will she see the 'light'.

Thanks for your response. I'm glad your kids didn't like it. It's not even something that tastes good, in my opinion. Kids do it for the buzz factor or being able to act like they are out of control and like to take risks. I guess that's an attraction to others but to some people it makes them look like idiots.

Thanks for your response. You're right, most of the parents probably do not know what is going on. So many parents don't care or don't want to put in the energy to stay involved in what their kids are doing, who they are with and where they are going. My son knows that if I even suspect for a second that he is lying to me about where he is going - I will check on him. More parents need to get off the couch and see where their kids are and what they are doing. I bet they would be very suprised!

I wanted to add that I'm glad you are driving these kids home but that doesn't change the fact that you are allowing these kids to put something into their body that is causing them to have zero control over themselves, it's harming them and possibly going to contribute to them becoming alcohlics in the long run. If they can't drive home, that's a bad sign. Just my two cents.

Thank you for your response Gerty. An anonymous tip is an excellent idea. :]

cj thank you so much for your response and the kind words. I appreciate it. ♥ I'm glad your son isn't being sucked into those types of groups of kids. I'm sorry your SD is making some bad choices in her life but hopefully she opens her eyes and makes different decisions in the future. I agree with you that's much safer and better to just step up and teach your kids right from wrong in the first place. I wanted to say that I know it's possible for kids to have a good time without all the drinking, smoking and swearing too. On Friday night my son went by another party that another cheerleader girl was having for her birthday and he said it was so much fun. All of the 'good' kids were there and they were having clean fun. Dancing, playing in a bounce house, talking etc. I know there wasn't any drinking or smoking or cussing going on because this is a very 'proper' strong church family and their daughter is adorable and isn't into all that other stuff. She reminds me alot of my son in a female version. They have alot of the same goals in life which is refreshing to see. He said there were alot of the popular kids there, acting stupid and when they realized there weren't any drinks going around, they left - and then he said the party was nicer because the stress of trying to making those other kids happy or whatever was gone. Good luck with your SK's!

Thanks for your response. I bet they could be friends ♥ I'm lucky that most of my son's true friends are good kids who do not drink or smoke. Of course they have other circles of friends from school that they mingle with (like the girl that had this party) but they aren't really close and when it comes down to it, my son isn't impressed by her or her types of friends that do drink and smoke and he's not going to feel pressure to be in that group of kids. He would rather hang out with his friends and have good clean fun. It makes my heart happy to know there are GOOD kids in this world that are breaking the stereotypes placed on teens these days. I'm glad our boys are standing out for being themselves and not being swayed by peer pressure to follow the crowd. I'm glad boys like ours are going to be healthier and better off in the long run for not engaging in such activities. My son is still 'cool' and still has plenty of friends despite the fact that he doesn't go to many of these parties and doesn't sit around acting stupid and getting drunk just to impress other kids who are too drunk to even notice in the first place. We aren't raising our sons to be stupid, thankfully. I applaud you - stay involved in your son's life, let him know you care and love him. Thanks for your response!

I completely understand what you are saying. I even told my son later that night when we were running out for a late night fast food snack, that some kid from that party could be on the same roads as us right then and kill us or themselves and if I was that mom, I wouldn't be able to live with knowing I was a part of that outcome. It's hard being a mom but you just need to talk to your kids from a very early age. Treat them as humans and not people less than you. Respect them and teach them to respect you in return. Be honest with them and talk to them about everything - let nothing be off limits. Make sure they know how much you love them and have their best interest at heart. Let them know what you expect from them and praise them as much as you can but also let them know when they have let you down or disappointed you and how much it hurts. It will teach them to understand where you are coming from and that it doesn't feel good to let the person who loves you the most down - in turn they won't want to do it again. If you stay active in your child's life, everything will be o.k. People have made me feel kinda of crappy for making my son the center of my universe but he's only under my care for 18 years, really and I think when I had him that was a sacrifice I was willing to make (even though I can't say it's a sacrifice when I've enjoyed every minute of it). It has paid off - I'm seeing the fruits of my labor and I'm glad I made him my everything because he knows he's in that spot and he appreciates that someone cares that much for him. It's hard for me to explain but I just don't want you to worry about those 'cool' moms. I consider myself pretty cool as well, I'm my son's friend but he knows I'm his mother first. His friends come and hang out at our house and joke with me .. and vice versa. They like being here and doing things with us which earns me brownie points. We have special traditions like our annual beach party and bonfire or our snowboarding trips and things like that where the kids get to have fun but in a healthy fun way. The way teens SHOULD be having fun. I'm sure one day your daughter will be in the same spot my son was in the other night and if you talk to her often from the time she's old enough to understand, then she will come home after being at the party for 20 minutes and tell you how 'stupid those other kids are'.. and your heart will swell with happiness. ♥ Thanks for your response!