Your thoughts please?

My daughter started pre-k this past year. Before that she carried her blankie everywhere. Last summer before she started school we had to talk to her about leaving her blankie at home. Since we started in the summer before school started we were able to get that under control before school. We did have time where she would throw huge fits about having to leave her blankie home but it got better. One the first day of school when she was really nervous we allowed her to take it with us in the car but when we got out the blankie had to stay in there. At the end of her first day we had the blankie in the car as she told us about her day at school. Now, a year later, she leaves it home unless we go on long trips or she is staying over at my in laws. We haven't had anymore fits about the blankie.

It's completely normal for a 4yo to still have a comfort object. If you leave her alone about it, she will stop carrying it when she's ready. She may always keep it for memory sake, though. I would rule out any preschool that didn't allow comfort objects, b/c it shows a poor understanding of child development. My son was allowed to take his blanket to preK, even. He kept it in his cubby and covered up with it at naptime. He was very shy, and having his ninight there-even if he didn't have it in his hands all day-helped him to cope. Other kids had stuffed animals. Even if a child carries a blanket far beyond the typical time frame, as long as it's not affecting him socially (being made fun of) why does it matter? It's not a moral, safety, or health issue. It can help a shy or anxious child feel strong or safe enough to participate and take some social risks.

I am looking into preschools now for my son. An idea that comes to mind.... each school gives me information on needing to carry a backpack each day with a change of clothes and other required items in it. I would let her put it her backpack. Maybe the newness of starting school will make her not want it right away and then perhaps if she sees that no one else needs theirs she will be fine with out it. But if she needs it for a while, then she just needs it. Part of our role as a parent is to provide security for our children. I have always been of the opinion (as an ex 4th grade teacher) that the less of a big deal you make of things of this nature, the sooner they will resolve themselves.