I feel frustrated right now, do I really have to?

Hello there! I guess you should ask your boyfriend what exactly holds him back from proposing. What he is getting ready for specifically. I think that eight years is long enough but if he'll say that he wants to be more financially stable, I might understand. About any other reason, I think they can be settled. If he's not ready for a big responsibility maybe you can just get married and not have kids right away.

Why are frustrated again? It's because people are always asking you why aren't you getting married, right? You said that you are not in a hurry. So why worry. The only thing that matters is you and your boyfriend. You don't need to be affected by some people who wants you to get married immediately. Tell them that there is a perfect time for everything and you think that you haven't seen the perfect time and you are not in a hurry.

i understand what you feel. 8 years is considered a very long relationship. I know we get to the point that we are ready to settle down and its really frustrating when that times comes your partner dont have the same feeling as you like. We are easily get pressure especially if people around us keep asking about when to settle down. My advise is dont mind them and wait for the right time. 26 is still a very young age though its consider a right age to marry. BUt in marriage both parties should be prepared emotionally, financially and physically so you will not have a conflict after marriage.Since your bf said you have to prepare first for your future i guess thats considerable but of course both of you could talk about it but it should not sounds like your pressuring him.MArriage is not a contest, dont be pressured and dont mind others.tell yourself its not a contest and you should not worry about it. As long as you still feel secure with your bf you dont have to worry.

You got to talk this over with your boyfriend. Ask him the real reason why he doesn't propose marriage to you yet. It may be that he is not yet ready. But he must understand, too, that eight years is already long enough for both of you. You should have plans by now of getting married. He should understand that you have to feel secure that he has plans at all of marrying you. Did he say he has plans for both of you in the future, not now? If he doesn't talk about marriage at all, then I think you should ask him about that. I am not saying that you should ask him to marry you, just his plans - if ever he has plans of you together. If he doesn't give any indication that he really is going to marry you someday, then you'd better move on. You cannot be secured with a man like that. There may be others out there who are more deserving of you and who could give you the security you need.

dont worry jencai your boyfriend might not feel ready yet and wants to wait a little longer to pop the question to you. just give him time my friend and he will soon ask you

Oh no am so sorry about this friend. I wish the guy understands how you feel about this. At this stage of life, one like you must have been a happy married somebody. I feel so speechless about this, cos I tried to put myself in your shoes, considering the fact that you have him in mind and want to live with him forever. I think you should really try to discover him verywell if he loves you, cos that is how some men do. Please do me a favour and try fo stop your present condition from affecting your future. Thing about it ok? Thanks, take care of yourself and have a nice day.

I personally think that you both got to talk a lot to each other about things, ask him otherwise how long he is gonna take or whether he is really interested in getting married to you or he is just playing with your life. Aske him straight forward questions otherwise he won't answer and make him answer to your questions.

i think your feelings are justified in this case./ may be if i had faced the same situation i have felt the same way.after so many years he sud have proposed and marry you by this time. try to talk to him clearly. take ur dexcision after that.

Perhaps you should sit down and have a talk with your boyfriend hun. Maybe he doesn't realise you feel this way and if you can communicate, perhaps he will understand your feelings.

maybe you should ask him, instead of waiting for him to ask you. i know it's not traditional, but at least then you'll have a clear answer.

Since it has been 8 years, have you ever asked yourself what do you want out of this relationship? Are both of you ready for marriage. Seems that your boyfriend does not have this plan as yet. Is he afraid of commitment or has he no intention to commit or are there any other reasons. It helps for you to find out if you do not already know. If there is no intention, are you comfortable with the current going? If you have plans to start a family, have a good talk with him. I wish you well.

I think the best way is to talk to your boyfriend. Tell him how you feel with this situation. And that you are quite worried and uncomfortable with it. And with 8 years together, I think he will understand you. And as long as you come up with a common understanding. Don't worry about what others may say. Your heart knows best. Hope you have a great day Jencai! (^^,)

erm.. i think you have to know why he refuse to get married.. first of all.. there are many reason why guy refuse to get married.. first.. financial stability... is your boyfriend financially stable? do you think he is able to support you for the rest of your life? and additional if you're planning to have kids.. second.. your boyfriend is the type of taking things easily guy... he just want to enjoy life.. and refuse to get married.. he thinks getting married meaning he will lose all his freedom.. which is very wrong... that's how i understand about guys =)

i'm truely know how you feel in your heart, one of my friends just have the same experience as you, she shared with me her feelings. Her bf told her he need time to get sth, he hope that he can give her happiness and he want her to live happy. maybe this is just the men's socalled self-respect, if you love you bf,then just trust him, give him sometime and face every difficuties together! To meet someone to love you in your life is really not a easy thing , just value it when you own it. because he loves you, he just want you to live a happier life !

Hiee..I can understand your problem...and I think its the right time to you people get marry....you just sit with him and ask him when will the time comes...you both need to be sit alone and discuss seriously on this topic soon...I would prefer that you should proceed and ask him clearly what he want??? good luck...

I take that you have been living togheter for 8 years... Do you think your life will improve once you get married? Why? How will it be different? Are you scare of losing him? Getting married won't prevent him leaving you... it just will make it more costly. 26 year old is not exactly old... many people are still looking to find someone at that age. You are fortunate to have had a steady relationship since the age of 18. It is rare these days. It sound to me that you are falling under the peer pressure of your friends... You should do what is right for you... not what is right for your friends. By the time you get married... a few of them will probably be getting a divorce. The only valid reason for getting married these days is to have children. And maybe that is what you are thinking about. While your boyfriend might be thinking of the cost of it all. I would not blame him for that.

You have been together a long time and it's only natural that you would want to move to the next stage. I think an important key to a healthy relationship is always being honest with one another. This means that if something is bothering you then you need to relate this to your boyfriend. Things like this have a way of festering and causing problems. I think that you should set up a special evening and bring up the subject. There isn't anything wrong with that. I understand that others making jokes about when your going to get married can be very intrusive. It really isn't anyones business. All that matters is what works for you. I hope this helps some. My best wishes to you! :)

hi there, i am a guy here who just got married and i thought I could share a bit. as guys, we usually do have to plan alot and for the money that we will required for a wedding, its really not cheap and how are we going to do that if we are not ready finacially? This was what i first faced and my girl was always sulking at me but i know she still loves me alot and same for me. The only thing is that the presure of friends around her, kept asking when are you guys tying the knot and many many others issue that keeps her mind wondering. I am stressed in this process and I kept shunning away from the question, when do you wanna marry me, do you want to? That was 2 years ago. But late last year, my girl began to understand me more and i explain to her why we have to hold on for our wedding. In Feb this year, we've finally tied the knot as I have saved well enough for a big and grand wedding that she probably could never forget the rest of her life. Isn't that great? She is 2 months pregnant now and we are not afraid because i am finacially stable now. Just remember, nothing such as feel its time, it all lies on reality of both parties. Why not start to understand him more. Marriage is a physical confession of love but true love lies within both your hearts. Don't let physical matters affect your relations and emotion yeah. All the best and good luck!

if i were on your shoes, id feel frustrated too. well, may be more than that. i think it's best to open this matter to him. ask him about your present situation. tell him about how you feel and listen to what he has to say. good communication will help, in all circumstances. i hope i am of help to you. i wish you peace of mind... and future wedding.

8 years is long enough to give him consideration to talk about marriage. I knew a friend once who also had an 8 year relationship broke up then married to someone he knew for less than a year. they are happily married this day. if both of you aint really meant to be then you two can never be. why not give both yourselves some space to discern. as the cliche goes: if you love someone, set it free. if it comes back it yours. but if not, it never was meant to be. and by the way, you dont have to apologize for posting such a topic. this is what myLot is all about. and also, you dont have to convince yourself of anything. just have time for yourself. life doesnt end there. there is still a lot of people around who cared and loved you. spend time with them more often than your boyfriend. enjoy life while you can.