Are you happy that you have a child/children?

My daughter was in a similar situation, she eventually discovered the joy of being a parent. Unfortunately that is not always the case. I wonder if this parent would begin to see that her daughter is really a child of God and she really does love her if she was not responsible for her 24/7? If she really doesn't want her maybe she should look at adoption for the sake of the little girl. It can only be ugly if you are being taken care of through duty and not love.

I was only 17 when I found myself pregnant, my son is now 25. I will never regret having him, he and his sisters have been such a blessing to me. It sounds like your friend is projecting her hate for the father and her guilt on her child. But she is only hurting herself and her little girl. Maybe she needs to seek some counseling to work through these feelings.

I am VERY happy with my 11 month old daughter, it took us a long time to conceive & i am so grateful to have her in my life. I think that your friend needs to start thinking about her daughter a little more & perhaps she should consider letting her go to a family that wants a child & can provide everything the little girl needs - which includes the love that your friend obviously cant give her. There's no point in hating the guy who got her pregnant, both are equally responsible for making a baby, an abortion needed to be done professionally if that was the way she wanted to go. Babies really are special & need to be loved, if she cant do that for her own daughter then she needs to make sure she can find someone who will give the little girl everything she needs. Maybe her parents could take the child on - that way there would be love & a secure home.

In my case I am happy with my Baby. He's also an unwanted baby but then, he was made out of love. I love her mom and even we weren't ready enough to be parents we still love him. Your friends case is really tough but then the child has no fault with whatever she has suffering by now. The little angel has her rights of being loved. She must accept that the little girl was from her womb and that it deserved to be loved. Maybe at this time its still hard for her but then time will come and she may be able to accept and give love to her daughter. Everything can undergo process and even loving her daughter must undergo process. You must love her because she's your own. Don't wait until its too late that you'll be regreting things. You still have so much time to make things in the right path.

It's so sad your friend feels unhappy having an unwanted child. More so for the child who has no fault at all being born by her. Your friend has to realize that having a child, is a great blessing from God, a wonderful gift of life from Him. I believe God will not give your friend such burden that she will not be able to carry. She just needs to trust God and ask Him to give her the kind of love that her child needs. Once she learns with God's help, how to love and care for her child, she will experience the joy of a mother and daughter relationship. Never again will she regret having an unwanted child but grateful that she has been given the opportunity to love her child inspite of whatever happened.

I feel sad for the child. I agree with one of the other responders that said she should consider adoption. This isn't the best environment for the child. If this little girl grows up knowing that her own mother doesn't love her, how can she learn to give love back? My husband and are looking to adopt our second child who we would love with all our hearts. We would love to talk to your friend about an adoption plan. Please have her check out our website at http://adopt.bedlamtech.com.

I feel really sorry for your friend. I hope in time that she learns to seperate the feelings that she has for the father from those she associates with her child. I hope that she starts to see the child as being a part of her, and I'm sure one day she won't be able to imagine her life without her..:)

I also had a daughter with a man who wanted nothing to do with either one of us. She was not planned. In fact I did not believe I could even become pregnant because I spent 6 years in my first marriage trying without success. There are times when I wish I didn't have kids. Times when I wish I had a place of my own. Tired of the kids fighting, tired of picking up after them, tired of them whining and wanting stuff. But let me tell you, whatever doubt I feel, is quadrupled with the joy I feel for them. They have made me so proud. My 14 year old daughter brought home a report card with a 95% in one subject and a 90% in another. She made the Honour Roll and is graduating grade 8 this year. She is an excellent basketball player, soccer player, Taekwondo competitor, dancer (just at home) and has a great sense of humour. I went to my 10 year old's basketball tournament today. The junior girls at her school won the tournament last week so they moved to the next level today. She didn't play much last week but she played a lot today and I was amazed watching her. They didn't win any of their games today but they were close games and I was filled with such pride for her. She also is an excellent soccer player (they wanted to giver her a scholarship to play outdoor rep soccer this summer). She is funny as all get-out and has also made the Honour Roll at school. Both girls also altar serve at our church and like to become involved in other church activities. These children, though have brought me a lot of misery (especially the colicky one - I've seen enough puking to last me a lifetime), but they also bring a lot of joy. I can't believe I am the mother of these children. I think your friend is suffering with depression and needs some professional help. She may also want to see the DVD "The Secret" to help her feel positive about life. My children are gifts from God. God has chosen me to be their mother, their teacher and their guide. I willingly take on that role. I have learned a lot from my children. By the way, 3 years old is a really tough age for a single mother. They can be pretty hard-headed at that age. Patience is needed, and strength, and love. If your friend can find it in her heart to forget about the guy and focus on the person she gave life to, she may find some happiness. But I do think she needs professional help.

i am a mother of three children, and only my middle child was a planned birth, but i love all of my children. i love everything about them even when they are a pain in the butt! they are my gifts from the Lord. what your friend should consider is maybe giving the baby up for adoption. i mean if she doesn't want her nor can take care of her, that would be the best thing for her to do

I have one 3 year old son and I love him. He's my precious jewel. Tell him everyday your my smart cookie. which means he's smart and sweet. I've been saying this to him since he was 1 years old. I am so happy to have him. Its so hard to play with him. I need to get back to doing that. I just work to much. I don't want him to grow up and say my mom didn't spend much time with me.

I will admit that my daughter was not a planned child, and it is diffucult to always be able to afford the things she needs, but her dad and I do the best we can and will provide for her before anything else. I will wear rags, before my daughter has to go without the things she needs, she may not alway get the things she wants, but she gets what she needs. We have made it for over 12 years now, she is a good kid and I am very proud of her and love her more than anything in the world, she makes me happy just to have her around. She is a great student and a happy kid, she is involved with the Girl Scouts and was just accepted into the National Junior Honor Society. She has an induction ceremony on Monday evening. She makes me happier than all the money in the world could ever make me. As for the friend of yours, see if she will give the child up for adoption, the child would have a much better life and a family whom could not have children would be very happy.

I am extremely happy with my children!

My daughter was also not plan. But I never felt those type of feelings your friend has/had. Her father is a useless person and never looked out for her. He never paid child support and was always with other women. Anyway, my daughter just turn 36 on May 2, and we are the best of friends. Sometimes I wish I never had her but I think everyone thinks that.She was a good kid and now she gives me headache than before. If your friend still has those feeling about her baby, the baby will sense that and she/he will know that she's not loved. I hope that her feeling change. When she tried to abort her twice couldn't or was just unable to do it. that has to tell her something. If she still feels that samw after the baby is born, maybe she should give her/him for adoption. She will figure out what she needs to do. and if the jerk made that comment he's not the father, she don't need him. I was a single parent and we did very well. good luck to her

As of now i dont have a baby but i will plan a baby in my near future. Even i think fi you have done somethinh unknowingly then what is the fault of the baby . He or she should be loved. Another important point is he/she is also a part of you so you should not let her/him feel that he/she is unwanted. Babies are really angels they are not unwanted.

I am very happy that I have children. I wouldn't let them go for anything. I know a woman who signed away all her parental rights. It broke my heart to know that this happened.