does it make me a good sister???

I think it's wonderful that you want to help your brother and I hate to admit it but I also think you're friends are right. Five or six months is a long time to be helping to support someone's else's family. As long as he knows that money is coming he has no reason to find a job. That's not saying your brother is lazy or ungrateful or anything, it's just that people become dependent. If it were only a month or two, thatwould be one thing, but it's getting to be a long time. A more constructive way to help him would be to help him write his resume (or revice the one he has) and some coverletters for him to send to prospective employers. Talk with him about what he wants to do and help him in whatever small way you can to find a job thatwill satisfy him and pay the bills. He'll be better off for it in the long run and so will you. Best of luck.

You know, I also have a friend with the same dilemma. His brother is always asking him for financial support such as begging to be have a supplementary credit card to the one my friend has. The younger brother is the one who has been splurging (saying he's using that to buy his kid's milk and other needs) with the card but leaves the payments to my friend who is now despairing that he seems he'll never get out of debt. My advice to him was to cut his brother out of the credit card deal but I don't he hasn't acted on it yet coz he's worried that he'll be the cause if the niece gets sick from malnutrition. Like you, my friend has given his sibling the license to be very dependent such that he now sees it as an obligation to give and not just to help out. There is a big difference. The over-dependence tends to make the recipient too complacent, therefore preventing him to feel the urgency to act on his own and exert more effort to help himself. What you can do is talk to him that you also have needs of your own that you're finding it difficult to meet because most of your hard-earned money goes to him and his family. You are an admirable sister but you have to realize that you should help your brother help himself. Think ahead. In two or more years from now, where will you two be? Are you willing to shell out money that long and in regular doses at that? How about your own life? I pray that you and he find a solution that will benefit you both (not just him, but YOU as well) soon. God bless :)

Hi jenstcbt, There is no wrong to helping your brother. But, A man should taking care his family of his own. You had spoil your brother. It is not good in the future, accept you two helping each other in some ways your brother help you too. That is i call beauty of life.

You don't need someone to tell you that what you have been doing is good. You have really tried for your brother. That is how God wants us to live with our brothers and sisters. The Word of GOd says, Iron sharpens Iron - if your brother can't be responsible then you assist him in whichever way and means you could. He appreciates your magnanimity - dosen't he? He does. Then you have to give thanks to God for allowing your brother to be that irresponsible then God will turn his situation around and make responsible. When I say irresponsible, I don't mean living a coward life, no! I mean 'being able to cater for' his family and immediate needs. That's what irresponsiblity means.