Would You Brag About Your Spouse's Extra-Marital Affair?
By biwasaki
@biwasaki (1745)
United States
May 4, 2007 7:47pm CST
I was watching a show about Geishas last night, and was surprised to learn that in pre-war Japan showing affection to your spouse in public was unacceptable. However, if your husband had a Geisha mistress it was acceptable for them to be affectionate towards each other in public. Thus, if a wife bragged about her husband's extra-marital affair with a Geisha, it gave her high status. A wife would tell everyone of her husband's Geisha mistress, pretending to be proud of it, but would often bear the heartache and reality of it in silence.
So my question is, if bragging about your spouse's extra-marital affair gave you status would you do it? Would you suffer it quietly?
4 people like this
5 responses
@lecanis (16647)
• Murfreesboro, Tennessee
5 May 07
Hmm... that's a sad thought.
I guess for me I would have to be honest about how I felt. For me, having been involved in polyamory before, I wouldn't necessarily feel heartbroken if my husband were with someone else. But if I did feel heartbroken, then no, I would not be able to brag about it. If I lived in a society where I couldn't do anything about the situation, then I would suffer in silence perhaps, but not brag over something that made me so unhappy.
2 people like this
@brokentia (10389)
• United States
5 May 07
Well, I know my Daddy taught me to share and play nice with others...but there comes a point that I do Not share and play nice. And sharing my husband is not one of those situations that I would share and play nice with. ha ha
I do not understand the idea that it should give one a higher status.
Sorry, higher status or not, I would not want to play that game.
And I certainly would not see it as a higher status...I would see it as a heartbreak and would probably make a stink about it behind the scenes to try to change it.
But that is just me. ha ha
1 person likes this
@biwasaki (1745)
• United States
5 May 07
Thanks for your response. I think in those days, even if you tried to make a stink about it not much would have changed. Women in those days really had no rights at all; especially Japanese women. They're very subservient and are taught to obey the men and not to question them. Can you imagine having a voice and not being heard by your own husband? I think it would drive me insane.
@vanities (11395)
• Davao, Philippines
6 May 07
I wont brag actually, coz for me im not a winner on the time like this, but to the point of view of the japanese its different so i guess to each his own..In japan they consider women as a second class citizen.. and that im do not approved of.
@yanjiaren (9031)
•
5 May 07
I would die to be honest. I don't think I could live with that. But in their society, the wives were just baby machines and the Geishas were for all the fun. The men had their cake and ate it both ways..but the women suffered two ways because often the Geishas would fall in love with their 'master's but coudn't have the wife status. I think I would not have liked to have been either lol in that type of society. I am definitely a one man for one woman girl, even though I don't think poligamy is wrong in certain societies if the women accept it and are happy with it. I can't.
1 person likes this
@larisara (8)
• Israel
26 Jul 07
Who wouldn't! It hurts to realize your spouse sleeps with somebody else. Even if it is customary to brag or was customary many years ago , I am absolutely postive it hurts. Take, for example, societies with polygamous relationships. On the surface, everything is O.K, but I personally know women whose husbands married again (Beduin women), they hurt, they are jealous, you can't do anything with your nature, girls, even though you get a support and there's a timetable when you sleep with your husband. Don't think I am mistaken. I would kill somebody!
1 person likes this
