Do you feel youre to blame when youre husband is depressed?

I don't really feel like it's my fault if my husband is having a bad day, cause I know that his work stresses him out and some of his co-workers, but it does make me feel really bad, and I always try to do whatever I can to make him feel better. I can see how you would get sad and feel upset though if he's saying his life isn't going the way he wanted, but I'm sure he's probably just referring to other aspects of his life, like work problems maybe. I feel guilty when my husband is upset because I feel like I should be the one who can take away the bad things and make him feel better, but I know that I occasionally get depressed about things that aren't my husband's fault, so I just try to keep in mind that everyone feels that way sometimes. If he says that it's not your fault, then I would try not to take it too personally and just maybe try to cheer him up or something. He is lucky that he has a wife who cares about him so much! :)

no i dont feel that way, but i myself actually feel sad when i cant do anything about the situation. A wife can only do so much and there are things beyond our control that will most likely upset our husbands, like work, boss, traffic, etc.

I understand what you are saying and would some how feel that I was responsible or to blame as well but the truth is we should not try to look at it this way as depression is a disease and no matter who you are or what you were doing , your husband would still feel just as down in the dumps as it really is not you that is making him feel this way . Depression is a disease that can strike at any time and there is not enough information for people to understand why it strikes when it does or how long it will last kind of like the flu but can be treated . Just remember to talk to your husband and to try and be supportive , even if you don't understand what he is saying so he realizes he is not suffering though this alone . Hopefully it won't last long but if he appears to get worse or it seems to linger for awhile then he should probably seek some help as it sometimes require help to make one feel better . Best of luck and try not to be too hard on yourself as your husband is right in telling you that you are not to blame . Take Care :)

My husband suffers from severe depression, it is better than it used to be and he does receive treatment. But, yes, for many years I blamed myself for his moods. He would always tell me the same thing that it was not me, but something inside of himself for the reason of his unhappiness. After reading and educating myself about depression, I no longer blame myself for his moods. I feel for him during these times but I no longer allow it to bring ME down. If you try to stay upbeat during his down times, it may help bring him up and out of the mood. I know, easier said than done, believe me.

oh no no no. your husband shouldnt be saying that to you. i feel so bad for you. i am almost positive that i would be feeling the same way if my husband said that to me. the one thing that i would recommend for you to do, is to tell him that when he says that, it makes you feel guilty/responsible for his unhappiness. i would hope that if i said that, and no other explanation, that my husband would stop saying that to me. your husband has to understand that you are a huge part of his life, and for him to say that he is not happy with his life, well, that includes you too. i feel so bad for you, but i hope that you can tell him how it makes you feel, and that he will stop saying that. maybe he can be more specific and then you can help to encourage him to change his life in a way to make him happier.

i agree with you.in my country man is play a very important role in life.a family is also held by a man. The man earn the money to pay for the everything.so when husband is depressed the wife will feel blame to herself.