should i tell her?

Philippines
May 7, 2007 3:22pm CST
a friend of mine has this boyfriend for about six months now and it was her first relationship. she loves her boyfriend very much. problem is, i found out that his boyfriend is cheating on her! should i tell my friend the truth? i feel that it may not be my business to meddle with her relationship and i feel that the truth will crush her heart. should i talk to her or instead talk to the guy?
2 people like this
8 responses
@thai11 (239)
• United States
7 May 07
Wow..its a tough spot to be in, been there myself! How close are to your friend? If its one of your closest friends and she will trust what you're saying and not think that you are coming from a jealous place, tell her. If she is not that close of a friend, I would talk to the guy first to let him know that he needs to tell her or you will. In my situation my friends' boyfriend was a college basketball player (the University I went to, Athletes were hoes!) and this guy was so loose that almost everyone at the dorms knew what was up so I didn't have to tell her. She heard if from random people- Good luck!!
2 people like this
• Philippines
8 May 07
she is one of my closest friend. we tell each other our secrets and problems even those of our family. thanks for the advice. i'll think about what you said and pray for it. thanks really!
2 people like this
@mahmah (436)
• United States
7 May 07
Personally, I would stay out of it. Only because you are just going to get yourself into the middle of something you may not want to be in the middle of. But I guess it all depends on how long you have been friends with your friend. Also if you do decide to say anything to your friend, get undisputable proof. Something that you know your friend will believe. Good luck with whatever you decide to do. :) mahmah
2 people like this
• Philippines
8 May 07
she has been my friend for three years and we share secrets and problems with each other. thanks for the advice.. :) i'll think about what you said
2 people like this
• India
9 May 07
if i would be at your position..and if she is my one of close friends..then i must talk to her andmake her aware about the situation...maybe your relation will be affected but when she will come to know about the truth..she will apologise you..and afterall you will be doing this for your friend na..and you will be feeling good if she hear you..and if not..even then you will be feeling good that atleast you have done a good work for your friend..
• Philippines
10 May 07
i guess you're right... thanks for sharing your opinion...
1 person likes this
@Gemmygirl1 (2867)
• Australia
8 May 07
This is a hard one but this is what i'd do myself. Go to the guy & let him know that you know what he's doing behind his girlfriend's back & if he doesn't confess it to her in whatever period of time then you will tell her yourself. That way you'll have given him a chance to come clean & if he chooses not to, then you should do the right thing coz you cant let it keep going, that's just not fair on your friend. Plus, if later down the track, she finds out that you knew all along, then that could cause some major problems with your friendship.
• Philippines
8 May 07
yeah that was what i was one of my worries too if she will know that i had knew all along and didn't tell her. i'll think about what you said.. thank you for your advice... super thanks!
1 person likes this
• India
8 May 07
If she is your very close friend, then tell her lest something wrong happens. See if you tell her now, she may be unhappy for some moment but it will be good for her. And if you don't tell her now, someday she will get to know that the boy is cheating her. That time she will be more upset and may be unhappy with you as well( her question to you will be being a good friend why didn't you tell her at the right time). Now you got to think whether your are sure that the boy is cheating her. If yes, then go ahead and tell her.
• Philippines
9 May 07
thanks for the advice. i will think about what you said. thanks a lot!!!
1 person likes this
@Harley009 (1416)
• India
9 May 07
If you are 100% sure that he is cheating her, and she is your intimate friend, then it's better to tell in a soft way ;) You can ask to the guy too, but make sure that you are safe :)
1 person likes this
• Philippines
9 May 07
thanks for the advice... maybe i should tell her asap. :)
1 person likes this
@goosal (158)
• Indonesia
9 May 07
Just tell her about the fact although will made her hearth hurt. Cause if she still have relationship with her boyfriends, i a future she will very very hurt to. i think that's the best way
@gasmas100 (585)
• India
9 May 07
first make sure its accurate. if shes a good friend then u should...what would u expect if u were in he place???? wouldnt u prefer that ur friend tell u than u get to know about it through some1 else. to make matters worse, besdides her bf cheating on her, u too would betray her trust.
• Philippines
10 May 07
oh my! i don't want that to happen... thanks for the advice.. :p
• India
10 May 07
honestly, i believe...put urself in the othe persons shoes, n analyse who would u react to the situataion and do accordingly. cheers mate.my plsure