Tolerance doesn't always apply in my family.

@TriciaW (2441)
United States
May 8, 2007 9:47am CST
I have a sister that lives out of state who bless her heart can be difficult to tolerate at times. She is a bit loud and pushy but she does have a heart of gold. She came back for a funeral and decided she is staying on for 2 weeks. My dad, not all that happy but because she is his daughter told her of course she could stay with him. I do love my sister and know it would be easier on my dad if I were there to help but I am a ways away so can't help him that much to entertain her. Nor can I be there to drive her around. My other sister however said to me .. well I hope she has plans for the 20th. That is when this sister's son graduates from High School. I said you aren't going to let her go to graduation? She said no I don't want her there I was shocked and not too happy. I said my gosh she is your sister for heaven sake. Keep in mind we are also at a memorial service for another family member so to me this was totally unexceptable. She said she didn't care she wasn't going to let her come. I said so you are going to make dad tell her she can't come? She said yes. All I could say to her is that is really sad to put dad in that position. She said.. oh well I didn't ask her to stay for 2 more weeks. I just shook my head and turned away. What would you do? I can not stand this behavior.
3 people like this
5 responses
@mystery5 (350)
• India
9 May 07
I agree with you, this is such a sad, sad situation. I believe that the strongest bond between any two siblings is of that between two sisters. And in this sister's comment, I find a bond that never happened, which is so sad. I really pity your dad too, for being dragged into such an unpleasant situation. I wonder why everyone dislikes her so much! But look at the brighter side. Atleast you still have a level head. I don't think there is much you can do, except try to talk sense into your sister, and if that doesn't work, try to discourage the other sister from going to that function. But thank God that you are not among the ones treating her like that. And then, pray to God to give her strength, because when people are 'intolerable', they usually have some deep-seated insecurites and something eating away at their insides. And to have a family that is also fed up with you - only makes matters worse.
@emeraldisle (13139)
• United States
9 May 07
You sister should be the one to tell her not your father. If she feels that way then she should be the one to have to deal with the situation. I think it's very low of your sister to put your father in that position. I think it's a bit rude that she doesn't want her there but she should have the guts to say so herself. She should confront her and tell her exactly why she doesn't want her there. I'm curious though does your nephew have a say in this? What would he prefer? It is his graduation after all and he should be able to decide who is there and who isn't.
@TriciaW (2441)
• United States
9 May 07
My nephew is very easy going and he wouldn't care who was there. He is the one that always has a smile on his face. However I don't think he would want to face his mom's wrath on this one so will remain silent on it.
1 person likes this
@emeraldisle (13139)
• United States
10 May 07
I can understand that with your nephew. I'd be the same way with my mom. I hope it gets resolved for you but it sounds as if you are going to have problems no matter what happens.
@sherinek (3320)
• United States
9 May 07
No two persons are alike TriciaW. You have your own views and so is your sister. If she doesnt want your other sister to come, thats it. May be she has had sour experiences with that sister in the past and she has had enough. There are moments that we have to give up and stop. But on the other hand, your sister may not be knowing that she is not that popular among you'll. If you have a good relationship with her, try to lightly tell her the situation. She might correct herself, if she really love being with you'll. I think you are a very nice person, and dont let that go. Wish you luck and take care.
1 person likes this
@soccermom (3198)
• United States
8 May 07
Although your sister is acting like a snot by not wanting your other sister to attend she should handle it herself and not push it off on your dad. No offense, but someone needs to tell your sister to act like she's grown, she doesn't need daddy to relay messages for her. The diplomatic way out of this would just be for your sister to tell the other one that she hadn't planned on her being in town for the graduation and that there is no way another person can be invited to the ceremony. When my sister graduated we had to leave out the grandparents because only 4 people were allowed at the ceremony for each graduate.
1 person likes this
• China
9 May 07
dodo..I agree with you,this is the worst situation that one of family is uncontent with the other,which sound sad.But you sure have something to do what settle the problem of them.instance,do just you deem to right thing,the most is honest,honest..use your zap to affect them,perherps nothing for it,but you try hard~~.you will be comfortable in your life~`
1 person likes this