Outside my wall, they were talking about me!
By sreevasu
@sreevasu (2717)
India
May 9, 2007 3:35am CST
The other day after noon, I was too tired with my work. After lunch I went to my room and fell in to my bed. Because it rained a while ago the room was cool. The breeze from the sealing fan tempted me to close my eyes.. slowly I fell in to a 'cat's sleep'. After sometime I heard someone talking outside the wall. I could recognize my friends' voice. I was in a half sleep and don't want to wake up. They were talking various topics and I heard someone asking to wake me up. Another said they can wait till I wake. Their then topic was me.. someone said I am like this, I am like that, I am not fair... someone offended.. someone defended.. I was listening to them in my half sleep. They are all my friends, good friends... But I don't want to wake up because I was too tired with my sleepless work of the previous night. When their topic moved to something else I went back to my sleep.
Have anyone of you heard someone talking about you in your absence?
5 people like this
16 responses
@windhair (498)
• Germany
9 May 07
Are you sure it is reality or something you are dreaming? I have some experience during the sleeping after lunch, sometime I feel so uncomfortable during that sleep, I feel it is reality but I just can not wake up, so I begin to dream something which just happens around myself at that moment.
Come back to your discussion. I also heard someone talk about me by chance. Fortunately, I have not heard sth very bad. It is unevitable, just like we may talk about some others also.
2 people like this
@misheleen73 (6037)
• United States
9 May 07
No, I have never heard anyone in my absence. I have had people talk about me in Spanish in front of me without the knowledge that I understand them perfectly. Sometimes, I am tempted tot ell them I understand, yet don't to hear what else they say. And other times I just speak to them in Spanish, so they realize their errors.
2 people like this
@sreevasu (2717)
• India
9 May 07
Your issue arises when it happens in two different languages, and your response on such occasions are natural, I also do like that. But here I was too tired and in half sleep. As the other friend responded, I doubt it was my day dream or real. Thank you Misheleen.
@TriciaW (2441)
• United States
9 May 07
Yes I have heard others talk about me. When I was manager of motels it happened. A lot of times I would wait and let them get it out and then walk around the corner and say something to them about work. I loved the look on their faces. Then as I would depart to go do something else I would say oh and by the way if I was ____ (whatever they were talking about) I wouldn't be very good manager would I or something about what they said. I would leave them to reflect on what they had said. I don't really mind people talking about me as I always say if they are talking about me they are leaving someone else alone. However with the little lesson I teach them by letting them know I heard it also makes them aware that they should watch what they say about others. As for your friends I would say to them when you see them next.. Hey next time you are talking outside the wall will you keep it down because you woke me up when talking about me. Let it go at that and they will think twice the next time they want to talk about someone.
@frecklelip334 (1668)
• United States
9 May 07
i really like everything you just wrote here tricia. you sound like you sure know how to handle people. bet you were a great manager! and i love the advice on how he should approach his friends, brilliant!!
@DeaXyza (577)
• United States
9 May 07
Why I would love to be the fly in the wall, but seems history did not give me much chance on that except a few times which result in bitter divorce of a long standing great friendship in college (not good thing it was backbiting).... sometimes being able to hear about oneself is not so good (in my friend's case I consider it a good thing as I got out of the friendship fast though I miss her even now once a while it seems to be the best thing I have done )but sometimes it is great when soemone is praising about you! Well I have not done anything that great to have praises heaped on me... so that part about listening to great praises is out but yes I have tried to be a good human being and well good human beings are not that easily appreciated but only by people who know you and people who know me appreciate me plenty sometimes in front of me and sometime I get to hear pleasantest things about me from strangers, it makes my day! But I would love to be the fly in the wall one time in life listening to all the people I know .... it would be fun. Thanks for asking Sree it was a good discussion :)
@sreevasu (2717)
• India
9 May 07
Hiding behind the wall and listening to what others say about us or something else is subhuman. But when it happens as a coincidence we would normally tempted to overhear. While posting I had in mind that many friends might have such experiences in their life and they would share them and heir experiences of handling such a situation would be of help for me too.
Thank you dear friend for your opinion.
1 person likes this
@DeaXyza (577)
• United States
9 May 07
nah I was not talking of hiding behind the wall and I understand perfectly that your experience was a coincidence it is like when we were young had to wake grandma and we would be right outside her room arguing if we should disturb her or not and how she must be tired, she had been working all day and this is her only free time, and who loves her more etc etc by this time my sweet grandma would have woken up listening to our argument and ask us to show our naughty faces as she wants to see her angels! She would not be listening in but all the ruckus caused by us would eventually wake her upto a very interesting conversation between her grandchildren! It is not deliberate but it is more like she is tired from all day's work and wants some peace which we as grandchildren would break many a time! I understand your position fully, but well my situation was different I heard my friend talk nasty about me by chance, the comment surprised me and well she was my best friend then, anyway I got to hear about other bad things that she had said about me to others first I did not believe it then after listening to her comment so openly was what made me change my mind.... I understood that day people fail us sometimes even the best of friends!
But in your case you had quite a pleasant experience.
1 person likes this
@mari123 (1861)
• China
10 May 07
everyone have not always perfect in their life,when you think you are a good man,but other people will think you have many shortcoming.mo matter how people say you are bad,you don't pay attention to their words.go for your way,let them say you.
@frecklelip334 (1668)
• United States
9 May 07
i have overheard discussions before. sometimes i have just walked around the corner to catch them and they all put their heads down, and i'll ask sarcasticaly (sp?) "so do i really do that", or "is that how it sounded when i said that". i don't run into this often but it has happened, everyone talks about everyone. i'm not a gossiper, but if i'm frustrated, i say things, and not always to the people's faces that i should be saying it to. there was another time where i just did not make myself present, as i wanted to hear what was being said. sometimes what's being said in my absence is good however, then i sneak up on the person and will give them a hug! ha ha. this is a very good topic for you to bring up though. i just wish friends could be honest and approach you personally if they have a beef with ya. but i beleive most people really don't like confrontation, don't want to make it into something bigger than it really is, and therefore really just need to vent, get it off their chest to someone else. but if you hear it, and you're not supposed to, it can hurt...and a lil distrust is added towards that friend now. that's why i don't like having huge circles of friends. it can bite ya in the rear sometimes!! not everyone can get along always!!
@Foxxee (3651)
• United States
9 May 07
Yes, I have had some family members do this to me. I was in the living room and they were in the kitchen and I guess they didn't think I could hear, but I heard my name and a few other things come out their mouth.
I think you should just not worry about it. I'm sure it was harmless. It's nothing getting upset over. Brush it off your shoulders and move on.
If you keep hearing them talk about you and you don't like it, then confront them on it and ask why they are talking behind the walls about you.
Just don't let this upset you. You have far more better things to deal with then this.
:)
1 person likes this
@GergOnline (399)
• United States
10 May 07
the only thing that have heard someone talking about me when i was nearby ut they didnt know i was near, was this girl in hgischool saying i was hot and i looked like i worked out (honestly i didnt workout i am big boned lol i have broad sholders) i could feel my face blush lol so i looked around the corner to see who said it, and it was one of my good friends that i knew and had talked to almost every day! i was shocked!
the funny thing is, we started dateing 2 weeks later, and now after two yeas togeather, we are engaged!
1 person likes this
@Zelmarq (12585)
• Cebu City, Philippines
9 May 07
Yes, I have heard people say that about me and have heard versions of things that people tell about me. Most of the time these were things that are not good to hear and things that could really affect me as an individual. Others are lies and gossips and others may be true but I cant help but feel bad about these things for it would really hurt me even if its true.
We cant help that, no matter how we try, there are really people who are not satisfied and would back stab us and would tell so many things negative about us.
I have accepted that reality and I forgive myself if its really something that would is bad or true and is something that I need to ashamed of.
I am also caught in this kind of situation where, I also talk about other people, but as long as I can control my mouth I really try to speak of good things rather than the bad things about them that would really hurt them.
Sometimes, if I have nothing good to say , I'd rather shut my mouth than say anything foul.
Hope you have a nice day!
@blackkatdreamer (1461)
• Canada
9 May 07
All the time but at least you had people defending you! I get talked about behind my back all the time and very few people will defend me and its is almost never good
1 person likes this
@wachit14 (3595)
• United States
9 May 07
I've had this happen and frankly, I confronted these people and so-called friends. I think if someone has an issue with you personally, they should have the guts to say it to your face and not take the coward's way out by discussing you behind your back. However, if you can't identify these people, then let it go.
@mamounz (248)
• Israel
10 May 07
i hink we all must axccept the fact that other is talking about u when you r not there we all do that talk about our friends discuss some of there news like some with other not agree some like other not this is a fact we r taking about others and others talk about us so what the diffrent to hear them our not
1 person likes this
@anindito (58)
• Indonesia
9 May 07
i have heard someone talking about me in my absence but i dont feel disturb.but its not often just some other time.i just listening what they said and never make a 'noise' word.
