Is "Go to Your Room!" really punishment anymore?

My kids don't have any electronics in their rooms, but I'm not big on arbitrary punishments either. If my kids do something wrong, I focus on getting them to fix whatever problem their behavior caused. I know some people use "go to your room" as a way for their kids to cool down, when they're being rude or unpleasant, and allow them to return as soon they're able to get their behavior under control. I had planned to do this too, but I've found simply commenting on how their tone affects my willingness to respond to them, has been enough so far. (My kids are ages 5 and 8). I think overusing "go to your room" as a punishment can set up a dynamic that can lead to more frequent bad behavior, and poor self-control. If a child is having a crappy day, and is full of bad feelings she wants to let out, she can make a scene in front of her parents and get them to manage her behavior before her. Instead of feeling bad about how she acted, she also gets to feel angry at them for punishing her. I'd prefer to make kids responsible for dealing with their negative emotions. We've talked about lots of options for calming down in the past (e.g. asking for a cuddle and a talk or story on the couch, going to a quiet place in their rooms, imagining something fun, stepping out on the deck for some fresh air, exercising etc.) Then when they have behaved in a whiny or negative way, I've been able to say, "I don't like being talked to that way; is there anything I can do to help you get back to normal?." The bad mood often evaporates instantly, and if not, they usually open up in a sad rather than a rude way, about some upsetting event that happened during the day. I think often negative behavior is a child's (or even an adult's) way, of begging someone to notice that they're feeling bad, and allow them a release of emotion. I find since I taught my kids some ideas for handling their bad feelings, they're way more likely to just tell me they had a bad day, than to create drama. I wouldn't want to have in my family. Everyone has moments where they feel like unloading their stress by being belig. If you have parents who will send you to your room, you get to have your outburst,

Young kids today have no idea of punishment. Growing up in my household, if you said no my dad would hurl me up the stairs. Another fun one was where he used to slam me off all four walls of the room. I know for certain I am not the only mid-30's man who remembers these kinds of things. The generation after me had that Dr Spock's "dont hit 'em" treatment. What a mistake.

I don't think it is anymore. My children have all the gadgets in their room as well and sending them to their room is not much punishment unless we take all the cords away from them. Even than they would find something to do to have fun. So, pretty much the room is out of discussion for punishments.

It is when you forbid your kids to use all that wonderful stuff.