In the bible,does jesus says,u need to understand urself before u can love other

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i was listening to BBC radio 2 this morning and a vicar was saying something along the lines of Jesus saying that u have to be true to urself or u need to understand urself fully(I am not sure which was the phrase he used exactly)before u can truly love and help others.. Have i got this right..?If so can u please tell me the passage in the bible the vicar was referring to?