are they rude or am i just being a horrible, unfeeling person?
By smuggeridge
@smuggeridge (2148)
May 13, 2007 12:48pm CST
As a student my route to university was always plagued with obstacles, mainly in the form of charity people wanting my money. I would usually have to pass 4 or 5 each time i wlaked to or from uni. I had by the end of term devised a new route in which i would avoid all but one of these people (the git that stood right outside the university entrance). When i got to that one the trick is to try and get amongst a group of people, failing that i just put my head down and walked.
This probably does sound horrible but you can't talk to them because they come out with the horrible line "every day 100s of children are dying" or similar depending on the charity, to then tell them to get lost is almost impossible (its like saying "oh 100s of children die everyday, well i don't know them so why should i care"). I do care but the point i'm making is that i think its rude to grab people in the street and guilt them into giving money.
My second question is why do these people only hang around outside universities, theres a major financial centre full of well off businessmen just down the road yet i never see anyone outside those businesses. Students don't have money! so why do you keep bugging us?, when we get money we will give to charity but till then let us survive on what is miles below 'the poverty line' and leave us alone.
So is it just me thats a horrible person or should these charities be using different methods to earn their money?
5 people like this
10 responses
@smacksman (6053)
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13 May 07
Maybe you could print out some cards with your email address on it and a description why you think you would be a good case for their charity.
Drop that in their box and see what their reaction is.
A smile and a polite no should be sufficient. If you feel the need to offer an explanation just say that you give to official charieties of your own choice that cover the field he is collecting for.
No way should you feel threatened by them and made to go out of your way to avoid them.
Oh yes, in the UK you can ask to see their collectors licence. You have to have one here to ask for donations. That stamps out a lot of collections in aid of the ME fund - yes, that means for me.
2 people like this
@smuggeridge (2148)
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14 May 07
I do tell them no in a friendly manner, but when its one after another all along the same road it just starts getting annoying after a while
1 person likes this
@smacksman (6053)
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15 May 07
Yeah, it's not easy for a person who is naturally careing like you, smugsy.
I wonder if friends from India might give us some tips here - they are surrounded by proffessional beggers every where. How do they cope?
@ItTakesAllSorts (4096)
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14 May 07
You are not being horrible at all. If we want to give to charity it should be down to our own choice and not forced upon us. When I have been faced with these people I always tell them that I have charities I give to and leave it at that.
It true what you say, why ask hard up students when there are so many fat cats out there who never delve into their pockets and donate. Its unethical for them to do this and they should leave the poor students alone. I am with you all the way!!!
2 people like this
@smuggeridge (2148)
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14 May 07
I think they target students because we are still ethical, positive people who want to help. We haven't yet reached the cynical, selfish stage of all these rich business men.
2 people like this
@littletoad (317)
• Canada
13 May 07
I agree that it's the wrong place to be doing this. Perhaps you should complain to the university, and ask that these people do their fundraising off school property. Meanwhile, regardless of their tactic, a smile and a simple "no, thank you" should be sufficient. You don't have to wait for them to finish their little speech. Just say "no, thank you" and keep moving.
2 people like this
@smuggeridge (2148)
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14 May 07
problem is they stand outside the front gate, which is the only way in and out of my building so they are not on uni property. I just say sorry i'm pennyless and move on, just gets annoying saying it over and over again
@recycledgoth (9894)
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14 May 07
You are not being horrible hun, and I have been in the same situation myself many times. There are always charity collectors about, and I simply can't afford to give to them all. My standard answer is "I'm sorry but not today" and keep on walking. Don't let them make you feel too guilty.
@twilight021 (2059)
• United States
14 May 07
I work at a university, so I know exactly what you mean. Everytime I have to walk through main campus, I am accosted by people wanting my money...as if university jobs are high paying-they aren't, and as if the cost of living in this area is not outrageous-it is. I know it is their job and such but I find this type of scolicitation very annoying and rude.
What I most often do is smile and say "I'm sorry, I can't help you". If they are persistant I just say I am not comfortable give people on the street money. I would rather do my charitable giving through more secure terms. If I have to I take a flyer, but generally, I am against people who force you to take a flyer, since most people take them and throw them on the groud a few steps later. This contributes to litter, which I am very much aganist. I sometimes remind them of this too. That often gets them off my case.
1 person likes this
@smuggeridge (2148)
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14 May 07
the fliers are pointless, every time i walk to and from uni i get given numerous fliers and leaflets (not necessarily for charities) but they all just get taken and then put in the bin across the road with thousands of others
1 person likes this
@Gemmygirl1 (2867)
• Australia
14 May 07
I don't usually carry cash on me anyway but you're right, it's rude of them to expect students to donate & stand out the front of the building, especially if there are heaps of well off people just a little stroll down the road.
I am very similar to you though, i would much rather make sure my own daughter has enough before i worry about other people's kids coz really (as harsh as it sounds) they aren't my responsibility - the parents need to be responsible for their own kids coz i cant afford to pay for everyone elses kids :)
You're not a horrible person, these charities need to understand where they should put their collection people coz outside of a Uni seems like a pointless exercise since they're not likely to get anything there.
I always have people asking for money but that's a reason i don't usually carry any cash, i put everything on my bank card!
1 person likes this
@smuggeridge (2148)
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14 May 07
What makes it worse is that these aren't the people with the pots asking for change (i would give some now and then if it were) but they ask for your credit card details so that they can set up a monthly payment, which is another reason i wouldn't do it because i'm not going to give my credit card details to a bloke on the street.
@rhinoboy (2129)
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15 May 07
I'm probably not as charitable as I should/could be, so I know exactly what you mean. Those people shove their boxes under your nose in town and it gets right on my nerves too.
I give to charities I have chosen for my own reasons by way of standing order from my bank. I filled out the forms so they can re-claim my income tax on the donation too (they get the extra 22% the taxman took from me). i despise the way these people use guilt as a tool for extortion.
My wife finds it incredibly hard to say 'no' to anyone who comes knocking on the door. The most recent one was some type of raffle or lottery in support of a local cancer hospice. My wife was paying about £5 each month to this guy until I read some of the literature we got with the tickets. In the corner of one page it said something like "Collectors needed - excellent rates of commission"
COMMISSION!!!
I noticed the next time he came that he drove a Mercedes Benz! I asked the guy what the percentage of commission on his collections were and he refused to tell me (obviously). I politely informed him that I would be donating directly to the hospice and that we would be buying no more of his raffle tickets.
It amazes me that even with the 'tight' regulation of charities in the UK, people can forge a career from extorting money from folk through guilt.
@5000ml (1923)
• Belgium
14 May 07
I don't think you're horrible at all. We get the same kind of people in our city and it makes it very hard for us to just walk around doing our own business as they always get in our way. One time one guy even jumped straight in front of us forcing us to stop walking - this is not the way you're going to get my money! You're just going to end up making me really irritated and angry. I have no problems with giving money to charity, but I already can't stand people forcing me to do things so this kind of thing really doesn't work with me.
@smuggeridge (2148)
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14 May 07
I'm a little surprised they actually make much money this way because they just seem to get on peoples nerves more than anything. I can accept having someone on the side of the street with a little pot but it should be your choice to walk up to them and give some money, we shouldn't be stopped in our tracks this way
1 person likes this
@scarlet_woman (23463)
• United States
14 May 07
i would mention it to the uni staff-if they're by the door,they're on private property,and can be removed.you shouldn't have to deal with this all the time.
you're not horrible.students pay a lot to go to school-if you don't have extra,you don't.
i wouldn't feel bad about it.
@smuggeridge (2148)
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14 May 07
thankyou, sadly these people stand just outside the university land so there isn't anything they can do
@lucgeta (924)
• France
14 May 07
When you say charity people you mean street beggers or real charities?
What you are doing is really horrible, sorry to say that. I can't believe you never have change to spare. It doesn't need to be much and it doesn't need to be every day. You can't run away from these people, you can't pretend they are not there.
If they are official charities they already get money from well off people, there are more efficient ways to reach them.
Just try to be nicier and you can re-gain your right to walk on the streets as usual. cheers.
@smuggeridge (2148)
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14 May 07
I don't have a problem if they are standing there with a tin, i might even give a bit of change in those cases but what they do is they tell you about what they all and then ask for your credit card details so that they can set up a direct debit so that you can give every month. I don't want to do this because at certain times i cant afford it, like last week when i had £1.50 left in my bank. If i have a bit of change in my i will probably give it to them but i am not giving them my credit card details
