so darn depressed right now
@silver_shaddow (1204)
May 14, 2007 2:39pm CST
I can't move, I can't breath, I can't think, I can't sleep. I have no will to live and become alive. I can't seem to bring out.. the cycle of sadness has begun yet again. I am sinking in my own depression and don't know how to get out.
I am trying hard not to think about someone and I really need to get her out of my head, for she is not worth my pain and thoughts. I just don't know how to do it.
Help me! what can I do? I just can't bring myself to do anything. I just wanna lay down and stay still.
5 people like this
24 responses
@DavidReedy (2378)
• United States
14 May 07
First off you must decide, on your own that you want to live! Live for yourself, not for someone else! Secondly, depression is not something to play around with. Consider seeking out professional help--it's nothing to be ashamed of. There are therapies, and there are medications that can help with the symptoms and behavioural aspects of depression. You must free her. Do you Love her? Then set her free. Do you Love yourself? Then be free yourself. Make it a point to enjoy life. Go rent some comedies. Call up some old friends. Volunteer--help some people who are much worse off than you. Most importantly--Live!
@silver_shaddow (1204)
•
15 May 07
Easier said than done my friend. And I decided that I wanted to live. This is the reason of my post. I know what should be done, I just can't bring myself to do it. I don't have the will nor the energy.
And I have already seen a shrink. The bills tolled HIGH..and the medications only made me sleep. Maybe I should take a second opinion.
What good is love or setting her free when she won't be with me? When she coldly told me she was seeing another man and they are way beyond dates? When I know setting her free will make her happy and leaves me with my own sadness? I don't know if I am angry with her or angry @ myself for being this way. I just don't feel it.
1 person likes this
@jangali123 (245)
•
15 May 07
first you have to accept that time is good healer.every wound pain heals with time if you will think just at moment it is impossible
life is not the name of steadiness,it will keep going on.every body in this world do'nt always get whatever he wants,any how every body has to bear both pain and sorrow.life is beautifull.keep yourself busy .may the happy days is waiting for you.....give them a chance
@dixie1 (1330)
• United States
14 May 07
HI,
You sound so sad. If you find yourself this depressed, I suggest you go talk to your doctor about seeing a counselor (this would be someone you could talk with about anything in confidence) You have nothing to lose by trying once. Also, your dr. might want you to try a medication and that would be good too.
If you are really down about a breakup with a girl friend or boy friend...this will heal in time. If it is meant to be it will, if not, you will in time meet someone else. Ask yourself if it is really love u feel for that person or maybe it is really that u are addicted to that person, if the latter, that is not love.
Maybe try to go out and talk with just one of your friends. Do something special for you.
Consider yourself hugged:)
@silver_shaddow (1204)
•
15 May 07
Thanks for the hug dixie. that was really sweet of you. I went to the doc's once. I think I will give it a go again. sigh
1 person likes this
@deadraven999 (1386)
• Saudi Arabia
15 May 07
I know the feeling. There's this feeling that you can't describe and it feels very hard even 2 share it with people. Everyone will try to help you as much as he can but the problem is most of us will just give you theories on how 2 overcome.
I know the feeling coz my friend i am passing thru' some real bad experiences over here that i haven't been able 2 overcome. How can i extend my help if i just could not help myself. Well they say a person who's not involved in the problem, he can see clearly sides which have been overlooked by the person who's inside the problem.
I know why you feeling that way, not only did i participate in your discussions but i think we exchanged messages and believe me my friend it is all kind of orbiting around that issue, you could not forget, from the inside you don't want to coz you're just flesh and blood but it is a matter of pride and dignity. I am willing 2 go with you thru' this either by msgs or whatever to make you overcome although i ain't sure if i am going 2 be helful. Don't hesitate to annoy:D me with your messages and let us try to come up with something that may relieve you. Hey There's this song i like very much and here's a (part) of the lyrics:
Hit dirt, shake tree
Split sky, part sky
Strip smile, lose cool
Bleed the day and break the rule
Live 2 win
Dare 2 fail
Eat the dirt and bite the nail
Then make me miss you
So wash your face away with dirt
It don't feel good until it hurt
So take the world then shake it
Come squeeze and suck the day
Come Carpe diem baby...
A song from Metallica's (Reload) song title (Carpe diem baby)
1 person likes this
@deadraven999 (1386)
• Saudi Arabia
15 May 07
the second verse is (strip sky, part sea) damn damn damn i keep making typos
1 person likes this
@deadraven999 (1386)
• Saudi Arabia
15 May 07
The second verse is again: Split sky, part sea
Damnnnnnnnnnnn typos Damn x 1000 typos sorry buddy a lot of cursing huh :D
1 person likes this
@deadraven999 (1386)
• Saudi Arabia
19 May 07
Well despite my typos i got best response, i am honored. Thanx a lot 4 it. and Wish you always the best, my friend.
1 person likes this
@Lady_Justice (969)
• United States
15 May 07
A broken heart takes time to heal and I'm sorry you're going through this pain. I wish you peace and comfort and hope that you will begin to heal soon. Please don't feel that life isn't worth living. Even without her, you are special and important and worthy of a good life.
Thoughts and prayers for you.
1 person likes this
@silver_shaddow (1204)
•
16 May 07
appreciate your kind words. I don't feel special or worthy of living right now. But I know what should be done. yet I can't adapt the idea. Yet..am trying here. Am trying.
1 person likes this
@RosieS57 (889)
• United States
14 May 07
You don't say how long you've been broken up. Take the time you need to grieve and then move on. It's an individual thing as to how long grief takes. If you've been in grief for more than a couple of months or for two weeks straight without let up then it is time to see your doctor and get some help.
If less than that then give yourself the time to grieve and heal and then move on.
@silver_shaddow (1204)
•
15 May 07
ONE YEAR. We've been talking to eachother on & off during that time. She called me up most of the times. Asking if I was seeing someone else or slept with someone else. What indication would that give?
To my shock, these calls & on and off convos were "just" pain killer pills. When she finally found someone, she told me off in cold blood. She was playing me.
I should see a doctor again. I was ok till a couple of months. 3days ago marked one year to our bitter break up. started all over again. Better forget the dates too.
My point is that I am SICK of being sad and down. I hate myself for being weak.
1 person likes this
@panicdude (456)
• Philippines
15 May 07
the best thing to deal with depression is to surround yourself with the people whom you think are great. it maybe your family or friends, who knows more but you. talk and talk to them about it until you exhaust yourself about that experience you had there. it will help because it will really make you forget about it easily. it is also nice if you pray about your situation. now, if i were you, enjoy life and don't let that keep you down. =]
1 person likes this
@charlestchan (1415)
• Malaysia
15 May 07
erm.. hi friend.. first of all.. i think you have to cry out how you feel.. crying is a good thing to do especially when you're depressed.. after crying.. get a good sleep..and you'll feel better when you wake up.. i know it's really difficult to get someoen important to you out of your mind.. i'm facing the same problem too. .but i think my condition is much better. .as i have already accepted the fact that i won't get her for my life... all i have to do is look forward.. see what's waiting for me ahead.. i can't think too much about the past.. as they say.. nostalgia is only for the weak =)
1 person likes this
@MyBuddyOnline (24)
•
14 May 07
Hello mate, This story is sad, If there is anyway i can help then please add me on msn: CampioneMi@hotmail.com I Realy want to talk to you and try and help you. I Dont like to see anyone Depressed like this, So please add me and i will try and Cheer you up, Thanks.
1 person likes this
@silver_shaddow (1204)
•
15 May 07
thank you for the request. I enjoyed our chat. Even though it was short. It lifted me up a little bit. :)
1 person likes this
@KaraLee (460)
• United States
15 May 07
sending you lots of internet hugs (((((HUGS)))))
Depression sucks. I know it sounds like the last thing you want to do, but try if you can to do some exercise, even if its just a wee walk round the block to get your endorphins going. Thinking of ya!
1 person likes this
@huilee (1005)
• Singapore
15 May 07
u said u dun wanna think of her, yet...
i believe, every moment u r thinking of her, right?
i suppose u should keep urself occupied...
line up more programmes for urself...
do some physical work out and after a tired day, u will tend to sleep earlier...
i guess...
give urself sometime...
if really gotta, cry out loud...
but get things over...
time heals...
if not, at least it lets u get used to the wound...
i took 2 years or more then tat to forget my first bf...
i did it...
u can too...
=)
@johnwoon (125)
• Malaysia
15 May 07
Besides pouring your sorrow in this forum, you must talk to somebody whom you trust and who would listen to you.
Talking about your problems with somebody would help lessen the burden that you're now having on your sorrow.
If you can't talk to him or her face to face try using the phone. Trust me, it works!
You can't immediately get rid of someone from your mind especially if she's been close to you for some time. But time would!
Try to involve yourself in some outdoor games and let the endorphin flows in your body. This would help you fight depression because it's a "feel-good" hormone. Also immerse yourself in a hobby.
God bless you! http://healthysite.blogspot.com
1 person likes this
@nobodys_angel (2)
• Philippines
15 May 07
We're kind of going through the same thing. So, I know how you feel. You want to be able to forget and move on with your life but you can't. Again, we're going through the same thing.
I couldn't sleep, and I was an emotional mess.
The best thing to do is to be around people and do things. Because if you keep yourself away from people you'll just get even more depressed. Go out. Have fun with your friends! =) It worked for me. Why don't you try it? It could also work for you.
1 person likes this
@gardengrrl (1445)
• United States
14 May 07
First, do some really deep belly breathing: breathe in through your mouth for 5 or 6 seconds, then exhale slowly through your nose for the same amount of time. Do it for 5 or 6 breaths. This will give your brain the oxygen it needs to be the best it can be at this moment.
Next, stand up and stretch your whole body like a cat. This may provide a little bit of simple good feeling, to help get you moving.
To get moving, first, chose your target activity. Make it something basic you've been neglecting, like showering or taking out the trash. You must make the comittment to yourself that you will put one foot in front of the other. Good - one step. Take another. Good - two steps. Keep forcing yourself to put one foot in front of the other until you accomplish your target activity. When you've finished, take a moment to savor the fact that you have done something to make yourself feel better. Savor the small change for the better, and the fact that you can feel this.
Next, you have to find a way to stop the thoughts of this woman from dominating your interior landscape. A simple form of aversion therapy would work like this: as soon as the first thought hits your brain, stop whatever you are doing and do 100 pushups. If this is easy for you, do pushups until your arm muscles fail. When you stop, belly breathe and push all thoughts out of your mind except the burning in your muscles. Focus on this pain, and associate it with this person. Do pushups to exhaustion every time she comes into your head. If you can't do pushups everytime, buy yourself one of those little mini-trampolines that you can jog on indoors, and alternate running to exhaustion with the pushups. You can and you will train your mind to reject the thought of her... and improve your physical fitness, too!
This worked for me after the worst breakup of my whole life. I hope it will help you too. Remember you can walk the road to recovery one little millimeter at a time. Break life down to one second at a time, if you have to. Make the pact with yourself, you will put one foot in front of the other, one step at a time, until you get to a place you want to be. Good luck, and please accept a big spiritual hug from someone who has walked the same painful path you're on now.
@silver_shaddow (1204)
•
15 May 07
Hey, that was so productive of you. Thank you for being so passionate to my cuase. the Excersice helped me breathe a little better. I should do more activities. I can't stay like this.
Yet to tell you the turth I have done all that and it did work. I used to spend all my time out and I was Ok. Tehn the moment I slammed the door behind me, all the haunting ghosts came out to me.
You know what really pi$$es me off? Is that she moved on with her life quite instantly as if I never meant anything to her. She dumped me cuz I found out what she really was. And it sadend me that All those 3 years of my life were just a "joke" .
1 person likes this
@inallduetime (741)
• United States
17 May 07
I know this sounds generic and you have heard it before, but you need to simply move on and forget about this girl. You did fine without her before you met her and you will now that she is gone.
It's very ironic that people often overthink bad break-ups and yearn for the other person, but if it was a good break-up on good terms we go on with life as if nothing happen and rarely think of the person. How ironic is that?
No, my friend, don't continue to be a victim of your own making. I can almost guarantee she is not losing any sleep over you. Thus, why are you be losing any over her? Why are you making YOURSELF suffer?
If she is now siding with your enemies and going behind you back, that is evenmore reason to put this girl out of your mind.........she is simply not worth it but you are.
Best Wishes
@missladycc (154)
• United States
22 May 07
ah silver shaddow. You are such a sweet and nice guy, based on your little chats here on mylot. I really hate to hear you feel so down. I understand that internal feeling that makes you want to hide in a black closet and not come out. Yup..I had that feeling before. But.....Guess ...What.....When you see how special you are....and you start fighting those nasty feelings.....you discover a bigger, taugher, silver shadow....than ever...
DON'T LET THE SADNESS DISTROY YOU....CAUSE IT CAN!
@silver_shaddow (1204)
•
23 May 07
Hey, thank you so much for your sweet, sweet words. I appreciate you saying that I am sweet as well. But my sweetness got my NO WHERE, infact, it got me where I am now. This deep dark hole of depression.. In my darkest hours, I find many serpants how have lied. I also found how evil I can be and that makes me feel good.
And where have you been all my life?? :P
@makingpots (11915)
• United States
15 May 07
Dealing with the immediate, don't just lay down and stay still.
Get outside, exercise if possible, if not just breathe. Be outside as often and for as long as you possibly can. When ever the thoughts that have you here enter your head think "just breathe".... say it out loud if it helps.
Right now, win the battle with the physical!!!! at all costs
The mental state will take some overcomeing and you may need help. The heart hurt you are feeling will only heal with time. You have to stay on top of the physical until all other things begin to fall into place.
Just breathe.
@StarofDavid (74)
• United States
15 May 07
Relationships that fail can certainly cause depression. But there is a relationship that can help in all other relationships. That is a relationship with Jesus Christ as your personal Lord & Savior.
Apart from that, you need to get a schedule going and quit having a pity party. I know it is tough (I've been there)but you have to get going. Write down 8 things you need to do today & do it.
Get up & get out of the house- go for a walk or a run. Take a shower, get dressed, go to the store ,...
Connect with another friend. Stay motivated!
@lkn412luv (4)
• United States
15 May 07
I guess the first thing that you should know, (that doesn't help you I know), is that your not alone. I know if feels like you are but depression is world wide. I use to feel like everything and everyone was against me and I refused to take a pill to make me normal. Watching what my depression did to me and the ones around me, made me think about things differently. I wanted to watch my daughter grow up and be involved in her life. I knew that if I didn't do something...this disease could kill me. I went to my doctor and couldn't even open my mouth to get the words out without crying. She put me on Zoloft and I tell you, that was the best thing I could have done for my family and friends, but most of all for me.