bad breakup

honestly, u should get back..............sure you'll can talk and work out things.......6.5 yrs is a long tim, dont just give it up........pls , talk it out and reconsider. all the best

Did you try to work it out? Whos fault was it? Because I did the same thing that you are going through but I stayed strong and did for myself. I was living back at home with my mom and my grandparent. I felt like I was secure about doing what is best for me. But try to work things out and maybe he or you have a solution.

I had a similar experience but not as deep. In 1954 when I was in Boston going to school I worked in the Mayor's office typing envelopes and had to go through Boston Gardens to return to the dorm. We met a couple of sailors on leave. I can't remember how it got started but it wound up with dinner (hamburgers) the next day. My guy's name was Jack Roosevelt Burnett....if you can believe it. Well, wouldn't you know that he fell madly in love with me. He was stationed on the U.S.S Boston so he came into port quite often. After I graduated he hitchhiked from Philadelphia to Central Maine on a weekend pass just to see me. My parents that he was the best. Then I went to Washington and he came there every chance he got. I tried to avoid him but it was impossible. I would find him on my doorsteep when I got home from work and he would start crying.....he wasn't a drinking man but the more I rejected him the more he drank. The only way I got rid of him was being assigned to Mexico. God works in mysterious ways his miracles to perform. Not that I am saying that you should get transferred anywhere mind you. It takes a lot of will power to take your mind off the situation if he keeps contacting you. The worst thing you can do is to blame yourself for what is happening. If you have been up front with him that it is up to him to accept the situation and move on. Reading, Riting and myLot can help you keep your mind of things. +

you should stay strong and you should alwasy thin of your self if your not happy you should tell him and that way you guys go work things out or just go away for a weekend by yoru self and to really get a chance to think of things without soem one boring you or calling you just stay strong

Stay focused on where you are now and where you want to go. Six and a half years is a lot to give up on, but over time you will know you made the right decision. If it is time to move on, they you have got to do it. Your boyfriend will need time to overcome the hurt he feels. However, it will be better for him than staying in a relationship that has no future. If he is mature, eventaully he should understand that. You now have a chance to get your priorities straight and move ahead with your life.

Dont let your ex get to you he is gouding you to go back with him that is all. My ex is still doing it every chance he gets and i am involved in another relationship now and he still does it. It is a form of control and dont let him do it to you. Everytime he trys it think about what i am saying and you wont feel bad for him believe me all my ex does when he does that now is makes me mad not sad for him. If it bothers you anyways dont communicate with him at all cut the ties in all shapes and forms. That way you can work on yourself without interfereances from him. Hope this helps you.

Well, you are a Strong person if you can move away and out of his home. Most people in this day and age stay with a person due to convenience even if they are not Happy, and a lot of times end up loosing out from what they really need to be, or could be doing in life. At least one plus for you, you are not married. But if you are not Happy, why stay? Making this change could be the Turning point you really need in your life. And if your parents are willing to let you move back in with them for a while, you are way better off. You just need to explain to your Boyfriend what you said here. Tell him how unhappy you are with him in your life, and that you Love him, and wish the Best for him, but that you are not in Love as in long term with him, and feel it is time to move on to something you feel more Happy in your life with. If he does not understand, and cannot learn to move on, it is his fault not yours, and in time hopefully he will learn from this.

It is best to end things when you need to. You are being very brave. I think, though, you might want to take a look at the difference between being "in love" and loving someone. Overt he years I have seen people say they aren't in love with someone jut as soon as all the anxiety of infatuation fades and they start dealing with the daily problems of living with another human being. Too me, that is where really loving a person begins. Your move back with your parents will give you a chance to reevaluate your definitions and probably make you a much wiser woman for it.

You are already being strong by taking this decision in the first place. To end a relationship after all this time is a very big step to make. Obviously you are going to find it hard and it is a complete change in your life for you. The best thing to do is think what your life would stay like if you stay with your boyfriend and compare it to what it will be like to be single again and have a new lease of life. Susan Jeffers is a great inspirator, if you want have a look at her website, she gives good advise. Her book Feel The Fear and Do It Anyway is brilliant. I wish you happiness and success in your new life. Stay strong!! www.susanjeffers.com

You sound like an amazing and strong woman! Good for you for realizing that your happiness and person growth are the most important things. I'm not sure how far away your parents are from where you were living, but one thing I might suggest is a little distance. I saw in your above coments that you have lost touch with yur girl friends since he is so jealous...what about trying to rekindle some friendships? Are you in a situation where you can take a trip? Even just a weekend away can really help to recharge you. Heck, even a day trip to somewhere new can help change your perspective. Maybe give some though to something you have been wanting to do, but haven't done because of him. Then make some plans to do it. This is your time to spread your wings!

First up, I admire the courage it's taken for you to end the relationship. Knowing when it's better to move on, and actually doing it are two different things. I think you have to keep reminding yourself that this is for the best for the both of you. Don't give in because of how much pain he's in. Would it be possible for you to go and get the rest of your things while he's not at home, maybe while he's at work or something - or maybe get someone like a trusted family member or friend to go with you and help you? The quicker you get your things, the cleaner the break will be. I wish you luck.

I think I miss something here when you say you love him but you are not in love with him. Might it be that you did loved him before but you are not in love with him anymore? Of course several reasons might had been involved why you are not in loved with him anymore.He might had been negating your effort for personal advancement and might had been too domineering in your relationship. If these indeed are the moving factors why you have decided to break your relationship, then I might say that what you are going to do is for the good of your own self. No matter, since you are not married to him then you have every reason to leave him for your own advancement.

Girl I know how you feel when you say "you love him but arent in live with him anymore" and when you feel that in your heart theres no coming back from that. He can try to convince you to come back but you cant lie to your heart and make yourself be in love with someone its not. To keep your mind off things & to stay strong you have to surround yourself with people who are truly your friends, go out with your friends and have a girls night out. People who are positive in your life can raise your spirits and make you realize you did exacly what you needed to do. Just remember this: Put yourself first before you put any man first in your life and things will fall into place for you in no time!

I just broke up with my boyfriend too.He was too controlling.I don't have to move in with mom and dad thank goodness.I know it's hard to go on but it's gets easier with time.It may never be the same again.I read alot of books and go to karate and play with the cat and talk on the phone alot with friends not to complain or anything to them but try and think of the positive things in your life.It won't last forever.

I just went through the same thing you are going through now. I broke up with my boyfriend after almost four years. I loved him but I wasn't in love with him and I wasn't happy anymore. We were living together and I kicked him out. We are still going through the process of seperating things. You just have to be strong and remember that this is a decision that you feel is for the best. I know he must be in pain and I'm sure he makes it his goal to tell you on a daily basis of how much he is hurting, but you have to think of how you'd feel if you stayed with him just because you were afraid of hurting him. I'm sure you didn't come to this decision over night so most likely its not going to fix itself over night. Just take one day at a time and think about your future and how much of a stronger person you will be because of this. We learn from our experiences and because of this relationship you will not only be a stronger person but a better person! Good luck!!

wow - congratulations on actually doing the right thing - I am so happy to hear that there are people out there who know when they are in love and choose to move on even when it is hard. I totally understand what you are going through - you are going through a tough time I am sure - as he is too from what I hear. But keep your head up and remember that this will pass with time and try not talking to him any longer or taking his calls- I know it is hard but you are already thinking in the right way - you got out of a relationship that wasnt working for you anymore - most people just stay in them and become miserable people - Think about how mature and correct in what you are doing. That alone is great encouragement. Try working out - taking walks or something or even going out with friends or joining some sort of social group where there are new people - this is a new beginning for you which is great. Think of all the new adventures and situations you will be in now and all the new people too that are headed in your way. IT helps to move on and think about what you want now in the future and all the great things to come - that is what I did - I am so happy now you will be too

If u were not in love with him then how come u were with him for 6.5 years,think about it,u can be friends even after break up,give some time for yourself u need space,stay in your parents house for few days don't meet him or don't talk to him for few days,ask your boyfriend to leave you alone for few days,then think of it and then decide,it's not so easy to break up a relationship so easily,distance can make a person grow fonder again,

hey sweetie, i just wanted to comment and say that i understand how you feel, but not solely my two really good friends are going through something like this .. and im close to both of them so i talk with them both and they tell me how they feel and what not so i understand from both sides, i just tell them when they feel like theres no one to talk that could understand how they feel, or if they cant get everything out of them ( all the right words) then to just write it and get everything emotionally out on paper that they cant and eventually tear it up it kinda of helps and kind of symobolizes throwing out the old and making room and clearing things up for the new

Well, it means that your boyfriend loves you. But if you no longer love him then you should stand firm on your decision. You'll just end up hurting him badly if you give in to him out of pity. Analyze your feelings. 6.5 years is long for you to just decide to end it up. what happened to your relationship? what was the cause of the breakdown of your relationship? is there a third party involve or you just fell out of love? but whatever you decide to do make sure that it's really what you wanna do. and most important you should be happy with what you choose. hope i could help..

tough luck gal i really feel sorry for u