How Do I Keep the Neighbor Kids Away?
By jennysp8
@jennysp8 (855)
United States
May 17, 2007 9:48pm CST
Okay, I have always been a big fan of being nice to those who live around me and my kids making friends in the neighborhood and have no problem with my yard being the "play zone" as it helps me feel better about keeping an eye on whats going on. Well, a couple months ago we bought a new house. There are two little kids who live on the street. Just a while ago, my husband, myself, and my two kids were outside in our own yard with our little dog which was not on a leash (but that is allowed where we live as long as the dog doesn't leave our yard).
I have always seen these two little girls (ages 5 & 3 maybe) playing outside in the street by themselves. No adults around.
For the first time the oldest of the girls walks all the way up the street to our yard by herself. She doesn't speak. She just has a blank look on her face. She is there for maybe 1 minute when she turns and heads back to her house.
Next thing we know, the mother is walking back up with her daughter. She introduces herself and asks if my dog has current shots because she is claiming my dog bit her daughter!!!!!!!!!
I told her my dog is up to date but my dog didn't bite her and I was there the whole time. (I held my tongue on pointing out that if she was a better parent she would have known what had happened as she would have been outside with her girl in the first place.)
Anyways, she proceeds to show us this "bite mark" on the girls inner thigh.
There were two small puncture holes that were SCABBED OVER and the distince between the two "fang marks" as she called them were about two inches wider apart then my little dogs entire mouth.
I held my ground and told her it didn't happen.
These people have the cops at there house at least once a week, when the mother came up she had a black eye and an injured rist, and the daughter doesn't seem to display emotions.
I didn't even think to get my camera and take a picture of the so called dog bite.
Ever since about a month ago that neighbor and another one down the street (by the way - the worse houses on the street) have been making comments about us without realzing that voices carry up the hill and we sit out on our front porch alot.
Comments like "they think they are so much better"..."they must have too much money"...blah blah freakin' blah!
This all started because she had our side yard excavated because it was a large unusable hill that we wanted to level to make a bigger play area and to help water issues.
HELP!
How do I keep these children from coming in my yard without setting these people off into a terrible fit? I don't want to be rude to the child and make her feel bad as this isn't her fault but I can't have this situation get worse.
They are just a law suit waiting to happen.
5 people like this
13 responses
@copperkitten (3473)
• United States
18 May 07
Oh man I know what your going threw!!!! I had a similar incident. I run a day care and the kids are always outside. And im right there with them. Its not hard to sit outside with your kids!! Anyway There were some neighbor kids playing across the road. {history on the 6 yr old, she lies, steals, swears, and is just plain nasty!!} All of a sudden the 6yr old pushed the 4 yr old hard enough to knock her down. Well my mothering insinct went full bore. I asked her why she did it Bla bla bla, Its not nice to do that ect.. Well I went home. Bout 30 min later I have my kids go out to pick up the toys in my yard. She was standing in front of my driveway. I didnt say anything. She looked at me and says F U!! Oh well thats not cool. So I walked to her house and told her mom to take care of her child, and that she shouldnt talk to an adult like that. Well the mom said I pushed the girl down in the driveway, bruising her face and now shes calling the cops and child services. WHATEVER!!!!! I would NEVER do such a thing. Ya we got into a big argument about it. I finally said enough and went home. Well she did cll the cops and child services but nothing ever came of it. {They have had the cops and child services at there house all the time as well.} So the cops didnt believe them.
Well I went a couple days later and told the mother politly that her kids better stay off my property or Im calling cops for truspassing. Sorry it had to come to this but thats how it has to be. End of story!!
I hate stupid parents who dont teach there children and dont dicipline them. The parent becomes the child and the child is the parent so to speak!!
Oh man Thanx for listining to me!! Just ignore the family and if the children come over tell them nicely they are not allowed to play. Good Luck!!
@copperkitten (3473)
• United States
18 May 07
Thanx. I felt the same way! Someone else is going threw it too!!! Hope all works out for you!
1 person likes this
@don_sheru (160)
• India
18 May 07
well this looks like a hard situation to me! 1st of all i feel sorry for you and these kinda ppl really sucks!!
about the kids, i suggest you to be kind with them, talk to them, show them you're careing them! and after few days, they'll listen to what you say...i mean steadily slide them away from you guys!....i know its rude but i cant think any other than this :)
3 people like this
@jennysp8 (855)
• United States
18 May 07
Thanks for the comment. Yep, I want this kids to stay out of my yard..not because of them but because of their parents. I want to make sure I'm not rude to the little ones as it isn't their fault and by the looks of things I am sensing they get enough meanness at home.
1 person likes this
@vokey9472 (1486)
• United States
18 May 07
Is this your front yard or back yard? Either way, you could put up a fence. You can use chain link, privacy or even picket fencing. Anytime they come into your yard without an invitation it is trespassing. We were just talking about this type of thing in my parenting group. Basically, we all agreed that you need to let the parents know that while you don't mind the children playing in your yard, that you cannot be responsible for their care and safety. Let the parents know that if their children are in your yard, they MUST be with a parent. Then let them know that for the safety of the children if they are in the yard without a parent you have no choice but to call the police and report the children as being unsupervised.
For your own protection, legally and otherwise, you may want to seriously consider putting up a fence and keeping your dog on a leash anytime he is outside. I know that it seems unfair to you, your family and your pet, but you have to protect yourself from these types of people. If she could stand there and accuse your dog of biting her daughter when it was obvious that your dog hadn't bitten the child, then she could just as easily call the police on your dog or even sue you if she thinks that she can get a buck or two out of you.
2 people like this
@mamasan34 (6518)
• United States
18 May 07
Wow, it is shameful that you have to deal with this at your new home. Where you should be celebrating and instead you are dealing with this type of unpleasant situation. I would ignore the neighbors that are offensive. To pay them attention would only add to the drama and give them more to talk about. As for the children coming to your yard, I would make it very clear they are not wanted on your property. They are a law suit waiting to happen that is for sure. I would be as nice as possible to the little girls and tell them that you would appreciate it if they didn't come into your yard because you have a dog and her parents aren't there to watch her. If that doesn't work and you do see the children unsupervised in the street, I would call the police or social services to see what can be done about the parents negligence. They are far too young to be unsupervised and running the streets. Good luck to you!
2 people like this
@auburndreams (838)
• United States
31 May 07
When my parents bought a house on a hillside, our hill sloped down into the next yard. It was a lovely garden covered with flowers. New neighbors moved in on the low side of the hill. Right off the bat they have someone survey their property line, chop off the hill and put in a brick wall. Fine for them but now our yard had a 'cliff' of chopped off hill with us five kids running around in the front yard and trying not to fall off the edge.
Then the wife starts putting flowerpots on top of her wall on our lawn.
So my parents were forced to put a chain link fence on top of her brick wall to keep her out of our yard.
Then she tried to train her plants on our fence. I'm not sure why some people feel like they have to take over.
So I definitely believe what they say about good fences making good neighbors.
@mamasan34 (6518)
• United States
21 May 07
I don't blame you on that! I would not look that way either! It is a shame that you have to do that, but there are just some people in this world that make life not as enjoyable as it should be. They are too caught up in their little lives and their drama, and your right too often it is like high school drama queens on parade! LOL
@SilentRose19 (1733)
• United States
18 May 07
I would suggest putting up a fence, is it allowed? See if your zoning laws prohibit fences, it would be a good idea to put one up. I think that you should also continue to stand your ground, these neighboors need to realize that you don't give a rats bum about what they think. If anything else persists I suggest getting the law involved or possible a restraining order on these children, keeping them from coming in your yard at least.
2 people like this
@auburndreams (838)
• United States
31 May 07
Maybe you could look into renting a fence temporarily until you could afford to have one put in.
@jennysp8 (855)
• United States
18 May 07
Fences are allowed but its the cost right now that has got us stuck. We just moved in and already spent $4300 on a new furnace that went 6 days after moving in during the cold. And put $3000 into land excavated to help a water problem. We probably cant' afford the fence until next summer. :-(
1 person likes this
@mama4kids (690)
• United States
18 May 07
i have problematic neighbors as well. it sucks!! espeically if you generally like your area and house.
i would get and install a gate. i know that it sucks but to keep rif raf out, it would be a good idea. these people sound like white trash, bottom of the barrell and i hope that they dont somehow get your guys in trouble.
i would keep watch also on those kids..from afar. call child protection services ifyou think that there is abuse. no child should have to endure abuse, especially from a trusted parent.
i hope that the situation gets better. maybe they will move or foreclose on their house...lol. then lets hope that the new neighbors are better!!
@ladygator (3465)
• United States
19 May 07
I would just tell them everytime that they come over to leave the yard and play closer to their home. And then maybe one day walk her back to her house and let her mom know that you dont feel comfortable with her daughter playing so far away from her house.
1 person likes this
@Debs_place (10520)
• United States
18 May 07
It sounds like your neighbors are the victims of abuse and they in turn are becomine abusers. The woman may have been abused by her husband and she is looking for an out with him by blaming you.
I would keep an eye on the house and the kids, if you see signs of abuse call CPS, get the kids out of there.
1 person likes this
@soccermom (3198)
• United States
18 May 07
Although a fence is a good idea why should you have to put one up to accomadate other peoples irresponsible behavior? The great thing about homeownership is that your yard is considered private property, the next time the kids are in your yard I'd escort them home and tell the parents that you would appreciate it if they didn't allow their children to play there. You're right it is a lawsuit waiting to happen. If the children continue to come and play in your yard call the police. It isn't the childs fault and the situation does stink, but it sounds like you're trying to be a good neighbor and the people who live around you just won't allow it.
@soccermom (3198)
• United States
23 May 07
Thanks for the best response, I hope the situation gets better for you!
1 person likes this
@wifeofharvey (1156)
• United States
18 May 07
How disappointing for you to find this sort of a situation in your new home.
Unless the mouthy people actually do something there is little to nothing you can do, except maybe call the county attorney and find out the local laws about swearing/offensive language.
I would suggest you fence your yard. That way you can control who does come in your yard to play. Have very firm guidelines for playing there and immediate consequences for breaking the rules, like no entrance for x days.
2 people like this
@jennysp8 (855)
• United States
18 May 07
Thanks for the comment! I did already call the township to make sure about the leash laws in our town. I was told my yard does not legally have to be fenced in order to allow my dog to be in it without a lease. As long as I am outside with the dog, the dog doesn't leave my property with a leash, or goes into someone else's property and destroys it or does her business somewhere where she shouldn't - then I am fine.
@sunshine4 (8703)
• United States
18 May 07
This is a tough situation. First of all, these little girls shouldn't be punished for the stupidity of their parents, but you are right in saying it might be a lawsuit waiting to happen.
If the girls come back to your house to play, just tell them that they are welcome to play as long as their mother brings them to your house. This mother doesn't seem to be the kind to keep track of the kids, so she probably won't take time out of her day to bring the kids over to play in your yard. If she does, be polite and tell her that you would feel better if she is watching them while they play in your yard so you won't be liable for any accidents. It is much easier to be friendly with neighbors~ maybe this will help.
@4cuteboys (4099)
• United States
21 May 07
We don't care for the majority of our neighbors, and thankfully now our back yard is fenced, but we have issues with kids all over our porch now :(
I would say avoid all eye contact with them and hopefully the kids wont come. If they do I would just be honest and say you can't play here anymore. Mean I know, and easier said than done, but it seems like it needs to be done. All you would need is for them to trip and fall, and then you'll be on Judge Judy-with these people making ridiculous claims (maybe the dog tripped them, ha ha!) That's what I would do. Sorry your going thru this, how annoying!
1 person likes this
@jennysp8 (855)
• United States
22 May 07
Thanks for the comment! I try not to even look the direction of their house when I dry by. I try & pretend it's not even there. It's not because I am scared, it's because these are the types of people that if you look their way, they will want to fight. And I just want to have peace around my house.
@inhefyh (75)
• China
18 May 07
I think you should fence your yard and leash your dog. Then no one can play in your yard without invitation. This will help keeping the matters away. In addition, I think you should forgive the mother's rudeness. Because every mother will lose her mind when her child was hurted without reasons. You will do the same thing just as the mother has done
when your child was hurt. It's the nature of mom.
@jennysp8 (855)
• United States
18 May 07
Thanks for the comment! I understand what you are saying about the fence and its something we are looking into, but the costs of doing it this moment with just moving in are just too high. 6 days after moving in the furnance went and needed replaced, things like that. My dog is trained and doesn't run about but gently sits there next to me so I don't think I should have to put her on a leash.
I too would be upset if I thought some dog bit my kids, that is for sure. But the bite marks which she was claiming just happend 5 minutes prior to her coming up were scabbed over. They were days if not a week old.
