bullying

hmmm. i guess some degree of bullying and teasing can be expected at this age. the most important thing that parents can do is make sure that this does not escalate, and that means getting involved, getting the teachers involved, having the school look out for the students who are getting bullied, and giving the proper disciplinary measures to the bullies. some schools have zero tolerance policies for bullying, and these work, to some degree. i think the best way is cooperation between the parents and teachers.

That is horrible...what are the public school systems coming to now-a-days.....here in Arkansas...they have very strict anti-bullying signs throughout the schools and a much different appoach is utilized..... You are right about this being a very impressionable age...and the message that I think she is getting is a very poor one...the school should be handling this and right now!!! I think that I would probably call the Superintendent of the Schools and file a complaint with them...I would not sit and wait for it to get worse...also by doing this...you are teaching your dayghter that there are other alternatives besides just sitting and waiting for it to get worse.... The message that the school is sending to your daughter would be the same as a police officer telling her that her husband had to hit her before it was considered abuse...it is absurd.. I know that you are trying to protect your daughter...and that is what you are supposed to do (I know that you know that)...since the school won't cooperate then go over their head!! I would!! Good luck, my friend.

Bullying is a power play against the victim. The bully gets off on how their words can affect other people. When verbally assaulted by the bully, your daughter needs to point and laugh, scoff, mock, do anything except walk away or start crying. When the bully learns that you daughter can't be manipulated the coward will move on to other targets.

I am so sorry to hear about the problems your daughter is going through and as a mother this would be hard on you as well to know that others are being unkind to your daughter . You could try getting in touch with the parents of the child and seeing if this would resolve anything or even talking to the child that was bullying your child and seeing if you could find out more about what is going on . I have found that the schools are not very good with situations such as this and don't want to get involved when really they should . We send our children to school and expect that they will be taken care of while they are there and this is not taking care of our children when this will affect her self esteem and make her feel anxious about going to school . The other thing you could try doing would be to get a hold of the school board and seeing if you could get any further with them . Best of luck !!

that's just so sad. I went through the same thing. pretty much from starting school to finishing. the best thing you can do is to be there and support her, and get onto the school every day if need be. if she comes home and it's happened again, you phone the school and report it. schools will do everything they can to brush it under the carpet and it's up to you to draw their attention to it, every day if needs be. put it in writing too, so they can't pretend it didn't happen. remember, victims of bullying are strong people. they have to be to survive it. you have to be there to support them.

I totally sympathize with you. My own fifteen year old daughter has been bullied only recently and in once case, it became physical. Frankly, she has had self esteem issues because of it and, as a result, she is seeing a therapist once a week to help her develop coping skills. As for me, I always tell her not to give any power over to any other person. Once you do, they will continue to bully as bullies thrive on victimizing people who fall prey to their taunting. It's difficult to ignore a bully, but it's really all you can do in school, as the schools themselves are at a total loss to deal with these issues. Also, have your daughter get involved with things outside of school where she can make other friends independent from school. She needs to see that her life is not all about school and the people she associates with there. I wish you the very best of luck.

Nasty business bullying. Some schools here have excellent policies regarding bullying. My daughters primary school was a case in point. They taught the students what bullying was, how it was wrong & what to do if they were bullied. They then began a bully audit. Towards the end of each term, they sent home a bully audit, & parents 7 students had to fill it in (signed by parents). Any child whose name appeared on the bully audit a certain number of times, was disciplined. I can give you the email address of this school if you would like. You are going to have to approach your daughters school, & be very firm about what is happening, & what you want done about it. Verbal bullying can be just as devastating as physical bullying. Perhaps do some research & present articles to the school on the effects of bullying. Good Luck. Keep us informed, as your daughter shouldn't have to put up with this.

That is such a hard age. The girls are all going through changes and they are all over the place. One minute best friends the next they are enemies. It is hard to stop a bully because once they find the weakness in another they will continue to target it no matter what age. The best suggestion is to teach your daughter how to react to them. That is what I have been doing with my daughter who is 12. I know you wanted another solution and I have done a couple of other things but they are not always the best things. You can confront the child bullying yourself. Now keep in mind you tread a fine line talking with them because they will run home and tell their parents you threatened them and that could get ugly. If you are going to do that I would simply say to the child. If you do not stop harassing my daughter I will take this further. Making sure to give that mom look to try to make them get the picture you are serious. The other is to call the parents. The only thing I have found with calling the parents is that some of them are how the bully got the example of how to be a bully. Some times however the parents will be just as concerned as you are about their childs action and it will stop. It is just a really hard thing to go through and as a parent it hurts when our children are hurting. We always want to protect them from bad people that is our job after all. Again though really teaching your daughter how to react to them is really the only way to protect our children. There are always bullies out there and they need to know how to stand up to them. If it becomes physical which really is not as likely as you may think then involve the police if the school hasn't stepped up. Also tell your daughter that must bullies pick on others because they are jealous. She must be a beautiful young lady to have someone be so jealous of her. Which is a good thing right? I wish you the best of luck and let us know how she is doing. I know it is a hard thing to go through.*hugs*

i was bullied too when i was younger, and there is nothing you can do about it. your daughter just has ta stay who she is, and let her know that the bullies are not any better then she is, that she's not less... bullies often tease kids when there jealous of the victem or if she is the weekest link. i was the weekest link. tell your daughter that she shouldn't let them know that she's bothered with the bullying. cause if they know that they'll go on and on. good luck !

Go up to the bully's parents and say next time your kid does anything to my kid I'll be knocking on your door to sort you out, I did this and it worked!

Sounds like you've done everything right so far. I am sorry this is going on though, and I can understand as around that age and a little younger I was bullied alot. What I would do is give the school one more shot to work it out, and tell them if they can't keep your daughter away from this abuse, your lawyer will be contacting them, and follow thru if they dont work it out for her. If you need to have a lawyer draft a letter expressing the concerns you and your family have and have it addressed to the headmaster/principal. I would continue to teach your daughter strategies as well in the meantime. How unfair :( goodluck to you and your family.

I am not aware of the full extent of the situation, but I think everyone is bullied is some form or another. It is part of being social creatures. If this is a serious situation, you should contact the school and get names of students and try to arrange a discussion with the teachers and prinicpal. If all else fails, pull her out of the school. If they can't be bothered to help your child, why go to that school? or now that i think of it, try going to the school board or a higher authority.

I am not aware of the full extent of the situation, but I think everyone is bullied is some form or another. It is part of being social creatures. If this is a serious situation, you should contact the school and get names of students and try to arrange a discussion with the teachers and prinicpal. If all else fails, pull her out of the school. If they can't be bothered to help your child, why go to that school? or now that i think of it, try going to the school board or a higher authority.

Hi, I feel for you and your daughter. Actually, that is one of my fears for my daughter that some kids would gang up on her and talk down on her or worse hurt her and I wont be there to help her. Have you considered enrolling her in self defense class? I strongly encourage parents to do this. We have to be realistic no matter how quiet our neighborhood is we can never be sure what kind of people are around us. What if we have a child molester working near our children school or a rapist. Point there is our children would know where to hit and where to hurt. Yes, you may say that I am over reacting but I would rather over react than be sorry someday. Hey, its my child safety that is at stake here. What's a couple of bucks investment from me for the sake of my child, right? Bottomline, have you asked you child why she allows these children to bully her? Ask her if you can help her in anyway to make the bullying stop, third, tell her no matter what they say, in your eyes she is perfect and that you love her very much. Now that, will make her feel very good inside. Hope this helps you.