how can you change a man who is only made to be a father...?
By scorpionsoul
@scorpionsoul (185)
India
June 3, 2007 7:51am CST
Do you believe that there are people in this people who are here to do only certain role in their lives and that they are ignorant of the negative points they have or just don't accept their flaws!!!!!!!!!
My fiance has two kids and loves them more than himself more than his whole family and more than....me!
Yes it's like he is born to be a father and knows no other role but when he was courting me it did'nt look like that and i walked happily inot the trap not knowing what would come next..
It's 3&1/2 yr now that the kids are living with us and 4 yrs since i've known him..he does'nt want to part with them not for a day not for a more than few hrs when he is at work..
I feel jealous now and am miserable most of the times he is also possessive of me and wud'nt let me work for a living though provides me with everything except the attention i'm craving for badly..
I'm not a selfish woman i am yound and yet i care for the kids like their own mother but yet im only 27 and lose it at times..
can u guys help me in this advice..?
1 person likes this
3 responses
@huilee (1005)
• Singapore
4 Jun 07
Well, i guess it takes something memorable to change their nature...
Just like flirts...
How can u change a flirt?
I guess it will be making them experience what we feel...
Let them have a taste of what they are doing...
But, a man who is only made to be a father?
At least u noe that he would take care of the family?
I guess for that, its really pretty hard...
All the best..
@scorpionsoul (185)
• India
4 Jun 07
Maybe you are right!
he does take care of the family only that he does'nt think of me as a family cos the kids have not come from me and i ain't married to him yet.
And i cannot change him just like u said either i live with it or....
I done know anymore
@rsa101 (38166)
• Philippines
3 Jun 07
That is the consequence you have not seen when you jump into him and said that you loved him. This is really a testing time for you and your husband. I see nothing wrong with your husband being a good father to his children from other marriage I suppose. It is his obligation to really look for the welfare of his child no matter what happened.
With regards to his attention that he lacks providing you, it is time that you two should talk together and let your feelings flow through that process. It may not come to his attention that he may be neglecting you unintentionally. You should try to be as understanding as you can be with your husband if you really love him.
@scorpionsoul (185)
• India
4 Jun 07
NOW that's the whole thing i never went behind him or courted him or even knew him, i came to know him as a very good friend and we were like good buddies sharing and caring and then he just told me that it would be impossible for him to not have me in his life and that he would'nt want to let go of me for i am the right person for him!!!! And i too cared for him ..
At the time the kids were not living with us and i was just 23 and i guess quite young to make the right decesion and all alone in another country.. and how could have not imagined in my wildest dreams that things would change so fast..
@stacyv81 (5903)
• United States
3 Jun 07
well I applaud him for being such a good father. The kids should come first. But as far as the title of your discussion, You cant change people. Only that person can change themselves. Why not just find someone who fits into your life, instead of molding yourself to fit into his? When you make someone your everything, you can end up with nothing.
@scorpionsoul (185)
• India
4 Jun 07
i wish it would have been as easy as it looks and that i could just jump out of his life like nothing took place between us and is'nt this the most easiest of things to say for a person who knows nothing of my situation as a personal experience?
