I have to go to work no more staying at home
@ScrappinHappyMom (914)
United States
June 9, 2007 3:20pm CST
My husband and I came to the conclusion this week that I have to go back to work full time to help support the family. We just aren't making it on the one income anymore. My little girl is four and she seems to be okay, she was very excited that she would get to go to school and meet some friends. Right now she doesn't have any at except the imaginary ones.
I am really torn between being excited about getting out the house and back into the adult world and staying home with my family and being sure that I can be there for them all the time.
The good news is it is looking like perhaps my old boss will hire me back at the position I left four and half yearss ago. But then on the other hand I am unsure if I should just start completly new or just go back to the same old same old routine.
3 people like this
10 responses
@RobinJ (2501)
• Canada
9 Jun 07
If it will be possible I would start out part time . I know your daughter is excited, but she really doesn't have any idea hat is going on, and may react badly. My granddaughter has a difficult time adjusting to her mom working, and going from school to day care to having her Gran(ME pick her to deliver her to her mom at the bus stop in time to go home for supper after 6 PM. Her mom lost her job and was off work for a few months and now she has to get used to her mom not being there again. I am not trying to put you on a guilt trip, but if you are going to have to pay daycare, it will almost take all your earnings, so may be if you can find work while she is in school, it will work out to your advantage.
I hope it works out well for you.
2 people like this
@pumpkinjam (8763)
• United Kingdom
10 Jun 07
I forgot to mention that. I know the cost of childcare here is not worth going to work for because a lot of people end up actually having less money. Also, the standard (which is more important than the cost!) of some out of school care is very very poor so you would have to consider all of these things and whether it really will work out for the best.
1 person likes this
@ScrappinHappyMom (914)
• United States
10 Jun 07
Thankfully we have arranged for her to start at our church daycare where I know she will be well loved and taken care of. And because we are members we receive a nice discount.
It is really up to my old/new boss if I go full time or part time. But given we can't make the mortgage payment right now I really need to go full time.
Thank you for the advice, it is really nice when people genuinely care for other's situations.
1 person likes this
@pumpkinjam (8763)
• United Kingdom
10 Jun 07
If your daughter is 4, that's a good age for you to get back to work if you want to. Would your old boss give you the flexibility to be there for your daughter to take her and pick her up from school and to limit your hours during school holidays? If the answer to that is yes, that would be great, if it's a no then you could look for somewhere where you could do that. I'm looking into going back to work soon because my youngest will be starting nursery but there is no way I am going to leave him longer than I have to!
Good luck.
2 people like this
@ScrappinHappyMom (914)
• United States
10 Jun 07
If I go back to my old job she is a great boss she always let me take care of my family first when my son was young. Plus my son is now 14 almost 15 so he is a good age to stay home with my girl during breaks and such.
1 person likes this
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
10 Jun 07
I can understand your excitement about getting back to the adult world. It is great to be able to stay at home with your kids, but you long for adult interaction and conversations. You are also torn about leaving your child behind. But, children adjust and will be okay with your working and coming home to be with them.
If you were happy with the job that you left behind then by all means take it up again. If you feel you really need a change, then start with something new. The only one that can make that decision is you. Good luck!
1 person likes this
@ScrappinHappyMom (914)
• United States
10 Jun 07
I really did love the job when I left so hopefully I will feel the same way if I go back.
But really anyway it goes I have to get some money rolling in the door or we won't have a door anymore.
@serenidity (641)
• India
11 Jun 07
Best of luck and I am sure you will be happy at work after a while. whenever you feel down, do remember there are tow aspects of raising a child, one is making sure you are around when he or she learns the first few things of life and is too small to entrust in somebody else's care, second is providing the necessary financial support so that the child along with the family can have a decent life and education. you are lucky you could contribute both ways, you stayed at home and spent the best learning years of your daughter with her, every minute and now you can work and earn money to give her a better life. Many mothers in this world don;t have that choice.
@ScrappinHappyMom (914)
• United States
14 Jun 07
You said it perfectly. I really do feel like I was there for the first and most important stage of her life so far. Now we need to provide for the rest of her needs and unfortunatly that includes things that cost money.
@us2owls (1681)
• United States
10 Jun 07
My daughter has a job - a very good one that pays well. She is an open heart surgical nurse. When her youngest one was little she had her in day care - then when she started to school she went to the day care ( her Mother had to be at work at 7.00a.m.) in the morning and then back to the daycare after school. I lived 150 miles away and couldn't help out very much -and even if I could my daughter still had to pay the daycare to keep her childs place open and I remember my daughter saying to me that what she had to pay for the daycare - if she was on a minimum wage or just above job she would be better off staying home. I hope you can work for a salary that is worth your while in having to pay for day care.
@ScrappinHappyMom (914)
• United States
10 Jun 07
Oh absolutly when I left the work force four years ago I was making 35,000 a year my boss said she if she hired me back it would be at the same wage. So given the school we want to send our little one to I should still be bringing home enough money to justify a full time job.
@ScrappinHappyMom (914)
• United States
10 Jun 07
That is a great theory to work from home but reality states there just aren't jobs that I have found that will make enough money to help support my family.
@patgalca (18366)
• Orangeville, Ontario
10 Jun 07
If you have someone willing to take you back to work, take it. I know it will be hard but if you can do it at least part time it will be worth it to you for so many reasons. Like you said, you will be out with adults again, your child will make friends, you will have some money coming in. What you may or may not know or might or might not happen is what is happening with me. I have been out of the workforce for 10 years and I am having a heck of a time getting a job, or even getting interviews. If you ever plan to go back to work, keep your feet wet in the workforce so that it will look better on your resume.
We are struggling financially and I have no way of helping because I can't get a job. I have to be choosy because of my illness, which doesn't help.
Good luck!
1 person likes this
@ScrappinHappyMom (914)
• United States
10 Jun 07
That is the reason I thought if I am ever going back to work I have to go now. I have only been out of work a little over four years but I have done alot work from home for my old boss, just not enough to pay bills.
I am sure that if she doesn't hire me I could go to old clients and start networking my way to a job.
If you have high speed internet you might try Alpine Access I just watch a whole news special on them. I wanted to work from home for them but I don't have the high speed ability.
@ScrappinHappyMom (914)
• United States
10 Jun 07
Thank you for the well wishes. I have to agree that this is just how I feel about going back to work go work for the devil I know I can deal with or go try my hand at a new one.
@lovelydame3000 (1577)
• India
10 Jun 07
Hi ScrappinHappyMom! I apprecite you for deciding to support the family by working. Nowadays, it is very difficult to have a comfortable living without the husband and wife working. I wish you goodluck.
@hotbiatch (276)
• Philippines
10 Jun 07
Good luck to you. I think you should try your old job first and when you get the hang of it, you can try new jobs. You should not feel guilty about spending less time with your kids but you should try to spend more quality time with your family in your spare time that way you won't miss a lot on what's happening with your kids.
1 person likes this
@ScrappinHappyMom (914)
• United States
10 Jun 07
My hubby and I talked and said that when I go back to work there will just have to be more time at home being a family together on the weekends and in the evenings.
