Being accused unjustly

United States
June 13, 2007 2:42pm CST
I am sitting here minding my own business when my 14 year old son comes and said says "thanks for pawning my game without asking me!". What the heck?! I have no idea what he is talking about so I ask. He says that ever since I cleaned his room one of his games have been missing. Yes, I cleaned his room after months of telling him to do it and all I did was throw away the trash. I didn't take his games, although it did cross my mind. I told him if he had cleaned his own room then he would know where things were. Then I told him what a great idea it was and that I wish I had thought of it at the time lol. Has any other parents out there had their children accuse them of taking stuff from them when in fact you didn't? Would you be mad if you were accused of it?
9 people like this
13 responses
• United States
13 Jun 07
I think the real issue that should be addressed is: 1.) Why would your son think you are pawning his video games? 2.) Why does your son not clean his room - he's 14! When I was a kid, I got my stuff taken away if I didn't take care of it. I would have responded (even if I didn't take it) "I took it because you didn't clean your room. No cleaning, no playing". What's he going to do about it? He's a teenager for Christ's sake. 3.) If your son doesn't clean his room, GROUND HIM. Don't do his laundry until he cleans his room. Make him do his own laundry. He'll get sick of smelling himself (and having his friends make fun of him) and he'll learn to accept some responsibility. Good job on telling him "good idea". Your son sounds like he needs a good old fashioned but whooping or at least to have his I-Pod or PS2 or whatever electronics he's gotten taken away. GOD kids are spoiled these days!
• United States
13 Jun 07
Since you did not bother to answer my questions and I did not ask for you to tell me what you see wrong with the way I parent my child I guess we are done here. Have a good day!
3 people like this
@brokentia (10389)
• United States
13 Jun 07
Honestly, I don't think any of my kids have the nerve enough to accuse me of anything to my face. ha ha Of course, then again, they wouldn't have the nerve to do it behind my back either because someone would tell on him or her. ha ha My partner has told the children that everything in this house is ours. ha ha He bought it and even though he bought it for them, it does not mean that he can't take it away at any time. LOL So...that probably helps to not be accused of such things. Sorry to read your were accused. I hope you son wised up and listened to you.
3 people like this
• United States
14 Jun 07
My husband told him the same thing lol. He likes to say, "when you can pay for it it will be your's until then everything is mine". But on the bright side of things, at least he felt he could come to me and state his thoughts without fear.
1 person likes this
• United States
14 Jun 07
I've had my son make accusations but he didn't come right out and say something so bluntly as your son did. Geez kiddo! LOL Yes, I think I'd be a little upset by it. It would hurt my feelings even more. I agree that if he cleaned his own room, you wouldn't of been having that conversation. Good luck! Teens are something else. LOL
• United States
14 Jun 07
They really are, aren't they? The way I look at it is I will never have a dull boring day as long as I have a teen lol!
1 person likes this
• United States
14 Jun 07
Yeh, it's common for teens to do that. They still need to be more respectful, and I would be very mad if I was accused. They cannot get away with that attitude or actions. They need to be taught to behave better or have results that they will not like.
3 people like this
@castleghost (1304)
• United States
14 Jun 07
No, my children haven't accused me of taking anything of theirs. They know that if I was to take something of theirs it would be because they were being punished for something and I love to give a lecture with each punishment. Personally, I would look him in the face and ask him if he would like for me to actually do what he is accusing me of. That I would hate for him to be falsely accusing me of something I didn't do. I would be upset if one of my children would ever think that I would take something of theirs to pawn.
3 people like this
@tredale (1309)
• Australia
14 Jun 07
I feel for you, yes its happened to me by both my teenages. For nearly the same reasons. Its horrid isnt it. Yes I was mad and I now refuse to clean there rooms at all. I wont even go in and get washing out. I have told them both that going into there rooms and cleaning it causes me to be accused of such stupid crimes then they can clean the dam things themselves. So now I sit and fume at the sight of the mess. Dammed if you do dammed if you dont.
2 people like this
• United States
14 Jun 07
I basically said the same thing but my son decided to "suck-up" yesterday after it and cleaned his room. I have never in his 14 years seen the room look so good when it hasn't been me cleaning it lol. But now I have a pile of laundry to do so today I am teaching him how to use the washing machine lol.
2 people like this
@tredale (1309)
• Australia
14 Jun 07
So did mine lol How funny and a lot of washing Gosh I wonder if there friends lol this is a little scarey. I think I will show him how to use the washing machine too cant hurt.
2 people like this
@tredale (1309)
• Australia
19 Jun 07
Thankyou for best response, Ive only just notice and you put a smile on my face with this discussion and it was a little eerie how our two boys are so simular. thankyou
1 person likes this
@maryannemax (12156)
• Sweden
14 Jun 07
it's the other way around at home. i am the one cleaning and my mom and brothers end up asking where i placed their stuffs. sometimes, even if i did not really throw any of the stuffs they are asking about, they accused me that i had them thrown away. sometimes, we end up arguing because i don't wanna be accused of doing something i really am innocent of. it does not feel good. and as for your son, atleast, you have given him a lesson of cleaning his own room. that's one hard way for him to learn... but atleast he'll learn (i hope)... anne
1 person likes this
• Nigeria
14 Jun 07
well i don't know what to say honestly. yeah i am not a parent but i have been accused of something i didn't do and i really felt bad cause no one believed me for one second.
2 people like this
@maryannemax (12156)
• Sweden
14 Jun 07
yes. it surely hurts when you are being accused of something you did not do. it's like telling you that you are a bad person but you really aren't. that you are innocent of what is being held on you and yet, people always imply that you did something wrong... that's an awful situation to be in... anne
1 person likes this
@Calais (10893)
• Australia
14 Jun 07
Gee, Firstly I would tell him to go to the trash can and retrieve his manners and respect. If that was my son I would walk into his room and grab all the games and throw them out in front of him, that way you can not get accused of doing something that you didnt do, because you done it right in front of his eyes.
2 people like this
@gardengrrl (1445)
• United States
14 Jun 07
You poor thing! I used to do that to my mother, and it made her absolutely foam at the mouth! I guess I would have been angry in her position, too! Kudos for your grace under fire, also for the fact that your 14 year old talks to you. I know many parents of teens who go through the silent treatment for extended periods, and they're all unhappy about it!
1 person likes this
• United States
14 Jun 07
Yes, I feel blessed that at least he felt he could come to me even if he did accuse me lol. I am hoping he will continue to keep the communication up.
1 person likes this
• Canada
14 Jun 07
I have had my kids ask me before if I took something from their room but they never accused. I remember asking one time now why would I do that? The response was I know it's a dumb question but I can't figure out how else it could disappear and thought maybe and then the voiced trailed off and said no mom forget it that was a dumb question but did you see it around? LOL
1 person likes this
14 Jun 07
No 'cause my child is now 10 months old but I hope in the future not to be in the same position as you were
@steve9737 (918)
• Colombia
19 Jun 07
well I am not 14 years, I am 23 years old guy and since I still living with my parents my mother like the cleaned my room, and it is very annoying I don't know why parent have to have a clean room, it piss me off, because I can find my stuff after that, I think you would think the same if someone go to room and something is missing, it is funny because now I don't have much things on my room, just computer stuff since I took all my old games and toys and put it is the garbage, so I didn't understand why on earth a mother want to waste her time cleaning a room when she know this work will not be value, I always have think that clean a room is excuse to check all the personal things ans see if there are something wrong, you know what i mean, so I think you should let him handle with his mess and he will not bed accusing you of missing things so often.