Annoyed and there is nothing I can do! / myLot

Cupertino, California

June 16, 2007 12:21pm CST

I am very annoyed with my SIL right now. She is 19, about to give birth and not acting in her best interest. When she should found she was pregnant she moved in with my FIL because promised that they were staying in one house and not moving anytime soon (hard to believe as they have lived 5 different places in the 4 years I have been with my husband). A few weeks ago we went out to eat with my MIL and she was upset. She was suppose to fly to be with her daughter for a week before her due date and stay for a week or so afterwards. My FIL called and said she couldn't stay there because he had changed jobs and it would be uncomfortable for his new wife and kids to have her in the house because he would be in another state settling in for his new job, but she could stay 4 hours away with her mother so she could be near by (WTF?). My MIL doesn't like to argue so she said ok, but was obviously pissed off. I would be too, you would think that they could get along for 2-3 weeks. This is the birth of her first grandchild too! Yesterday she called and what she said really got to me. Where they are now, my FIL and his family have a house and they are selling it to move to the new state. That is fine and dandy. Well instead of saying "Oh my daughter is pregnant, lets put a clause in that says we can't move until the end of July so she can be comfortable and come home with the baby a few days before me move" they sell the house! So now my step-MIL, her 2 kids, and my very pregnant SIL is staying in a hotel! (odd are they are all in one room too) My MIL told my SIL can go stay with her Uncle who is not that far away from the hospital and she could have a comfortable place to stay. She turned it down to not make her Dad mad. Ever want to slap someone because they are not acting in their best interest? I feel bad for her because she is in between a rock and a hard place, but there is no way when I was that pregnant (or after I had my son) that I would have been convinced to stay in a hotel. I wish I could drag her butt down here. Even if I could we don't have the room or money for another person. I know moving with her Dad was in her best interest because he can afford to help her out and give her a fresh start on life, but now I am not so sure.

2 responses

Sailor

@Sailor (1160)

• United States

5 Jul 07

This may be hard, but first of all is SIL and her man/baby daddy acting in their own best interest. Because if they aren't, you cant really expect anyone else to care or jump to your needs if you don't jump to your own needs. Now I am dissapointed in FIL because my father and I have always, been a package deal including my relationships. I have always told women that my son and I ARE a package deal. If you don't have time for one, then there's no time for me. As far as the overall situation, everyone who is willing to help needs to write down what they are willing to do. Then compile everything together for maximum results, and everyone will do what they are able to. And thats it, one can't ask for more.

Logos_1

@Logos_1 (52)

• United States

16 Jun 07

I really don't dare to step into a discussion of what to do and what not to do. The situation is too delicate. Above all please try to be extreamly sensitive to the need of young mothers during their preganancy and child rearing. It is unfortunate, having to move about during that time. But, personal pride, and financial viability are also at stake here. As a family, continue to re-inforce oneanother, and be eager to be understanding and being their to help in any circumstances will carry you all forward. The Last thing you want to do is to get upset with the situation. The best attitude would be "Hang in there ! we are all with you" ! God love you and bless you all !