Safety Planning

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Do You have a 'Depression Safety Plan'? Many people who suffer with depression experience 'low times' where they aren't very interactive with others, where they feel very low, sad, frustrated, hopeless. They will often isolate themselves and be unable to successfully deal with their hopeless feelings for quite a time. This can extend the length of time that they're feeling 'the blues' - or worse - feeling severe hopelessness and apathy. Sometimes, the feelings can get overwhelming - especially since a person tends to isolate and not ask for help. The length of time that a person is isolated, feeling 'low' can dramatically be reduced if they have a 'safety plan' for times like these. And - if they share their plan with one or two trusted friends or family members. Sometimes, part of the safety plan can just be, "If you notice that I'm isolating, be kind...I'm in a sensitive state when this happens." This is just something for everyone to keep in mind. Often, a depressed person cannot help feeling depressed - especially if their condition is very largely biologically based (there are all different types of depression - some more rooted in physical, less manageable causes than others!). A lot of family members or friends who encounter others with depression really DO NOT KNOW HOW TO HELP - and sometimes their 'help' is harmful - if it involves an immediate 'CHEER UP' 'SUCK IT UP THAT'S LIFE - MOVE FORWARD NOW.' That may be what the 'helpful' friend or family member does if they realize they are feeling a touch of 'the blues,' however, this attitude often only works for people who aren't suffering from chronic, physiological symptoms of depression. Naturally, a tactic such as this isn't useful for everyone. "Get Happy" "Cheer up" "Change Your Attitude" "Why can't you just stop thinking about THAT and do something positive?" "Think Positively and Things Will Be Better" Those are actually pretty threatening hurtful words to some who begin to dip lower in mood and who has a legitimate depression disorder. Those statements and questions can actually begin a cycle of guilt, anger, self-blame, frustration, and an even LOWER and longer-extending mood than the depressed person began with in the first place. If depressed people knew HOW TO just 'change attitude,' believe me - almost ALL OF THEM WOULD - if it were that easy. They wouldn't suffer - and they DO SUFFER TERRIBLY WITH DEPRESSION - if the 'tools' for healthier people WITHOUT depression worked for them. Telling someone diagnosed with the condition of depression to 'just cheer up' is very much like telling a 5 year old to run out, start the car and bring it around front so the family can climb in the car and start their road-trip vacation. A 5 year old will understand every stage of the instructions and even WHY you want him or her to go get the car. A 5 year old has even watched, over and over again, how the car is started, driven, put into park, etc. But that doesn't mean that he or she actually has the skill and co-ordination to do the tasks. The child will even desperately WANT TO HELP and do the task so that the roadtrip can begin. In the same way - most people suffering depression desperately WANT TO CHEER UP so they can feel healthier. But the instructions 'cheer up' don't match up with their biochemistry or their coping skill level, for some reason. Safety planning with significant friends and family members can help a lot. There doesn't have to be a whole lot of discussion about 'what to do,' or any helpful-but-not-helpful words of advice with safety planning. Make the safety instructions 'Action-based' - like: "If you see me isolating and I seem depressed - allow me 1 hour alone - then book me an 'event' (like a walk to the park, just a walk to the store - something that gets the depressed person MOVING and OUT of isolation - but won't necessarily force the person to interact in a busy way) and let me know, in 1 hour that it's time for an 'action event' to help me manage depression." Sometimes depressed people DO NEED TO BE ALONE...just not constantly or for a length of time that interferes with healthy activities. Do you have some 'Safety Planning' tips you can share?