Don't talk about the past....
By jershey
@jershey (71)
Philippines
5 responses
@mwala1287 (284)
• Canada
27 Mar 08
couples should feel comfortable about talking about anything with each other. but quite frankly, that is not always the case. i am not comfortable about hearing about my bfs past but of course if there is something that i need to know, then i would prefer know. but i can hear about it and not get franctic about it, i just begin to feel uncomfortable with details, because i dont really need them. the information given is enough, whether details are, or are not provided is up to the persons personal choice. i am however comfortable talking about my past with my bf. i feel i do not have to hide anything from him. but then again, i am not going to list out every event that happenned in my past, i am going to give him the highlights so to speak, the information that he will want to know (whether it be negative or positive information). I feel the same about details in this area, as well. why go into details? it\s not neccessary but if he is/ was to ask, i would feel free and give it. i want him to feel comfortable with talking to me about anything. and i want him to have trust in me and take my every word so i am honest whenever i get the opportunity to do so.
@kitan2979 (115)
• Philippines
20 Mar 08
No, especially if its being brought up from time to time! Actually, thats my concern right now because my bf is so open and honest about his past relationships that most of the time it gets to my nerves and I just get jealous..
@Ace2242 (111)
• India
23 Jun 07
well yes if there was any , coz that would help me realize things that i shouldn't do or things that are imp to her and things that are relevant to her in any sense .
It would help me to get to know her better and know about her experience and what she wants and she needs ...
i just feel like everything that happens either good or bad they just teach us something in life , maybe the easy way or the hard way , but it does help in the long run , maybe not for us ...but for someone else .
so i am comfortable talking about past relationships with my gf , but in my case its vice versa , i told her about my past .
@cynddvs (2948)
• United States
23 Jun 07
I'm comfortable with it just because the past is the past with us. We can't undo or change anything we've done in the past. The only way it would bother me is if that was all he talked about. Our past only comes up very occassionaly and we'll briefly talk about it. No biggie.
@LadyK2 (71)
• United States
23 Jun 07
My husband and I know all about all our ex's - we were friends for 4 years before we started dating. We don't have a problem with it and even jokingly tease each other about various ones on occasion as we knew them ourselves.
You have to feel secure in your relationship - if you don't then you shouldn't be in it - or every little thing will feel like an affront. What happened in the past is past, and it won't change or go away just because you don't like it. I have things in my past I wish I could change, but IF I changed them, my life as it is now would be very different - and that's something I would never want to change as I love my husband and kids completely.
JMO