Have you ever loved someone but know you can not be with them?
By TriciaW
@TriciaW (2441)
United States
June 25, 2007 3:06pm CST
I do love a man that I can only be friends with. He is so good to me but he is someone that can not be strictly with one woman. He and I were together off and on for 8 years but when another woman came into the picture I would leave. He knew I didn't share well with others and he never really lied to me about it so I have to say I would go back with open eyes. He and I agree we can not be together as more then friends and we have done really well the past 2 years but there are times when I talk to him that it is so hard not to have those old feelings. Today I talked to him and I was rather emotional anyway as some know my problems this morning. He quickly became his old self and fixed my problem for me. After I got off the phone I burst into tears. The times he and I were together I was a better person then I think at times I am now. I was also happier then I am now. I know it is wrong since I am with someone else and trust me nothing will happen between him and I but all those feelings just come crashing down on me. I guess I will get over it I always do but I just really miss him even though I know it can not be more. Have you ever had that someone in your life?
2 people like this
19 responses
@misshoney (973)
• Philippines
26 Jun 07
well, i never had that kind of relationship with someone. But I do sympathize with people like you.
1 person likes this
@vonn1378 (706)
• Philippines
26 Jun 07
Loving someone that we cannot be with are one of my experiences. I have this childhood friend of mine that we spend all summer together almost everyday. Being young and naive I was'nt able to see his actions that he cared for me more than friends. When both of us realized that we fell inlove with each other. I'm already committed to someone that no matter how strong the feeling is I cannot spend time with him anymore. Sometimes regrets came in but I just have to let go because if not it will just be creating heartaches and more misgivings. Now I feel more better after letting go. And I believe that memories are GrEAT when you don't need to deal with the Past...
Hope you can move on and find someone that would treasure you and more worthy of the love you'll share. It will be hard I know but just let go and you'll be more happier than ever..(,")
1 person likes this
@MGjhaud (23240)
• Philippines
26 Jun 07
yes i did love someone before. i tried to believe we're going to work. the relationship will work. but then, things got tough between us. we were a long distance couple and i believe it'll work no matter how far you both are but then it is so hard to grow or work on the relationship if you're apart.
we love each other. i know that but i gave it up. we talked about the things that we will never fixed the things that we both cannot understand unless we grow -- apart. so there.. we broke up but the good thing is we're still friends up to now. sometimes we see each other and talk things.
1 person likes this
@scorpionsoul (185)
• India
26 Jun 07
Really it amazes me at times when i read these things it's almost that everyont has had one bad phase when it came to love and your story is so similar to mine only difference is taht i cannot call my ex and talk to him my fiance would kill me and he knows in some ways that because my boyfriend was my first love i would never forget him and he is so true..
I love the way we used to gel it's almost like bread and milk when you buy one you think of the other..
I just left the country to make my career and life took a turn for the worst and now i can't believe i'm never going to be with him again in the same way..
Sorry for the long thesis but cudn't stop passing by the memory lane..
@maictorek (83)
• Philippines
26 Jun 07
i met a guy a couple of years ago and it didnt take a long time for me to realize i wanted to be with him. unfortunately, he never thot of our relationship going beyond the borders of friendship. he would say the nicest things, some even opened up a few realizations on my part. in as much as it saddens me that we cannot be together, i think i would be more hurt if we were together but i'll never be his priority.
1 person likes this
@magikrose (5429)
• United States
26 Jun 07
I totally understand where you are coming from. I am currently married to a wonderfull guy but back in high school I fell for my bestfriend, and I fell hard. The thing was we didnt want to mess up our friendship so we ended up being friends with benefits. When we both went our own ways and got married to other people we didnt have contact.
A few months ago I was reuinted with him and all I wanted to to was jump into his arms and hold him and neverlet go. LIke you those feelings came rushing back and I know he knew it.
We have decided to keep it purly as friends and nothing more. It was hard at first but gets easier overtime.
1 person likes this
@margieanneart (26423)
• United States
25 Jun 07
I had a boyfriend in my life over 40 years ago. Cirumstances prevented us from getting married. To make a long story short, we lost contact, but either of us never forgot one another. Two years ago, a freak thing happened, we met. After all these years, nothing changed, except we both are married. So, we still cannot get together, but still feel the same way.
1 person likes this
@violet2014 (325)
• India
25 Jun 07
ya i am a 20 year old gal in love with my teacher who is 32 ,his house was just in front of my house when my father got transferred to that city and i was just 5 years old ,he was my tutuor when i was 6 and till now he is my teacher,now he does not give me tution but now he gives me guidance,he knows that i love him but he also says that he loves me but i know he doesn't love me the same way as i do , he has a fatherly love for me and now this year he got married and then also i love him and i think i will always be in love with him.
1 person likes this
@babostwick (2036)
• United States
25 Jun 07
I have but she was in a relationship so I had to respect her on that. I stayed friends with her throughout High School and we were close. I'd say we have a strong friendship and would help her when I could and vice versa. I always got along with her and she joined the service.
I had wished her well and I believe she could be out in Iraq for the Navy but I'm not sure where. I haven't seen her in 5 years and I'm not sure if she'll be there at the Reunion or what all has happened. Maybe there is a chance of it being more than friends but maybe not. Only time will tell as she is not the only one I've cared about.
1 person likes this
@chenee08 (591)
• Philippines
26 Jun 07
yeah, we were friends for 2 yrs now. we always hangout together. even my friends think that we're more than just friends coz we're sweet. i didnt really thought of falling inlove with him coz that time i was in love with someone else . just last november. when things started to change, i haven't seen him for quite long time and i missed him. when i shared those things to one of my friends he said it's something that i'll find out soon. so i did. i learn that i'm falling in love with him. it's hard for me to hold back coz we always see each other before. but now,it's been 2 months since i last saw him. we're still friends. he doesn't know my feelings for him and i dont want him to know coz its one sided love. sometimes we talked if he's online in YM. things aren't the same now. i miss his company, i miss his cory joke.;(
1 person likes this
@FSCAries (881)
• United States
26 Jun 07
My situation is a little different, but I am madly in love with a man that I cannot be with. He loves me too and we do get together on the off chance that we can steal away for a minute, but my family is totally against him. They are against him over things that they do not understand, so it's very hard because they dislike him very much, yet he is the only person that I want. It is a very hard thing, to love someone so much and for them to love you deeply back, but to be kept from them. Time will tell though, as soon as I get through the obstacles that are in front of me now, I will be with him again one day... soon, I hope!
1 person likes this
@soccerdude (272)
• United States
25 Jun 07
I had the same sort of problem with this girl a few years back. She was definitely my first love, but I never even asked her out because I was too scared that she would cheat on me. We were basically seeing each other, and then at a party I found out that she had hooked up with one of my friends. I recently moved and have only seen her once in the past year. I miss her a lot but I know that even if I was with her, it would eventually crumble. It sucks but people dont really ever change.
Cheers
1 person likes this
@blog8withJ (136)
• United States
26 Jun 07
Yes, it happened. Its heart breaking anyway but the only thing to response to this certain feelings is to move on and forget it. I don't actually like to store a feelings inside in my heart that just heartbreaking. Too bad for my nerves.
@angelface23 (2494)
• United States
26 Jun 07
all to well. About two years ago I met this guy and I just fell for him instantly. Not in love but infatuted with him. He didnt even have to speak all i wanted to do was just stare at him all day. We ended up having a 'fling'. I saw him a few months ago, he came into my work. Of course he was looking good as ever and it seemed like he was glad to see me again. But I am married now and I have a daughter so I know we could never hook back up but I have been thinking about him ALOT these past few months. He isn't really relationship material but I would happy if we were just sleeping together as I am not getting any. I know it sounds really trashy but if things were different two years ago and it wasn't just a fling I bet I'd still be with him.
@smacksman (6053)
•
26 Jun 07
It just prooves that you CAN love two people at the same time.
It is just that you love them in different ways.
In most of our societies you are not allowed to have a three sided marriage so you have to make a choice between your two loves. But that doesn't stop the love and it shouldn't stop the love.
@poetshannon (113)
• United States
26 Jun 07
i been there done that. at least you didnt have a child by him like i did.i came to the relaize that i deserved better i wanted more and he couldnt give me more.it took some time for me to get over the fact that no matter how i felt about him and how much we love each other he couldnt give me what i wanted in a relationship.now we are best of friends he is there for me anyime i need him but iam glad i went on with my life because i may have missed out on real love like i have now.so yea it hurts and it hard to deal with but you will get over it.
@sreeraj_9 (67)
• India
26 Jun 07
hi
yes it happened in my life but later i have took it cool manner when i saw the other with another married person
@warmweatherwoman (2233)
• Atlantic City, New Jersey
26 Jun 07
I am actually dealing with almost the same situation- only me and my friend were on and off for three years- we are just coming to the realization that we are better apart then we were together- but there are times when we both get weak and fall back on one another again. We actually just had a wonderful weekend in Philadelphia together- but things fell apart over something stupid as we ususally do, and now we aren't speaking again. We both know that his infidelity will keep us apart- but that doesn't stop the feelings that overcome me when he comes around. I am still completely in love with him- but I have come to the reality that I cannot be with him.
