Kind of lonely, but also lazy....are you like me?

if i am going to describe myself now, i would put your discussion on it. i am exactly what you are.. and i dont know why i am like yours.. is the a choice or its my destiny.. i dont know.. i dont care...

I am a lot like you. I often feel lonely and I do distance myself when meeting new people. It's not because I'm lazy though. It's because I've been hurt so many times in the past by friends either abandoning me or betraying me that I am really slow to trust new people. In the past, with pretty much every person I made friends with, I was the only one willing to put any effort into the friendship. It was always me calling the other person and me making the plans to get together. Then when I would stop calling the other person to see how long it would take for them to contact me, I would never hear from them again. So now I'm not willing to put that much effort in, I don't want to waste my time with people that don't really want to be my friends. I'll put in some effort and wait to see if the other person does as well. They usually never do. The only friend I have right now that puts in equal effort into the relationship is actually my b/f. He's the only one that really seems to care about me and the only one that sticks by me.