My Ex Refuses to take Daughter

I don't think that there is much that you can do on a legal note. On a more personal note I think I would explain to Cierra what a selfish person he is being. Be honest with her an let her know that it is nothing that hse has done and in no way is it her fault that he is now acting like a jerk. There are times when some people just don't think about what their actions will do to another person.

OUCH!!! What a horrible spot you are in. I agree with all the others. Reassuring her that this is not her fault is very important. What is really going to be tough is keeping the negative emotions about him hidden from the other kids. I can't imagine his reasons but there is no justification in hurting a 10 yr old whether she is his or not. And what about the grandparents? are they ok with this? did she lose them too? This is such a sad story.

If his name is not on the birth certificate as the father and if he didn't adopt her then there is nothing you can do about it. She is not his child in the eyes of the law. I think it would hurt very badly when something like this happens to your child but I don't think there is much you can do about it. Does she know her real father at all? Even knowing there is someone out there that loves her could help.

I have 3 kids by 3 different guys. My oldest child's father passed away when he was almost 5. My middle daughter was born without a father on the birth certificate. The father of my youngest has been in and out of prison for the last few years. He is the Godfather of my son and my oldest daughter is named after him. There has always been a closeness with him and the kids, but they don't get to see him because of his choices. Now I'm with a guy that loves all of them equally with no favoritism. Sometimes we have to go through some rough things with our kids, but it's better she learn now what kind of person he is. I think it's pretty dumb of him to put her off like that. He doesn't know what he is missing now, and he has no idea what he will be missing in the future. He was man enough to put his name down as her dad, doesn't he know that DNA is only a group of letters that define our genes??? DNA does NOT spell out who loves us and who doesn't. Tell him to grow up and take responsibility. Your little girl doesn't know what she needs to do to get Daddy to love her like the others. It's ridiculous that he does that to a little girl, and I think he's a coward. Anyone can make a baby, but it takes someone special to be a parent. It's too easy to say 'she's not mine', it's alot harder to say 'I love you and I can't wait to see you this weekend'. At least that's the way it seems to me.

Awe, Stacy is he still being a jerk about everything? I understand what you are going through. And poor Cierra, Reuben should explain to her why he is acting the way that he is. Morally he has an obligation to this child and her emotional well being. On the weekends that he takes the other children maybe you could make that a special weekend for Cierra. Let her have special time with her mom doing things she really likes to do. I know it won't make up for Reuben treating her this way but she will know that her mother really loves her.

I don't know exactly what to say, never had a child. But I think that the real dad has the biggest resposibility on the child than your ex? Its good that he gave his name to the child, and I think that you should be thankful. But the real dad has to support his child. Its the responsibility of the real father. And if I am the child, I want my real father not anyone else. If I am the child, I will be angry and sad that I have not known my real father. Every child wants a real dad not a substitute dad. I don't want a substitute dad. Do you?

In our country such things happen but very limited case. Ex generally do not want to take responsibility of another ex if ex has limited income. But if rich, no matter he gladly raise other dad's child. I think as matter of humanity your ex should accept Cierra as she is human and she has feeling, she has love in mind, she has grievance and joy. If 3 can can be raised more one child can be raised. If it happen to my daughter, I would not pardon the biological dad who is responsible to bring this innocent child in this world. I would take ravange to that ruddy guy whose character is lower than a beast, yes I would tell him beast who left their own child to the shoulder of another guy or woman.

Oh Wow. I can't imagine how I would have handled that situation. If he refused to take her from the start that would be one thing. It is just wrong to be there for her and then just drop out of her life basically. I'm sorry I have no advice to share. *hugs* to you and your daughter. How did she handle it by the way?

This has never happened to me.Iam shocked.He took Cierra on as his child.Just because you all divorced,doesn't mean he divorces her too.How devastating to the child when he told her to get out.And how cruel on his part.My first child's father left when he was 6 month's old and has had nothing do do with him.When I had my second son with another man and we split up and he would take my younger son out,most of the time he would take my older one too.When I got married and had a daughter,obviously my husband was marrying a family and I also became a step mother of an adult who had kids and lived far away.But,my husband treated my boys as an equal child,even though my boys were 16 and 13 when she was born.But,we all lived in the same house.And when his daughter came to stay up around here with her mother I babysat for her.Matter of fact,my youngest son was engaged to a girl that already had a daughter that was 3 and she had no connection with her father's side and I told her that she could call me grandma,I gave her birthday and other holiday present's.I would buy her clothes,toys,etc. just like any other grandparent would do for a grandchild.I took heer place's,babysat her,etc. and my son treated her like a daughter too.They are now broke up after having a daughter of their own.We would still treat her as a family member but her mother(my son's ex) will not let us.Does Cierra call him dad?How old is she? Is he the only dad she has know?Does she know her birth father?

I wouldn't really get into full detail about why he doesn't want to see her anymore with her. I'm guessing the new wife put this in his head. I would let her plan out what she wants to do. Go to the park, swimming, a theme park, zoo, etc. Let it be her day or weekend. Give her extra hugs and kisses.

well, honestly there isn't much that you can do. I would talk to your daughter and be honest with her. If she wants, I would encourage her to talk to your ex, and let him know how it makes her feel. If she doesn't want to talk about it, she could always write him a letter. He may be doing this in order to be vindictive to you, and may not realize how much he is hurting your daughter. If it turns out he is still a jerk about the whole thing, than at least she tried. I would take her to her grandfather's or uncles so she gets some extra special time with a good male role model in her life, who loves her. Maybe have a trip to the zoo, or somethng fun shceduled for the days that your ex will have the other children.

I agree he is being rude to her. That is wrong that he is doing that to her. Maybe he is not a good influence on her and maybe her real dad would want to be a apart of her life. Maybe you can found someone that is going to expect you and your kid. Then tell him that if he isnt going to take her that none of them can go. Make him suffer. It is not right that she cant go even through maybe you should have a long talk to her.

Best possible solution I think there is is to explain to Cierra what had happened. I suppose your ex means well when he said that to her and don't mean to hurt her.. I guess he just wanted her to see her biological father. However, if the case is the other way around and your ex is just being a jerk then might as well get your daughter Cierra and sit her down and tell her the situation, that your ex is just going through a phase right now and what is happening has nothing do with her and that she is still well-loved by you and everybody else around her... just comfort her in any way possible to boost up her spirits..

he is got to be ashamed of himself. You cant claim parenthood when u want and leave it when u dont want. its really bad on his part. If your daughter is old enough explain it to her. If she is not then schedule a outing with her at the same time. after 4-5 times she will look forward to your outing and forget having time with your ex. when she is old enough explain why u did it.