freaking kids
By mtoxales
@mtoxales (374)
Canada
July 3, 2007 11:01pm CST
I was in the grocery with my 3 kids when my youngest daughter who is 19-month old started crying. She wanted to be held but my hands are full so I let her cry because there was nothing else to do to comfort her. Then this old lady passed by and said "freaking kids". I got infuriated. I could not let it pass. I approached her and said "Excuse me, Ma'am. What did you just say?". And she changed what she said. She said "The kids are noisy and are a nuisance". I said "You said freaking kids". Then she kept quiet.
If she just said what she said that the kids are noisy, I would have accepted it because I know it was true somehow even it was only my daughter who was crying. But to say freaking kids, it was unacceptable for me.
This is the first time I confronted someone like that. I hated doing it because she was old but I couldn't allow it. Did I over-react? If someone said this to your child, would you get mad too?
10 responses
@wachit14 (3595)
• United States
5 Jul 07
Good for you for opening up your mouth. I wonder how she would feel is someone said in her presence "freaking old people".
Once when I was shopping without my kids, I spotted a mom who was having a very hard time with her toddler. Apparently, she grew very frustrated with him and was talking loudly, but not yelling. An older couple walked by and said in a loud voice "some people shouldn't have kids". They went on and on saying very judgmental things about her. Having children myself I could identify with her so I went over to the couple and said that I thought they should give her the benefit of the doubt and that maybe she was just having a bad day. They denied being judgmental of course, but maybe the next time they will keep their opinions to themselves.
1 person likes this
@mkirby624 (1598)
• United States
4 Jul 07
I would have gotten a little pissed that she said it that way as well.
Have you ever thought about including your daughter in the grocery shopping? Letting her hold something that's not breakable or something? Keep her occupied with some besides wanting to be held. Also, employ your other kids to get things for you, that way, if you need to pacify the younger one for a minute or two, your other two children will be safely engaged and something, and helping you at the same time! :)
1 person likes this
@mtoxales (374)
• Canada
4 Jul 07
Previously, my daughter does not cry so that I can hold her. I can give her something and she can get occupied. Currently, I think my daughter is undergoing emotional stress or something because her grandparents are with us now and once I left her with them for atmost an hour. After that, she cries when she does not see me. And when she sees me, she wants me to carry her.
I could take your idea on my other two kids helping me get grocery items. Thanks a lot for the reply.
@icequeen (2840)
• Canada
4 Jul 07
You had every right to approach her with her comments. She should have minded her own business. It is funny how we are suppossed to respect the elderly...but in my estimation some elderly are just down right rude and mean in some cases...which is not acceptable behaviour...
@chari_dc (492)
• Philippines
4 Jul 07
i too have kids who are oftentimes loud whenever we're out. i teach them good manners of course, but then i interpret their "loudness" as having self-confidence. it just shows that they are not shy to express how they feel.
as for the old lady, i agree with the previous reply here that just because she's older, she already has the right to be rude. i would've done the same thing you did if i were in the same situation. i wouldn't want my kids to think i couldn't stand up for them.
@foxyfire33 (10005)
• United States
4 Jul 07
I would have gotten mad too. I probably wouldn't have been brave enough to confront her but that's just me because I hate causing scenes. If you were fine confronting her then I say good for you! That was a rude thing for her to say. People in general need to be a little more understanding when it comes to babies and shopping.
"I hated doing it because she was old..." This is one statement that always bothers me. Rude is rude at any age. Would you have "felt better" if it had been a teenager? Probably, just because teenagers are stereotypically rude. But old people can be just as rude if not worse. Don't ever feel bad confronting a rude person. They usually deserve it no matter how old or young they are.
1 person likes this
@mtoxales (374)
• Canada
4 Jul 07
I could have stopped myself if she said something else that was not that rude because she is old. Older people indeed need to be respected but what she said was way too rude. Respect should be given to people who deserve it may they be young or old. Thanks for the reply.
@sunshine4 (8703)
• United States
4 Jul 07
You had every right to get upset with her saying that. Some people are so rude and disrespectful. I would have definitely said something too. It makes me so mad that some people think as parents we can control our kids emotions while in public. They get noisy and restless so people have to just learn to deal with it or ignore it. I probably would have said 'freaking old lady' right back to her.
1 person likes this
@tdbrower1969 (1242)
• United States
5 Jul 07
That is horrible! I would have done the same thing you did. I know that not all people are parents, but if you are not a parent I don't feel that you should say anything if you don't know what it is like to have children. All children act up from time to time in a store setting, and it's not like your kids are the only one to do that. I would have confronted her, too, simply because if you heard her, so did your children, and what kind of example does that set for them? How would you explain what the lady said about them? It is horrible that some people don't have the patience or tolerance to let things like this go by. I know we all have bad days, but don't take it out on children. I would have been just as mad as you.
@6in12years (305)
• United States
5 Jul 07
I usually let comments like that pass, but I might have said "I enjoy my daughter. I'm sorry she's disturbing you now."
@amaleigh73 (499)
• United States
5 Jul 07
I'm not a confrontational person, but that would have put me over the edge. She definitely crossed a line and I would have said something also. Either she never had children of her own or forgets how hard it is to be in that situation. I think we have all been there at one time or another and her rude comment did not help the situation any. On occasion, I have had people try to talk nicely to my child when they are upset like that and sometimes it works. . . sometimes not. I appreciate those people trying to help. Hopefully because you confronted her, she will think twice before doing that to another mom.
@jnallen_487 (800)
• United States
4 Jul 07
Well if she would have said something else then I would feel it was okay. But that's just mean to say freaking kids. I get irritated when I'm trying to shop and their are kids crying or screaming but I have a son so I can take it more than others with no kids. I think that you have to do whatever you think is necessary when it comes to your kids. If you thought that was necessary, then you did the right thing.
1 person likes this
@mtoxales (374)
• Canada
4 Jul 07
I thought it was necessary. I have heard comments that are not nice to hear but I usually let it pass with me being a shy and soft-spoken person. But what she said was terribly rude and I had to do something about it. I could not believe I did it. Thanks for the reply.
1 person likes this
