Manners are dead.
By RobinJ
@RobinJ (2501)
Canada
July 5, 2007 5:26pm CST
I was going downtown, to meet my daughter, and when I got off the bus, there was an elderly man sitting on his scooter. I tried to walk around him and he said "let me use your cell phone. I said I do not own one, He said my scooter is not working and so you have to push me up to McDonald's for me to get help. I told him I was not going to push him up the hill to McDonald's. He looked at me and said well you can not leave me stranded here. So I asked him what he expected me to do? I already told you push me up to McDonald's.
So I said if you had asked politely and said please, I would phone some one to help you, but you just demand, and I do not feel obligated to do any thing for you, So he swore at me, and I left. Did I sink down to his level. in being rude, I honestly could have not pushed that scooter up the hill like he wanted, I could have very easily go and used the pay phone to get assistance if he had asked.
7 people like this
19 responses
@Ejobsuccess (895)
• United States
6 Jul 07
Haa i think this is hilarous. I mean people expect everything. I work in a doctors office and i think its really sad how people really depend on others and really think that people have to help each other. I would have done the same thing. There is a women who is in a motor powered wheelchair and is paralysed i believe from a stroke and well she always comes alone. This women has tons of equipment she has to take off for her appointment. Its sad too because once i went outside to get some lunch and seen her sitting outside the door waiting for someone to open it for her. People she can barely talk and move, what a prey for any human preditor.
@RobinJ (2501)
• Canada
7 Jul 07
See thats what I am so afraid of is this exact thing happening,are we so close to losing our humanity that some poor woman who should not ever be left alone, but obviously is, left to wait until some one comes along to open a door.That one I can understand and have empathy for I would hate to be in a position where I am left to fend for myself. as I am already half way down that road already. I am a person who will stop and open doors and get help if necessary, but in my case the man was so rude and demanding, I felt no obligation to give in to his demands. I don't know maybe I should have gone for help.
@herrbaggs (1308)
• United States
18 Jul 07
After reading your encounter, I have some bad news. we could possibly be related. There is one difference, I would have pushed him to the top of the hill then let him roll back down.
1 person likes this
@lucy02 (5015)
• United States
6 Jul 07
People amaze me sometimes. It reminds me of the time I came out of a convenience store and this man was walking in. He yelled at me to wait until he got out and give him a ride home. I don't know the man. I sat there like a fool for a minute and then it hit me that I didn't have to wait on him and shouldn't, so I left.
@makingpots (11915)
• United States
6 Jul 07
I think you responded as many people would have. Sinking to his level would have been swearing back at him when he swore at you. You at least defended your position and told him exactly why it is you didn't feel obligated to help him. That is more than a lot of people would have done.
Sorry this happened to you. When will people learn the meaning of the old addage 'you attract a lot more flies with honey than with vinegar' ?
1 person likes this
@eachen2002 (889)
• United States
6 Jul 07
I run into alot of rude people these days.I think it's becoming an epidemic or something.No matter how I try I always seem to find that one in every crowd.
1 person likes this
@TheCatzMeow1 (579)
• United States
6 Jul 07
How rude! He deserved a little talking to about his manners and asking for your help in the wrong way. I don't think you stooped to his level. He's lucky that's all you said. I guess he was cranky about his situation, but that wasn't your fault.
1 person likes this
@Katlady2 (9904)
• United States
6 Jul 07
How rude! That guy sounded absolutely ghastly! Hon you had way more restraint than I could have had. I wouldn't have been so polite to the jerk. He's lucky he didn't get clocked upside the head with your purse! It sounds like he has the "pity me" attitude along with a healthy (or unhealthy) dose of anger to go with it.
1 person likes this
@abbey19 (3106)
• Gold Coast, Australia
6 Jul 07
No Robin, you definitely did not sink down to his level by refusing to push him up the hill to McDonald's - and with his attitude, I would have refused to. It doesn't cost anything to say please or thankyou; there is no reason to be rude the way he was. To cap it all, he swore at you as well! He didn't deserve your help. I hope he finds his manners because he is of the generation who should know better.
@beablessing (38)
• Philippines
6 Jul 07
I have been working with children and it is sad to note that most of the kids nowadays don't have good manners. These children are from the C and D classes and I figured it out that they lack good manners because their parents didn't teach them or the parents themselves don't have good manners.
I also have noticed that kids studying in private schools have more good manners than children studying in public schools.
1 person likes this
@totty1969 (1468)
• United States
6 Jul 07
Hello RobinJ,
See now this man did it all wrong. He should have asked for assistance, not demand it. Please goes along way, tons of things can get done with the word Please. What was he thinking anyway? I think if I were an elderly man, I would ask a young man to push me up the hill. I really don't think I would have asked for a push, I would have asked for a phone or for someone to call for me. I say what nerve... this guy needs refresher course in manners 101.
Peace, Totty
1 person likes this
@golfproo (1839)
• Canada
6 Jul 07
No...I do not think you were rude at all and did not sink to his level. He was being rude and demanding and bordering on abusive. You did the right thing. Maybe he will have learned his lesson and the next time he decides to ask somebody for help he is polite and kind about it. If that is the case...then you helped him more than you know. :)
cheers,
@JhiLLiCiOus (8)
• Philippines
6 Jul 07
..good you did not help that man..!!! that was a very big insult on him..and a huge shame as well.. manners like that are not supposed to be tolerated..if he was being rude, then he should have find someone who is worse than him..!!!
@seabeauty (1480)
• United States
6 Jul 07
Being that he was born at a time when people supposedly had manners, he should have known better.
I wouldn't have helped him if he paid me to with an attitude like that.
1 person likes this
@Kalachia (230)
• United States
6 Jul 07
I would have told the man the same thing. Manners don't mean anything anymore, and the way you went about the situation was as polite as you needed to be. It shows how crappy the world has gotten while we've been focusing on things that don't necessarily need to be focused on. Manners are a great thing to have, and I'm glad to say that I have plenty.
1 person likes this
@maddysmommy (16230)
• United States
8 Jul 07
Umm what a not so nice way to ask? I would of done the same thing you did or similar. I would of emphasized to him, umm a "please" would go a long way you know! I have lower back problems so I may not have been able to help him out, but I would of found someone to help him if he spoke to me politely!
@munhozmib (3836)
• Sao Paulo, Brazil
6 Jul 07
Hello, Mrs. Robin. Nowadays, there are some people who just think you have to do what they order you... They confuse respect with obedience, and they think you must obey whatever they say. This is an absolutely wrong concept, and you did the right thing not doing what he ordered you to do. I doubt he would say "Thank You", if you pushed him up to McDonald's.
There was no problem on being rude with him. He deserved it, and in my opinion what you did is correct. If he said "Please" things would be quite different, huh?
1 person likes this
@raychill (6525)
• United States
6 Jul 07
It amazes me on basically a daily basis how often I come across ridiculously rude people. I wonder what happened to manners. How is it that we became such rude creatures? Were they always like that? Did something hit them recently to make them that way?
That's ridiculous and I definitely wouldn't have engaged in a conversation with the man from the beginning, so you're nicer than I would have been in that situation.
1 person likes this
