Do All Mothers Really Understand Their Daughters?

Ithink you should try to talk to your mother and explain to ther in a nice way. I have a daughter too and she is already in college I know she never lied to me and sometimes If we had an argue of some matters I just tell her I do the best for her but she refuse to do my advise it's up to her and take the responsibilities of what will happened to her. And after that she will be in silence like shes thinking what I'm trying to say. Then she will say sorry to me. I know sometimes explaining is the best to understand why we not want you to do that kind of thing.

I think you are very normal to feel the way you do. Children often go through stages where they are hesitant to move on to the next phase of their lives. That's why babies have a hard time giving up their bottles before they become toddlers and why children have a hard time giving up their stuffed animals before they become teenagers. You are embarking on the next phase of your life and you want to hang on to those things that made you feel good about yourself. There's no harm in that. College is stressful and the future is always uncertain. Keep your old friends close,as they will always ground you. I have a son who will begin college in the fall and he is excited by scared at the same time. Growing up is a process that goes well into your twenties. So do what you have to do to get keep moving towards the future. If that means you want to re-visit the past every once in a while, then there is no harm in that and please just know that you are not alone.

hmmm.. i don't think there is a need for you to really get depressed at all. there are times when moms think they do understand everything about their daughters when truth is, not all things are understandable to them. we just have to respect them and let them be. moms are like that all the time. all you need to do is try to talk to your mom. it is always the best solution ever in this world... talking things through together. so, go ahead and have a talk with her. and one day, she will surely understand you.. anne

hey, you are just like me and my mom. Nothing that i can say. well, you are must be Philippines right?If i am wrong, then I am sorry. Asian mother usually take control over the children. Most of your responds here are talking and explain to her... but how? she will say you are talking back to her... and can you tell me what are you going to say next? we are different from them and mom is always top of the line and in charge here. she just try the best for you and try to protect you all the time, but those action are not working all the time. I was so tired of what my mom has to tell me what to do and what not to do. I grow up now and i am not 16 any more, but she still think that I am still a little baby that can't think and decide what to do yet. here what you can do, listen to what you mom say and dont talk back to her... let her do what she has to do. but when she calm down and then you have to get sometime to get your story into it. make a joke about something and then bring your stuff in and see what she is going to say about that. Then tell her how you feel about your old friends and your new friends. You have to share with her from past to present and then she will realize that you are a young any more and you need to be friends sometimes. She is old enough to understand you and dont be afraid to say it, be open to her... I think your mom doesn't like you to be around with people that are worthless for you. She doesn't understand how friendship work... but this what my mom thinks, she said they are nothing to me and I have to move on and dont be around with them... wasting your time... i was like what? but i didn't say anything but I just let it go.So, you have to understand her and i hope she understand you too...

hello...!! dont get depressed.... talk to ur mom gently as much as u can....and also try to keep her as calm as u can cuz if both with shout or dwell upon it then u cannot resolve ur problem.... try to explain her tht frnds r really imp ....and u just want to meet them once in a blue moon which is not tht bad......after all she is ur mom and i know ifboth of u will handle this siuation nicely and relaxed u will over come ur prob.... :-)

hmm... i do not feel there is any harm in visiting your old school. Also i am a little surprised by what your mom has to say. No one can, forget his/her past, it was a part of your life, be it the good time you spent or a not so good time. Are you sure there is no other reason your mom's telling this for...cause there could be ..maybe she's doesn't like the friends you used to hangout in school or something.. i don't knoe .. something to do with your past that your mom does not want you to go back to. If not then its a little wierd for your mom to say so.

Ok, you are 18 and trying to figure out how to become an adult. Remember when you were 13 and figured, hey, I'm old enough to date and the arguements the ensued then. It seems that Mother & daughters battle between 13 and 22. Daughters go through fazes of ...oh, she just doesn't understand, to she doesn't love me...Kayla's Mom lets her.... (stop me if any of this sounds familier.) Truth of the matter is, no, parents do not 100% of the time understand their children. We are working our way through raising our children the best we can. What we do have, that you have not experienced yet is life experience. As a parent, we try to push & mold you into the person that we hope for you to become. We have learned from our past mistakes and try desperately to impart that wisdom onto our children so that they do not have to experience the same agony and heartbreak that we endured. As far as visiting your old high school, I find nothing wrong with visiting your old friends and teachers. By the time you are 20, this will no longer be your comfort zone and you will no longer have the need or desire to visit the school. Be smart and have friends from college and high school and find a way to blend all of your chums together. The main goal is for you to mature into a bright, respectable & reliable adult that is self sufficient. Believe it or not, once you are out of college and living in your own space, the battles with your Mother will lessen as she discovers your beauty as a young woman standing on her own 2 feet. Take the battles in stride and never forget that she has undying love & admiration for you.

I tbink your mom just doesnt like the idea that you have to go back to your school without any important business or something that you will do there. I think in other way you should understand her, she has so many things in her mind. Maybe problems that are not as small things that you have.

Im still in highschool and I usually go to my mom when Im upset and I trust her advice because she has already been through it all. But my mom always tells me not to worry about things, becuase she realized that when she grew up they didnt matter. And thats what bugs me!!! Right now, everything feels like a huge deal, I know in a few years it wont matter, but I gotta live through the things first to realize that it was no big deal. I dont think its wrong for you to want to visit your old school, heck, people at my school do that all the time. If your friends are still in higschool, it doesnt mean that when you visit your trying to go back to your old life, your just there for a visit. I think your mom needs to realize that your not dwelling on the past, but your not going to forget the past four years like they never happened. Im not exactly sure why your mom gets pissed that you visit there, I think she may be a bit stubborn. Was there any past problems you had in school that affected you? Cause that could be a reason why she wants you to move on.

Perhaps your mom doesn't understand your motives for visiting the school. If she won't listen to your words, then you may need to explain some other way. Write a letter to your mom explaining why you feel it's important to revisit your old friends from high school. I am sure that when she reads your hearts intent on paper she will give you a big hug and the support that you truly need. She will realize that you are simply looking for some loving support and familiar faces. College is a big transition for most people and very scary at times, especially if you are alone. Don't be afraid to reach out for support. Remember your My Lot friends support you too. Be well, my friend and prosper!

Being a mother of 2 teenage daughters I think 99% mothers do understand their daughters but dont want them heading in the wrong direction or been infulenced by anyone. I think your mum might be worried that trouble might end up finding you at the mall. Surely you have better things to do with your time. Your mum only wants what is best for you and to get a good education, surley thats not to much for a mum to ask. Communication is the key open up and talk to your mum.

Yeah, they are. But other Mothers won't express their feelings open to her daughters. They keep it inside. All they want for their daughters is the best things that they can offer. They can be easily lean on during in times of problems. Mothers can relate well to their daughters.

Maybe you should write down your feelings,and show them to your mom.I think it can work:)

I don't think mothers could really understand their daughters.Though mothers always think they know what their daughters's thoughts,they don't know their daughters actually!

I don't really understand why your mom would care unless its that she wants you to spend more time with her. My mom has always been that way too. There is no reason to be depressed. Just tell her you love her and go. Then spend as much time with her as you can.

No they don't. They trie, a good mother does, but she often fails. Really understanding other people is confronting. Letting go is very difficult. No mum wants her daughter to suffer. If your mum reacts like she does maybe it's because it worked for her. Maybe she left the past behind, and she cannot imagine that it works for you differently or it might even make her insecure, thinking, I wish I had a place to go back to. The best way to find out is asking, not defending yourself or quarrel. But trie to listen and find out shy she worries. I don't have a daughter, but I am one.

I think the general problem is a lot of parents get disconnected from there children somehow and then there is some loss of communication. I think it is a generation gap thing. The parents fail to understand that their children are not exactly them and that they are totally different people. They are from a different generation all together and therefore they have a different a view and approach to things.

I have a mother who never really gave a crap about me. I was and still am the black sheep of the family to her. Why? I don't know. I grew up with 5 other siblings, 4 boys, 1 girl (my sister who is 19 now). My mom always treated my brothers decent and my sister when she was younger decent, but me, she just doesn't like me. I am the only one out of my siblings that has kids, my mom has nothing to do with them. She doesn't get them anything for their b-days (not even a card), nothing for Christmas, she doesn't spend time with them. When we come to visit, she locks herself in her bedroom. Now that all of us kids are older, she is crappy to all of us, as well as our father. IT's a very sad situation. So if you have a mother that shows you love, I am so glad for anyone whom has a mother like this.

I have 4 daughters and they have all at one time or another cried" oh, you just cant possibly understand!" Admittedly, sometimes I really do not. I really do not understand your mom's problem with you revisiting friends from highschool. perhaps they were the kids that you got into trouble with? One of my girls tended to migrate with friends that she without fail always got into trouble with. In saying that, I am not blaming them. She was one of them. When she first began getting her life on track, I was so thrilled!! At first, quite often, when she would reunite with her old pals, they did resort to old behavior. It wasn't that I disliked any of her friends. As a group they just all made poor choices and as her mom, I just wanted to see her do well for herself. Gradually they all grew up. The ones she chooses to hang with also grew up and all lead responsible lives. The ones that stayed stuck at 18 she has little to do with now. Hang in there. I was never my girls # 1 fan during these years. Its as hard to be a mom as it is to be a daughter. You are fighting for your independence while we are here just missing you and hoping for the best in your life. It all balances out in the end. Visit your friends and reassure your mom that you love her. Don't take her apprehensions to heart. she just loves you. Hug her, follow your heart and do what you know is right and this will all work out.