He wants to get married...they have only known each other 3 weeks...

Right i notice that i am pretty much alone on this one. But as far as i am concerned there aint much you can do to make this youn couple change their minds, and honestly i dont think you should try it either. you have every right as a parent to have your concerns for wether this aint going a little too quick, but from what you tell about you son he is 26 years of age and not exactly a imature or irresponsible son. If this is how he feels you should not stand in his way, though i do appreciate that you have not yet finished grieving from the loss of your mum. But honestly why should your sons happyness stop you grieving for your mum? I obviously do not know when your mum passed away, but actually i think that you sharring your sons happyness and happy day with you may just be what you need to move on yourself, i dont know. But one thing is for sure, if the young couple have made up their mind and you try to make them think it all over and give it a little more time, you will risk pushing the both away from you, in worse case loose them both. Why dont you see past yourself and share the happyness with your son, it will bring you closer to both of them than doing the oposite. Though it may not look like it from this response, i do as a parent myself understand your concerns. But if they made up their mind there is nothing you can do to stop it anyway. They will just have to go for it and give it their best shoot. There is no guaranties in life and waiting for some time does not mean that their marriage will be safer with regards if it will hold. I hope for you that you will find peace in your heart to allow the young couple to go ahead, enjoy the happyness and the day of your sons life with him. Worrying is not doing anybody any good. All the best, hope things will work out ok for all of you. :)

Hi Tina, your son sounds like my husband when he fell in love with me after only meeting once in person. It took us more than two years to tie the knot only because I was not ready and he was from the get go. I think it is too soon but I am not him nor her so I can't really say. Even though you all have talked about it and showed lots of concern regarding their urgency to get married, it seems like they so much want to be together. You know, if you can see the happiness in his eyes, the way she makes him feel with they are together, the way he takes care of her son, I think you should let him decide and be there to show your support. Who knows if it will work, only they will know, and if doesn't, then I hope you will be there for him if that ever happens. I hope I haven't said anything to hurt you, I know you have gone through a lot and probably surprised this is all happening now. Hugs Tina - it's a lot to take one!

Oh dear three weeks is such a short time, I am one that believes that people should live together for awhile before they make a permanent union, women are so independent these days and I think having two independent people together is not easy, people have to get used to each other, well I hope if he goes through with it I hope it works for him, it can and does so I guess all I can say is think positive.

first i would like to say i am very sorry for the loss of your mom it is a very hard thing to go thru as i have lost both of my parents....but as for your son be happy for him and let him know you will be there for him if he needs you.. it sounds to me as if they both have their heads on straight an are both going in the right direction i mean how many kids today do you know that can have an honest conversation with each other let alone their parents so a big kudos to them for being able to discuss this with all of you honestly.. i am not a big supporter of living together before marriage .. my parents didnt and their marriage lasted 33 years my first husband and i lived together before marriage and it lasted 13 years and they werent good ones... it sounds to me as if your son has fallen for this girl and they may very well end up in a lifetime relationship i believe in love at first site i want to wish them well and hope they live a long and happy life together

i think he is just confused and getting ahead of hisself..i think it's too soon to get married for just knowing a person for 3 weeks..he is just getting confused of his feelings and rushing a marriage is not a good idea..everybody says they never felt that way before when they are inlove..i tell that myself..but only to find out i felt the same thing before..they can get a substitute of marriage by living in first..then after a year or so then decide if still wants to get married..spending time and money for marriage is not a joke to think they are committing to lifetime..3 weeks is not enough for them to know each other well..what if instances comes when they cannot understand each other anymore and found out of their differences..should that mean they will separate and get diborce? its possible you know.. i hope your son will think about this..i have seen so much relationship that was put to trash after several months because they rush their selves to marriage because they thought they are feeling the right thing.

Most people go through life without ever really falling in love or without finding the peson whom they really want to be with, he's lucky to be even feeling the way he is, give them your blessing to go through with it. What if he was wrong about his feelings? Well he's old enough to take whatever pain may follow and he would surely learn because of it. Eitherway you must not interfere, that's the worst mistake a parent can make. Pray for them, help them make it work, but for the sake of your relationship with him- don't try to stop what is coming.

Yes it's very quick and the whole "marry in haste repent at leisure" thing might happen but there again some people marry after knowing each other for years and it still doesn't work out! Who can say what might happen - maybe they're just perfect for each other. He is 26 so he's old enough to know his own mind I guess. I would just wish them well and hope it works out for them.

Hmmm this is a difficult situation because if you voice your concerns or put your foot down, I realize your son is old enough to make his own decisions in life then that may put a rift in your relationship with your son, he has to do what he seems fit and sadly you have to accept his decision either way but if it does fall through you need to be there for him. I'm hoping it doesn't and I am the last one to ask advice for when it comes to true love because I don't believe in it. But as long as you are supportive which I know you are my good friend, by all means voice your concerns but at the end of the day he has made his choice and you never know it might be the greatest romance and success story.

Whoa!!!!! wants to be married with the girl he just met 3 weeks ago.....well that's something. Might be true love at first sight?! Well, that's life. But guide your son and ask him if he is sure about this marrying a girl he just met 3 weeks ago. Hey hey, that's too short for a lifetime commitment. Analyze the situation and let your son reasoned out to you regarding the matter. Just be always at his side 'coz this is a lifetime commitment and there is no turning back.

you know tina, i hear what you are saying. as a mother i would have concerns if my son came to me and said he wants to get married after only knowing a young lady after just three weeks. but you said more then once that he is a good guy, he is a smart young man. i would have to just support my son and stand by the fact that this is something that he wants to do. you don't know it just might work and be a great wonderful relationship. just know that as you said your son is a good man with a good head on his shoulders, so just know he is making the right choice for him. i know you are still hurting from your moms passing, but now you are about to have a new daughter and grandson. just be blessed.

Okay will maybe there are two questions.. Is this the two quick no stick situation in a relationship? Is this the women I want to spend the rest of my life with? Maybe ask a few questions to help him really think those two questions through? You know your son best. Do you think he is being honest with himself when answering those questions. If so then trust him. Lets not paint every relationship with the same colored brush! Is it possible he is one of those very lucky people who is being blessed with those once in a life time gifts of meeting there soul mate and knowing it right of the bat. Could be! What about all those wonderful stories you hear about the couples who married in with in a week of meeting each other and lived 60 or 70 wonderful years together before one passed away. Those stories have to happen to somebody so why not your son. I say if you do not have that check and warning signs in your spirit then be happy for them? Yes many people out there make mistakes but those people make mistakes after years of dating each other and or living together before marriage. There are no real guarantees I guess! My uncle met his wife and gave her a ring 4 days later! They have been married 25 years and going strong! This was a couple on one of those talk shows who married on this first date and they were now 90 or something like that.They claimed to have a wonderful marriage and were still as much in love. So really just fish around a bit and if you don't have no bad warning signs just be happy with your son. Also don't let those warning signs be todays satistics they don't count!

Well.. as your son says that 'he has never felt this way with anybody else'... she might have been the one destined for him. Or that is what I would love to think it as. It's not that all quick marriages end up broken. My marriage was an arranged one(our parents fixed it). My husband and I spoke on the telephone was about 3 weeks and that was it. We actually met each other just 8 days before our marriage. And I must say that I am lucky to have found a husband like him (hope he thinks the same way about me too lol). It depends on how much each person is ready to adjust and respect the other's feelings and stay within the tolerance line. If both of them are people that can communicate and love each other, I don't see a reason why their marriage should not work. I wish them a wonderful blissful married life ahead, and a peaceful life with lovely little grandchildren for you.

I bet your son is a good and wonderful young man and I am sure the woman who have him will be so lucky. Actually there are cases that two kinda people fall in live and decide to get married and I can say some of them work out. And not few that doesnt. Why dont you ask your son to postpone the marriage think and have some times to look and make sure that he is really ready for this. You can make sure to him that love always feel like that at the first time cause you will never can know people so well in that kinda short time.

according to my point of view there's nothin wrong in getting married fast since if u love each other than nothing matters so if i were in ur shoes i would go for it and goooooooood luck

I think you are doing the best thing by being supportive. Its time for him to make his own mistakes. By being supportive you are telling him you trust his judgement and respect hisright to make decisions on his own. Don't view this as a failure on your part. Just trust.

Well this is a lot to take in, that being said. It appears they are going to go through with it regardless, of what you or any one thinks, So I would wish them the best. They will be starting off with a bit more difficulty because they do not know each other, and if they can get past all the small details that normally drive other people up the wall, then they have a chance. No one can read another's mind and know the reason Why. all we can do is hold on and try to survive the ride. I truly do wish them all the best. You never know the odds are beat a lot , And with every marriage only having a 50/50 chance to begin with Who knows. It is just costly, in spirit, money and life.

Oh,Tina I would be very careful if I were your son.three weeks isn't really enough time to really get to know a person. How does he know it's not an infatuation. Marriage is supposed to be a lifetime committment and there is no need to rush. What if he were to get married then they start having problems. I hope he isn't making a big mistake.Di you tell him that marrriage is something that shouldn't be rushed?

I agree that 3 weeks is very quick, not enough time to really know everything about a person. Let's just say I wouldn't do such a thing. Unfortunately at his age of 26 he can already make his own decisions without your consent. What's important is that you've told him your concerns. If he really wants to take the risk, then there's not much else you can do but hope for the best. Let him face whatever consequences there will be.

well, in this case I suppose you must show your son, you love him and while you disagree with his decision you will support him. Let him make his own mistakes, which can be extremely hard as a parent, I know, but be there for him, and maybe it will work out. I moved in with my guy 3 months after meeting him, and I was just turning 18, we have been together 6 years and have two children and one on the way, you never know it could work,. if it doesnt again, just be there to support him and try not to say I told you so... =)

oh dear you must be devastated, well if he were my son i would also be worried but you will never know maybe he has fallen in love for real but you should check on the woman's past before allowing her in your son's life. and I am sorry about your mom. cheers