Break up after 5 years. I'm having a hard time.

I am sorry to hear both of you break off after 5 years together. It is indeed a sad thing. I understand the pain as I have been through it. Personally, I feel that in a relationship, there is no such thing as "was supposed". Perhaps it might be better now than later since the relationship cannot be tested. I know 5 years is not a short time, but the pain might be longer if later. Give yourself a cooling period. Grief if you need to. However, since you are busy with studies, I presume you can channel the sadness into your studies and focus on achieving what you strive to. It could be a blessing in disguise. Perhaps there are better guys coming along. Have faith in yourself. Time will heal. Wish you all the best. God bless.

I am sorry to learn of your break-up, it is very hard especially after being together after 5 years together. The same thing happened to me many years ago, after about the same length of time - I didn't know what day of the week it was. But you do get over it.. Hang in there :-)

Give it a very very good cry and get it all out then think what you want for your future so to clear your head so you can go on with your studies. I would say he is selfish and wanted more attention than you could give him at this time and it might be for the best that he did this as he seems not the one for your future Hugs and good luck Blessing

Break up after 5 years.yes its really tough to digest when such a long term relationship ends.Since you seem to be a student i would suggest you to concentrate your studies and hope your boyfriend understands you and come back to you after some time.

I wish I could help. It's a hard situation to deal with. I know whenever I've been involved in a break-up I tend to like to be alone and then after a while I take comfort in the company of my friends and it always takes a while to be able to get out there and go back to dating again. Especially after such a long relationship. It's easier for people to say "well if he couldn't this or that or many other things than you can do better" but it's not so easy to accept it. Like I said before I wish there was something I could say or do to help but I think the best advice is to just deal with it on your own terms and you'll eventually come to grips with the situation and be able to move on. I hope you do!

Im sorry to hear this. I dated a female for just about 5 years also. I got her to join the military, and she went to basic training and came back with another guy. needless to say, we broke up. They got married shortly after that and a week after the wedding, he went to Iraq. When he got home he admitted to him that he was sleeping with another female the whole time he was there. now they are divorced. We are still friends but i always wonder "what if." here we are years later, and i am engauged to the smartest most beautiful female i have ever met. Lately we have been having problems, and in jeopardy of breaking up, but its slowly but surely getting better. All i can say is to make sure that you have support. dont be affraid to cry, and make sure you keep your head up. thats the most important of all. KEEP YOUR HEAD UP. things will get better, i promise. Mr. Right will come along when the time is right.

oh dear, i'm very sorry to hear that. after five years of relationship and then would end just like that.. anyway, just don't let it affect your studies.. maybe, you're not meant to be.. there's a reason in everything that happens to us ans i'm sure God has his reason why he let it be this way.. there are so many guys there. he's not just the one. he oesn't deserve your love.. just go on, don't let anybody or something affect you.. it's not your lost anyway... but for now, if you feel like crying, then cry.. let it all out.. and then after that crying, you'll feel better and life must go on.. IF YOU LOVE SOMEONE, SET HIM FREE. IF HE COMES BACK, HE'S YOURS BUT IF NOT. IT'S NOT MEANT TO BE..... take it easy dear.... just pray and you'll see.....

Life has to go on my dear. If he comes back, then perhaps he is really for you, if not then, its his loss not yours. You are still young and I am pretty sure that better and grander things are in store for you. So lift that pretty chin up and face the world with a smile.

Awww argie, I'm sorry to hear about your recent break up. I can feel for you. Love can play havoc on our tender heart at a situation like this. I hope you can be able to channel your energy toward your studies. Holler all your friends if you can and make sure to get involve in some of your school's activities. Your pain will eventually subside and only time can tell.

Oh, sweetheart, I wish I could give you a big hug! I know it won't mean much now, but you will come to understand that he was not good enough for you. Usually if a guy can just walk away after being together for so long, there is an ulterior motive. Just pamper yourself for awhile-give yourself a chance to heal. Then pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and move on to bigger and better things. Take care.

Dear friend,even i break up after a healthy relation of 4 long years,i had alwez been beside him but he turned out to be unfaithful and pointed a finger that am unfaithful.I know its pretty tough to forget the person you love the most,cause I have myself felt the same way.But still i would tell you engros yourself in the other aspects of the world especially your studies.Take Care.

You must not let it affect your studies. Focus on what is more important, your studies. If you are really meant for each other then no matter what happens you would still be together in the end. But I strongly recommend that you should stop thinking about it, I understand that it would be very hard for you to do that because you're thinking of the time you have been together has just been wasted. But put in mind that it's not your loss but his loss! You are really pretty (I hope my wife won't kill me) and there are lots of guys that would easily fall inlove with you.

oh, I feel so bad for you already. well, if he is your real boyfriend then he should know and understand you. I know, relationship is working when you both spend sometimes together. However, if you dont have much time then you two should talk about it. have he ever talk to you about this? or just break up right the way? Do you see he changed a little bit before this happened? If so, then he might meets someone else. It takes a while for you to deal with this, but you are not alone... you have to be strong and stand up. Do what you have to do now, study is very important to you and you can't quit cuz of this problem. Of course it pain but what can do you? if he gone already. He will be regret when he lose you. Like me and my boyfriend (he is not my husband). we lived far away from each other and we never have time to go out either... the time that I can spent with him was talking on the phone with him for an hour, and that's it. We kept doing this for 3 years and then we finally be together. Hey,nothing mean more than you two are understanding each other... I am so sorry to hear that but you have to think all over again, nothing is too late for you.... take as much time you have now to forget him and take time to bring yourself up again. Nothing is too later for you... I wish you all the best

that is so sad. you are my friend and deserve better. i go and slap his face with big smelly wet kipper. he no make you unhappy. i have never had girl partner. you find someone better and i save my money and buy pretty bride.

Certain amount of pain is natural and expected after a break up. The intensity will vary upon the period for which the two were together and the sensitivity of the mind. Time does heal such things more often that not, but if this break up hasn't been a mutual decision then you will have to talk with your boyfriend about things that went wrong and possibilities of a patch up. Chances are that you may change some of your habits and get back together. If that isn't possible, then just take some time my friend, time does heal these kind of things.

Sorry to listen about that. Breakdown of relations is not really good for the health of anyone. Unexpected things do happen. That is the name of the game. That is life. One should not get discouraged. What about those who lose their loved ones accidentally. I think one should not get too deeply involved. One should always keep some reservations in order to face sudden negative developments. Well clock cannot be turned back. One should move on.

We did miss you and welcome back. Trust me on this, Argie, no man who puts "conditions" on getting back together is worth wasting your time on. With all respect to you and the choices you have made, this boy sounds very immature. Often it does take boys longer to become mature in the areas that count -- like being responsible in a relationship, for example. What you learn from your studies will serve you faithfully forever, but boys come and go. It seems very difficult now, but it might help to remember something the wise older women used to tell young girls when I was your age: "There are lots of other fish in the sea!" Soon you will meet someone new who is less selfish and will treat you better. It is sometimes possible for young people to fall into true love, but mostly the hormones run ahead of the brains, so it is best to wait a while before giving your heart away. I promise you this: one day you will look back and wonder what you ever saw in this fellow.

I'm in the same position as you are. My gf for 2 years and 6 months and I broke up last sunday. I am a law student so I have to study everyday. What I did was to allocate a certain time of the day like before sleeping or after going home from school, to think about it. At first, of course it is difficult. Time is the only real solution... Good luck to you and God Bless...

Hi there, I know how you must be feeling at the moment as I had been in a similar situation, I had been in a relationship for 7-8 years with my kids dad, and he was meant to be someone I could turn to when I needed a hand, but he was never there, he was always out with who knows.. I was in a bad state for awhile, but as time went by I learnt to deal with the situation and was able to move on because of the love and support I got from my family and friends....

Five years is a long time, you can't be blamed for feeling the way you do nor is there a quick remedy that will make all the unpleasantness go away... You just have to hang on Lori(that's your name right? I saw it in one of the responders.). An abrupt end after five years, I guess that just screams not meant to be. Anyway concentrate on your studies and your friends, it will help take your mind off him.. Don't worry somebody else will knock on your door soon and he'll be bringing flowers.