do you still smile even if you dont feel like it?
By secretbear
@secretbear (19448)
Philippines
July 16, 2007 5:32am CST
it really sucks when i come to a point that i feel so bad, irritated, not in the mood, problematic, angry at something... and still, i have to force a smile.
just like today, i wasnt in the mood and i feel like criticizing every body in my head and it felt like i was annoyed with something and i just cant pinpoint it... but out of politeness and respect to others, i have to smile and be nice to everybody.
i have to smile at the person who made me wait before she gives what im asking for.
i have to smile at the person who really irritated me because he messed with my newspaper.
i have to smile at the person who was indiscreetly saying that we have to practice our presentation and she was still suggesting her corny idea. ^__^;;
i was not really in the mood today and i really didnt feel like being bright, happy and friendly but still, i had to be polite and smile at everyone. coz its a sin here to be a snob and raise an eyebrow to someone. you do that and you start people to talk behind you and stab your back. and before you know it, everybody doesnt like you anymore. ^.^;;
sometimes, its really hard to be polite and nice and smile. but its the proper decorum and we just have to obey it to avoid misunderstandings. but i do felt bad because it got me cursing all these people in my head even if they didnt really do something bad against me. ^__^;; *sigh* life.
do you still smile even if you dont feel like it??
4 people like this
39 responses
@secretbear (19448)
• Philippines
18 Jul 07
that's a good habit, I think. ^__^;; coz a smile lights up the face and lightens up the atmosphere. but be careful, someone might see you smiling by yourself and they might think you're crazy! LOL
@secretbear (19448)
• Philippines
19 Jul 07
i think so. come to think of it, when someone sees me smiling to myself and approached me and asked me what im smiling about, i'd just laugh and tell them nothing. ^__^
@recycledgoth (9894)
•
16 Jul 07
I have always tried to hide behind a smile even when I feel like killing someone :-) It is hard to do sometimes, especially when i really don't feel particular cheerful but at least with a smile on my face I can cope with problems. I have a T shirt which says *I'm smiling becuase I know where the bodies are buried* and that just sums it all up for me hun
@secretbear (19448)
• Philippines
17 Jul 07
hahaha! i would like to have a tshirt like that! that would scare those who plan to piss me. ^__^
its really hard to smile when you're mad at someone and you just have to hide coz you know it wont bring any good if you burst it out. but i guess i've been doing this for a long time that i think im good at it. LOL its all about practice. LOL and it becomes more challenging if that person continues to talk to you and without a clue, he's annoying you. like he's out of this world and he doesnt know how to be sensitive of a person's mood. like kicking him in the a$$ wont be enough and sending him to pluto would make up for all the times he annoyed you. ^__^;;
@jumpinjack00 (3054)
• United States
16 Jul 07
I understand your plight. We have to often
smile despite our inner feelings. I will also
smile because I know that gets me a lot further
than giving off negative energy.
Quite often people can still tell if something
is bothering me inside. Especially those who know
me best. It all depends upon the environment and
those I'm around.
Those I'm closest to I don't hide my emotions but
I don't pour them out either so they are effected
by my mood.
We have to do what we have to do. Especially the
more involved we are with the professional community.
‹(°¿°)›
1 person likes this
@jumpinjack00 (3054)
• United States
17 Jul 07
Yeah it's best to keep some things hidden
from mom. Hence the saying. "Mom is always
last to know." We try and shelter our mom's
especially.
Don't worry about the way you feel about what
you have to do to get by in the working world.
You've already got it figured out thusly beat.
You already know the behavior at work isn't
the way it should be. The office politics the
sucking up, etc...
That's what separates you from the pretentious
and hypocritical people. These people don't see
anything wrong with the falsehoods that are carried
out daily.
I make sure my friends (not business associates)
are as I call it. "What you see is what you get
friends."
‹(°¿°)›
1 person likes this
@secretbear (19448)
• Philippines
18 Jul 07
i just hate the days when i have to be nice and polite when inside i feel grumpy. y'know. ^__^;; most of the times its okay for me if i have to put up a face. i just hate being forced to do something. ^__^
yeah. thank goodness God invented friends with whom we can be our true selves. ^__^
@secretbear (19448)
• Philippines
17 Jul 07
u-huh. it all depends on who's around us at the moment. i dont hide my emotions too with my bestfriends or close friends, but sometimes i do. there's just a lot of things i keep only to myself. ^__^ even to my mother. especially to my mother! LOL
sometimes i think im being pretentious or hypocrite in this professional world im into. coz you know, i have to smile and say good things even though inside, i feel like snobbing them all off. ^__^;; and it bothers me coz i know im being negative and its bad coz i should be positive at all times. i sometimes think im not "me" anymore and i dont know if i should feel bad about it or just let it be since it only happens here at work, like 5 days in a week, from 8 to 5. ^__^;; and i just feel so relaxed and at peace at home coz i can just be me. ^__^
@Nardz13 (5055)
• New Zealand
16 Jul 07
Hi there. If you mean smile, like the fella in that pic there, awww I dont know lol... But smile in general sure with a bit of struggle, especially if you dont feel like smiling at that very moment, it is difficult to force a smile when you dont feel like smiling...
@secretbear (19448)
• Philippines
17 Jul 07
really difficult. because its like contradicting your heart, your emotions. but out of something like respect, politeness, avoiding misunderstandings, wanting to be left alone, or any kind of reason, we just have to smile even if we feel the opposite inside.
i dont think i would smile that man in the future. ^__^;; his smile is unique, it would only suit him. LOL
@creative_freak (352)
• Philippines
16 Jul 07
well i have to even if i don't feel like smiling, to show the person that you appreciate small details that he/she has done or has shown to you/me...even if life sometimes is so unfair...
2 people like this
@secretbear (19448)
• Philippines
17 Jul 07
if we truly appreciate someone for what they have done to us, then smiling at them wont be a problem. ^__^ even if you're feeling blue, and that person made you happy and forget your loneliness, smiling wont be difficult. ^__^
@secretbear (19448)
• Philippines
25 Aug 07
no problem. even if your reply was a one-liner, i still loved it. it has a deep meaning to it. ^__^
@josan181237 (1204)
• Philippines
22 Aug 07
yes i still smile even if i don't feel like it. but oftentimes my brother knows when i'm faking it. if i'm forced to smile at someone, my brother would give me the look (like saying "it's that smile again.") hehe. =)
1 person likes this
@secretbear (19448)
• Philippines
29 Aug 07
of course, people close to us would know how we really feel. but sometimes, i can still make any member of my family to believe what i am showing them. ^__^;;
@vampirestonez (1181)
• Pakistan
17 Jul 07
Well I believe in the saying that life is tough and you just have to grin and bear it.
I believe that many people tend to wear a mask (ok, ok I'll admit I'm one of them) to hide their true inner feelings and I believe that does help you out in the social circle, be it family, friends, work mates or anyone else.
I always try my best to never let anyone catch on my mood, specially when I am feeling kinda sadistic and I do realize that if I keep brushing people off then I can expect the same in return and believe me that can get you to feel really guilty and may end up ruining any kind of relationship.
But that does not mean that you do not share your true feeling with the ones that you trust and the ones that you know will hear you out and try to get your mood back right.
A foul mood can apparently create a lot of misunderstandings and ever wondered how many people could be right next to you wearing a mask :)
@secretbear (19448)
• Philippines
27 Jul 07
I believe so too. wearing a mask indeed helps us to get by within our society. its better to wear a fake smile and keep your friends near than wear a snob face and drive everybody away. ^__^
1 person likes this
@fredgame (1260)
• China
29 Aug 07
i think it's best to show that kind of feeling but i've got that different opinion about hiding bad intension behind a smile. it doesn't really make you open enough for others. i think we should sometimes make others to know when they wrong us and make us unhappy. may i know if you force a smile out to someone who hsa terribly hurt you, are you not indirectly telling them to repeat the dose?
ís it then a grin or a smile?
1 person likes this
@secretbear (19448)
• Philippines
30 Aug 07
well those situations i mentioned are not really intended to hurt me. they dont really intended to anger me. its actually on my side that im feeling grumpy and all i see are the bad things even if its not intentionally. ^__^;; so i just smile because the problem is in me and i dont want to cause misunderstandings because of it.
@andrejuly84 (1047)
• Romania
25 Aug 07
yeah,i use to have a smie on my face when talking to someone else even my soul cries or is angry.this is me,i have the power to smile even the things aren't so great to me.don't know if it's only about politeness.Ikeep a smile on my face during all the conversation,either is face to face or through phone
@secretbear (19448)
• Philippines
29 Aug 07
politeness is one thing. nature is another thing. perspective is another. and so on and so forth. ^__^;; we have many things we consider when we deal with people.
@wonderful1 (2075)
• China
22 Aug 07
sometimes i will, and someitmes i don't. it is up to my mood. frankly,i don't judge a person by his/her appearance. so i can talk with a ugly and poor one if i'm in good mood, or i will say nothing to a beautiful and rich one.
1 person likes this
@secretbear (19448)
• Philippines
29 Aug 07
the look of the person doesnt matter i think. its their attitude that matters especially if their behaviour challenges your patience. ^__^
@jonaida (574)
• Philippines
17 Jul 07
There are times that I experience this too, I have to put on a smile even if deep inside I'm hurt and depressed. I have to do this to cover up my feelings because I wouldn't want others to be affected by it and I don't want others to know my true feelings.
@secretbear (19448)
• Philippines
20 Jul 07
u-huh. I'm like that too most of the times. I saw this quote in a shirt that's very suitable for us, it goes, "I chose to be happy because its easy to smile than to explain why I'm sad". I wish I had that shirt. ^__^
@ccdrewchat (159)
• Philippines
29 Aug 07
i share your sentiment dear...yes i also do smile even if it didn't come from the heart...i force a smile on my face for the same reasons you just mentioned. it's hard living in a civilized world. if you want to be appreciated by everyone, it's a must for us to smile because as you said, which is very true and i have already experienced myself, if you don't smile at those people you don't feel like smiling to, you'll end up collecting enemies instead of friends and not only that, you'll risk destroying your good reputation if you don't smile. true, that's life...well, let's just think of it this way, smiling is the best thing to do to keep yourself beautiful.
1 person likes this
@secretbear (19448)
• Philippines
29 Aug 07
hahaha... i know! its a good way to keep myself beautiful. ^__^;; *peace* i just dont worry about my reputation, i also think about my relationship with other people. i dont like to put it on hot water just because im feeling grumpy over something.
@colourful_guy (77)
• India
23 Aug 07
ya
sometimes in life one has to do wat he dont want to do or even dont expects to do, one has to smile on some fuuny things which r nt funny for him.
1 person likes this
@secretbear (19448)
• Philippines
29 Aug 07
you're right. there are really situations when it is necessary to smile. ^__^
@8ctavarium (552)
• Australia
22 Aug 07
I still try to be positive at all times and so yes, I do smile alot. It's natural for me, even if I am not feeling very well. It's also polite and out of respect I guess to appear good and in turn, other people usually feel good too. But if it is a serious matter, than no way, I shouldn't put on act as it will lose the seriousness of the situation at hand.
1 person likes this
@secretbear (19448)
• Philippines
29 Aug 07
that's another point i wanted to make. be always optimistic! be positive on things. looking on the bright side instead of the murky side. ^__^ i prefer that than to twist my face and be a snob. ^__^
@saivenkaat802003 (4823)
• India
21 Aug 07
No i dont smile, eh, when i am perturbed or in agitated mood, May be i will leave the place if possible,and comeback later and, if asked explain to the people concerned about the reason for my anger.
Secondly, by nature i cant hide my feelings and give a falsified expression to others.
1 person likes this
@secretbear (19448)
• Philippines
28 Aug 07
well, going away could be a good way to avoid the situation. but i couldnt really do that everytime right? especially when i have a lot of work to finish and people come and go, talk to me for a while about something and i couldnt really ignore them. and of course, while talking to annoying clients, i couldnt leave them if i feel pissed. it really depends on the situation. ^__^
@senthil2k (1500)
• India
21 Aug 07
Yes. Sometimes I need to keep a smile in my face at many situations where I was not in a happy mood or atleast in a normal mood. Because showing out our feelings sometimes may worsen the situation. In these cases i think Its betters to fake rather than to make the situation worse.
1 person likes this
@secretbear (19448)
• Philippines
28 Aug 07
yeah. i agree. there are really situations when we have to wear fake smiles so as not to worsen things and not create misunderstandings. ^__^ im glad we share the same point.
@secretbear (19448)
• Philippines
29 Aug 07
yeh. smile even if your heart is breaking. smile even if your heart is aching. ^__^;;
@jcj_111776 (3216)
• Philippines
21 Aug 07
Yes, and it really hurts my cheeks.LOL. It's a challenge to smile when you're feeling bad. I did it once in front of my mother-in-law. It was when my husband already agreed that I'll be spending a week at my sister's house with my son. I just wanted a change of scenery. Then when I was ready to go, something came up and my mother-in-law asked me if I can postpone my vacation. I felt so bad that I wanted to cry but I had to smile and say ok to her. When the truth is, I wanted to just lie down and cry my eyes out. That time, I really needed to go. Because I felt as if I need some time out with my husband. To clear my head and my heart.
I thought I was doing the best performance of my life. But my mother-in-law never bought it. She knew how I really felt. That's why no matter how hard we paste a smile on our face, it still shows that we're not really happy at all.
Or maybe it just takes a little experience in doing that...^_^
1 person likes this
@secretbear (19448)
• Philippines
28 Aug 07
awww.. that must have felt really terrible! i would have given you the best performance award. LOL i guess in front of our loved ones we couldnt really hide what we truly feel no matter how hard we try to keep it. but i understand why we have to say the opposite just so a person wont feel bad about us. ^__^;; and yeah, it takes experience, a lot of it actually, before we could paint a smile on our face without a smudge. ^__^;;
@thefortunes (2367)
• Netherlands
22 Aug 07
Hi Secretbear, it really depends, but if in your situation I will smile as well in order not to ruin my relationship with people that I am working together with. This must be really hard at times though, to put a different face on, as it feels like you're placing a plastic mask on your face, just like a joker. It will be better if we could always act as we feel at that moment, but than againm without ruining someone's day
1 person likes this
@secretbear (19448)
• Philippines
29 Aug 07
its really hard. if they were all my friends, then it wouldnt be so hard to act like how i really am and show how i really feel. but most of them are just plain officemates which you have to treat well to promote a harmonious working relationship. so im always careful with my attitude. ^__^
