Mother
By lucy02
@lucy02 (5015)
United States
July 18, 2007 11:09pm CST
I need some advice on what to do with my Mother. She was on meds for bipolar and paranoid schizoid disorder for 20 yrs. She had heart surgery last year and her surgeon took her off her meds. He said he didn't think she needed them anymore since she did so well in the hospital and I guess because these meds have side effects. She did fine until a couple of months ago. She started hearing voices and refuses to take any of her meds (including blood pressure and mild diabetes). She doesn't seem to be hearing voices now but still refuses her meds and doesn't want to go to church or her family reunion this weekend. I could have her committed to a nearby hospital with a geriatric psych ward but I am afraid it would be too traumatic to her. She is 80 y/o. and has had a stroke in the past as well as the other health problems. On the other hand, I am afraid her not taking her meds will have serious consequences, although BP is not bad most nights and her blood sugar has been fine. What would you do if you were me?
3 people like this
8 responses
@xkristalx (230)
• United States
19 Jul 07
Do you have the money to hire someone to help you care for her?
3 people like this
@lucy02 (5015)
• United States
19 Jul 07
We are just considering the geriatric/psych unit of the hospital because they can get her back on her meds. It usually doesn't take but a week or two. Once she gets back on the psychiatric meds she should take all her meds like she is suppose to.
1 person likes this
@tuffy999 (794)
• Philippines
19 Jul 07
be patient. talk to her in your most charming way. and tell her very slowly and nicely that if she does not take her medicine you will bring her to the hospital. don't rush her in due time she will listen to you and she'll take her medicine. or maybe bribe her, tell her if she drinks her med you'll bring her to the mall etc. old people are like little kids. they need all the affection and attention.
3 people like this
@Dolcerina (3376)
• Hungary
19 Jul 07
Hi Lucy,
I would not take her to the hospital, if she does not want to go. I think she refuses it too. I would regret her decision. I suppose the best you can do, is to be with her. If you have time for her. Yes, it must be very sad for you, that you can not help more. I am sorry.
@carissa765 (1097)
• United States
19 Jul 07
I work in the health care field and take care of mentally and physically handicapped individuals. In the most recent year of my job, I have worked mainly with the elderly. Have you looked into puting her into a assisted livign facility? They are really a help for the individual as well as the family. You have to be careful, some of these places will try to take advantage of your mother and the family, but if you find a place make sure to check them with the bbb and other agencies to make sure that they are a credible facility. Hope everything works out for you and your family. Best wishes and best of luck.
3 people like this
@lucy02 (5015)
• United States
19 Jul 07
Thank you for the response. mom really doesn't need assisted living. She lives with us and she gets around well. We only are considering the hospital to get her back on her meds. She would only need to be there a week or two at most. Once she is on her psychiatric meds she will take all her meds the way she is suppose to...at least she has in the past.
1 person likes this
@lucy02 (5015)
• United States
23 Jul 07
Well Kelly, I spoke too soon. She seems to be worse tonight. She is outside in the car and won't get out. It's midnight and she said she may stay out there all night long. I think she's mad because I was going to the store without her while ago. It was late and I was hoping she would go to bed so I was going to leave her here with my husband while I picked up something at the store. I needed a few minutes alone too. She ran and got in the car. I went to the store and came back and she's been sitting in the car for the last 2 hours.
1 person likes this
@lucy02 (5015)
• United States
20 Jul 07
Thanks Kelly. I was leaning toward this too as long as her mental situation doesn't get worse. She's not dangerous at the moment. When she was younger, she was, until she got on the meds. I'm not sure the psych meds are not just as bad on her heart though as her not taking the other meds.
1 person likes this
@kelly60 (4547)
• United States
23 Jul 07
That is the main thing that I would be watching for. I have a friend who is bipolar and goes off of her medications from time to time. Some people don't get too out of hand when they do this, but she has terrible swings, so when it happens, and we can't get her back on them, we really have to watch her. As long as your mom isn't a danger to herself or to those around her though, forcing her to either take the medications or to go into the hospital could just make matters worse. I hope that things get better.
2 people like this
@beauty_ph (2749)
• Philippines
31 Jul 07
I think I will keep on asking her to take those meds. Because I know it can do her better. Or I can bring her back to her old doctor for a check-up. Then maybe have those meds back again too. I do admire you for taking care of your mothers my friend. God bless!
@puput_251 (128)
• Indonesia
1 Aug 07
hi lucy .... my name is puput
I am sad read your story.. I only can say... "in our life we don't do any thing, but we can try and pray... because we can't twisting fact"
I can't give my oppinion i just give suggestion Ok.
Because I isn't you
@puput_251 (128)
• Indonesia
3 Aug 07
thanks your..answer lucky....i will give you spirit...don't be try....OK
