is there having the same problem with me?

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I am consumed by an psychological diease which called self-forced sympton,it is very hard to overcome because I have been forcing myself for a lomg time since I started my high school. Now it has graduatelly been an even terrible diease that as soon as I meet my acquaitants or friends I will have an anger or sometimes even fury in my heart which come out spontaneously and cann t be controled.And this anger has revealed on my face very obviously,sometimes my friends feel this anger that he will regard this as a feeling of hostility.And I know the more I wanna cover my anger ,the more obvious it will be.but if I let it be,maybe I will lose all my friends for my friends will misundstand me.and this even affect my job hunting for I always be in anger in the interview.In general,I feel hostility towards those person who is colse with me but have the opposite desire in my mind,and this feeling is spbtaneous. so I am looking forward to your help,and maybe some suggestions will help,too.Thank you very much!