Long lost love & learning things.
By gmakesmoney
@gmakesmoney (2923)
United States
July 30, 2007 11:43pm CST
So I just got off the phone with someone I haven't spoken to in a very long time and I have to admit I'm practically giddy! It makes me think about so much in life and how everything really is for a reason and closed doors often mean new ones open.
It also gave me an answer to an age old question of: can you love two people at the same time? The answer is no. You can care about someone deeply and think you are in love with two people but when it comes down to it, there's only one person that makes you feel like you've got butterflies in your tummy and like your heart wants to leap out of your chest. And when you think about these two people if someone asks you to choose and you say "but I don't want to hurt [name here]" then that is the person you need to let go of because right there you've made it all clear. That isn't the person you see yourself with, isn't the person you yearn for so staying would only hurt more than leaving ever could. That makes a lot of things clear for me.
I don't know what the future holds but I hope it includes this automatic texas sized smile and lots of laugher, how I'd missed the laughter.
1 person likes this
4 responses
@Feona1962 (7526)
• United States
31 Jul 07
I am so happy for you. I hope all works out for you. You deserve the best..
@gmakesmoney (2923)
• United States
31 Jul 07
AWW thanks! There's no telling where it will go and we're about 1,000 miles apart but it's funny how even after months you can pick up a converstaion with someone like not a day has gone by. And the laughter was sooooo good for my soul, I missed it. That was the one thing I always wished my relationship with the non-caller (lol) would have but it never did. If nothing else at lease I have one of my best friends back.
1 person likes this
@Feona1962 (7526)
• United States
31 Jul 07
If it is meant to be, it will happen. Everything happens for a reason...I wish you all the best...I am so glad he made you laugh...
@gmakesmoney (2923)
• United States
31 Jul 07
Thanks! Me too, I needed that laugh. We have the same odd ball humor and he actually understands what I'm talking about when I say things like thinggy with the stuff. It was nice to have a real conversation with someone who got me.
1 person likes this
@bellaofchaos (11538)
• United States
31 Jul 07
I'm so happy for you. It's been a while ok a long while since I felt that. I hope that you grab onto it with all you heart and never let it go... Because right now I wish I had the courage to go after what I want.
@gmakesmoney (2923)
• United States
31 Jul 07
Thank you! I didn't have the courage either, in fact I had decided I would forget every moment and memory and try and be happy with the other person I was with despite what my heart told me. And just like that, the other relationship fell apart and so did the relationship of the one I'm talking about with his other. We hadn't spoken in months, didn't know about each other being in other relationships. And just like that life changes and I get a call. It was in no ways about "us" but I think getting that friendship back is the start. My point being that if something is meant to be, no matter what else you try to do to hide that face, it will always surface and it's up to you to take a step foward and claim it or loose it. It doesn't have to be some big gesture, baby steps work just fine. In fact, I've learned out of all of this (a lesson 7 years in the making) that baby steps are best.
@bellaofchaos (11538)
• United States
31 Jul 07
well good luck with the baby steps and I know how you feel..
@foxyfire33 (10005)
• United States
31 Jul 07
You've just made me smile and cry at the same time. Thank you!
I won't go into all the reasons why, but I needed to hear that. It reminded me of things I think I had forgotten. I hope everything works out the way it should for you. Best of luck!
@gmakesmoney (2923)
• United States
31 Jul 07
Thanks. Sometimes love can be kinda complex I think but I have all the faith in the world that it always finds it's way. Sometimes it takes giving up, like I had, for it to pop out of nowhere and say "oh no you don't". It's premature for me to think perhaps of a happily ever after and still way too complex but my little big heart is wishing anyway, lol. I hope it works for you also.
