Tired of tring to make it work!

I could be very wrong here but I am guessing that your mom maybe feels a tremendous amount of guilt when it comes to you. Something was going on in her life that caused her to be unable to be the parent she should have been for you and maybe wished she could have been. I am willing to bet that you both are carrying a huge amount of hurt. I would write her a letter and spill my heart out to her. Maybe she feels unworthy of your love. I really don't know. I am a mother and I know that if someone else raised my child my guilt would be so great that I mite find it hard to face this child. I would love her and wish I had been a better parent. I don't know as i'd be able to step outside of myself and realize that I did the best thing at the time by giving her up for adoption. Your mother is your mother and she gave you up out of love..obviously. You need to tell her how you feel.

hey. can i share my story with you? i have loved my family very much and would give my life for them. lately i lost my job and have been home for like 2 yearsand things changed so much though i am still the same person who had sent every thing i earned when iwas abroad, recently i have been told not to eat at home , that too by my mom, my 10 year younger sister calls me a failure, my brother who has a great job by the grace of god almighty treats me like a shab and so on, when ever any one leaves my room they make it a point to bang the door real hard to let me know how unwanted i am and i am told day in and day out how worthless i am in words and their gestures, but you know what? my source of sustainance is my god who knows everything and has a perfect plan for my best, lately i have started realising that really god does love me because with all that i have gone through, the time has gane but i have become such a stronger and understanding persn that people have started liking me more outside. so dont worry whatever happens happens for our very best, you never know maybe there is something great hidden in your children not being clse to their grandma, you never kno, the working of god is so amazing that we say wow when the real time comes. pray, smile and wait. my prayers for yoor very best.

This had happened to so many of my friends. They do not get along with their moms because they have had a lot of issues with them, they have done what they could to make things work out between them, but in the end, they just all went their separate ways.

Hello, my dear friend, I think that you already know the answer to that question...you can not force the relationship...she has to want to be part of your life for things to work out between you two....and it dos not sound like that is a priority to her.... I can not even imagine what that must be like for you...and I can understand hurt feelings...she does not deserve a daughter like you... Maybe, she sees you as one of life's failures and does not know how to rectify it....maybe she is just self absorbed and could care less...either way...SHE is the one who is missing out... You are a wonderful, warm, compassionate person with deep love for your family...you are an excellet mother and I truly believe that one day your mother will face her judgement day for the way that she has mistreated you... I love you dearly, my friend....

Well I fell very bad for you, It is the least your mom could have done was to stop in to see you while she was in town. It does not sound like she spent much time with any of your sisters. It sounds to me like your mom has a big problem, it is a shame that she can not make time for you. Some day when it is too late she will be very sorry about that. I do not thinkk there is anything else you can do to have a better relationship with your mom, it is something she is going to want to do.All you can do is pray that she will come to her sences before it is too late.. I am glad that you had loving Great grandparentents that adopted you and raised you as their own.God Bless.

I really feel sorry for you. I cant understand any mother not wanting to spend time with her children no matter how old they are. My feeling on this is cut ties with your mother. Look at how she has made you feel. You dont want your daughter to feel the same. If she started to get close to her grandmother then she stops seeing her it would be horrible. You still have family that loves and wants you. Just remember the responsability for all this in on your mothers side not yours.

Hi, i can understand your situation and problem and sympathize with you, all i can suggest is that though you know shes your mother and of course you do expect things from her after so many years, and i guess what you are wanting from her, youre not getting, so why not let it pass. I mean that if you feel that you have tried and you are tired out, just let it be, there is no point fretting and fuming and feling bad, maybe thats what your mother is also wanting to be able to meet you as per her own timings and convience and you are expecting more, after allshes your mother, but maybe so many years have passed by, i guess just think that if she meets its ok and even if she doesnt dont feel too bad, take it as an open relationship kind of thing. Life is too short to think over these things and take themt o heart and fel bad, i know cant be helped at times, but life has to move on.