GOING STEADY but GOING NOWHERE! :(

i think you should confront your boyfriend with you problem to get his views on the matter, because as much as we can give you advice we cant physically help you as we dont fully understand the strain and other matters which need putting into consideration when talking about something as sensitive as relationships

5 years and no plans? that is a long time to be dating. ask him and if he does not commit, time to get someone who can. just my opinion.

It sounds as if you fell into a routine and maybe a comfort zone. Five years is a long time to be together and maybe you're just comfortable. This can be a good thing because you probably know each other really well. But a relationship needs spice! I've been with my husband for ten years, married for seven. We still go out, try new bars and restaurants, go away for the weekend, and go on vacation together all the time. Why not just plan something different to do together? A new bar? A concert? Take a cooking class?

aww..that's sad. have u tried talking to your bf about it? maybe he does have plans to take your relationship to the next level, but isn't quite ready yet. maybe due to work commitments or things like that. try to spend more time together and talk about other things, not work! talking about work only makes both of you more stress out hehe..try to find out what he wants from the relationship and let him know how you feel. hope you guys will be able to work something out. take care:)

It depends on what you really want? And also how old you are. Are you living together? If so, and if adult enough, why don't you tie the knot? Have you considered discussing it with your boyfriend? There are a lot of things you need to ask yourself/ I think you've moved into a comfort zone and the status quo suits you. If you are that comfortable with each other, getting married is not such a bad idea. And what about kids? Five years is a long time and men like nothing better than having all the privileges of togetherness without the commitment. I think since you are considering it, bring it up with your boyfriend, See what he has to say. All the best!

I think that is really the hardest part in a relationship. My former boyfriend and I stayed for 2 years but we had the same problem as yours. When the time arrived that I cannot take it anymore, I broke up with him. Because I don't think either of us is still happy with what we have. Why not try to be both away from work for even just 3 days. Just the two of you alone together to rekindle the time and make up for the lost ones. Spend times in the movies or in the beach. That would I think would help ignite the flame again.

My husband and I where together for 8 years before we got married. So many times I though we would never move forward. If you love each other and you have fun together. You say everything is smooth sailing so I would have to say it is unimportant you try and spice stuff up. Perhaps talk about your feelings and see what he is thinking. Communication is the only way to make things better.

I really think the best thing you could do is talk to your boyfriend about everything you have just outlined. You need to make sure you are both on the same page but if you are really in love with him and things have worked for this long you shouldn't give him an ultimatum. Or perhaps you could tell him where you want the relationship to go and see if he wants the same things. Good luck, i really hope you can work it out.

If marriage is an important goal in your life and you think that in 10, 15 or 20 years you'll regret not getting married, then its time to have the talk. 5 years! I mean, it sounds like you don't want to rock the boat because you don't want to lose him, but if you wait any longer you risk losing you. Also please don't try to have kids without the benefit of the marriage license. You wouldn't believe the nightmare you are guaranteed in that scenario.

You are not alone, we're on the same boat! :( .. But u know what my friend, last month when i got to see my boyfriend. I didnt pass the chance of talking to him regarding everything, our future, his plans for us all those things. I made the first move cause i dont wanna leave again if everything is still hanging in terms of our relationship. Finally, i was able to get what i really wanted. I guess, you have to make the first move. He's your boyfriend anyway. Dont feel ashamed asking him that thing, wedding to be exact. I'm telling u .. its like this weight on my shoulders i've been carrying for so long was finally gone. Goodluck and cheers. (",)

That's probably the third worst thing to happen in a relationship (second one is cheating, and the first one being breakup) - you fell into a routine. But don't get discouraged, because it is easiest to solve, and the solution is - doing new things. Try to go somewhere new, see a movie, theater play, concert, dinner, vacation, go camping, bungee jumping, food fighting, whatever...as you can see, there are plenty of options (actually endless options if you count the bizarre ones in), but as long as you are having FUN together and bringing a new flavor to a relationship - they are the best options too. Small signs of attention or doing something special for your partner also bring the spark back. I know that you both are probably busy with work, but when you both finally get to be free - don't let it go to waste. You don't even have to talk about ''something'' to fill the time (like work), you can look each other in the eyes and feel the magical connection that you've been building for 5 years, the process of accepting your differences, and all that you've been through. I hope that these tips will help you and I wish you all the best in your relationship.

As you're now one, you shouldn't wait for him alone to bring up suggestions of how you should do, you know a man is not a monopoly of knowledge or every idea. you're part of him now and if the other part doesn't the other should finish it up. i think if you waited for him to bring up that idea and he didn't, you could so that you put heads together and you'll have a better if not a perfect plans for yourselves. any way this is my view. good luck.

Maybe you should instead of talking about work,talk to him about taking your relationship a step further. It sounds as if you have a basically great relationship but have just gotten into a rut.you are smart to recognize that early on and do something about it. Even after you are married,you have to both work to keep things alive. good luck!