Would you disown your child?

@bhappy2 (327)
Australia
August 15, 2007 10:25pm CST
Is there anything your child could do that would make you disown him/her? I have friends who don't even speak to their adult children because of something they said or did and I don't understand how anyone could do this. Could you? How much could you take from your child and not stop loving them?
2 people like this
12 responses
@jennifer611 (2514)
• United States
16 Aug 07
Hi, I could never disown my children, not for anything in the world. They mean the world to me. decisions they make I may not agree with but they are still my children. when I was younger I did so much dirt, my mother could have easily disowned me, but she didn't. I think that's what helped. everyone else put conditions on their love, but she didn't.. she was the only one to stick by me. if she had not, I probably would have never straightened up my act.
1 person likes this
• United States
16 Aug 07
I don't think there is anything that my child could do to my me disown him. He is my life. I created him and I will never turn my back on him. I think that when a person is at there LOWEST is when they need you the most. I can't say that I will be proud of everything that my child does or that I will condone his wrongful actions but I will always be there for him if he needs me. I just hope that I raise him well enough so that I am never forced to have to make a decision like this.
1 person likes this
• India
16 Aug 07
Well my son is too young for me to speculate on this. But I guess, if he ever did anything against humanity or something that has grievously hurt somebody and is against my conscience, I would definitely talk with him on it. During that discussion, if I feel that he thinks me as an interfering old hag or would like me to condone his act or would like me to seek pardon from the victims (instead of himself owning up), I may stop communicating with him for sometime. Even after that if he doesn’t change or I feel that he is so much gone that his mother’s feelings have no importance for him, I would definitely leave him to his fate. I can never stop loving him, he would always be my baby, but I would not condone his actions either. But more than him, I would blame myself for not stopping him at the initial moment, for not holding his hand and leading him away…I would ask myself where did I go wrong? (suddenly I am feeling very depressed).
1 person likes this
@Ravenladyj (22902)
• United States
16 Aug 07
I couldnt see myself ever disowning my kids....but i also couldnt picture them doing something so horrid that it would even enter my mind ya know...My mother however tried to actually legally disown me (emancipation) when I was 13 but they found out that they'd still have to pay for me until I was 18 so they didnt bother...but if it'd not been for the fact that they still had to pay my way, they'd have done it.....and she admits to it :-/ go fig... I cant understand how a parent could be like that either but I guess it really does take all sorts to make the world go round ya know :-/
1 person likes this
@horsesrule (1957)
• United States
16 Aug 07
There is absolutely nothing that would make me disown my only child. I have just one child, an adult daughter [and she has three small sons]. She can say or do whatever she wants, I don't care. All I have to do is love her no matter what. That's what parents do. Do I like everything she says or the choices she makes? NO! But its her life and none of my business. I don't understand how any parents can have conditional love for their child. Though my parents have done that with me and my brother. I just don't understand never talking to your children ever again. And then dying without having a relationship with them or talking to them? That's just so sad.
1 person likes this
• United States
16 Aug 07
I have six kids, and I am not at all happy with some of the things they do. And setting hear reading your question I asked my self what could a child of mine do to make me want to disown them. I could not think of anything that I would not stand by my kids when they are going though threr lives. And if they did some thing to get inn trounle it seems like its my job to stand with them. And help them with what they did. Being a mom or dad is hard work, and does not go how you think it will alot of time. So I do not think I could are would ever disown my kids.
1 person likes this
@limcyjain (3516)
• India
16 Aug 07
Actually no parent would like to disown their children after all it wont be easy for a woman to disown a child whom she has nurished for nine months in her womb. But sometimes circumstances are such that the children move on the wrong path and are no longer in control of their parents. Its only then that they go for such actions.
@TiffanieC (827)
• United States
17 Aug 07
I have had this happen to me by my father and actually seems to be a common theme in my family. I don't plan to continue that tradition. I have to say though that if a child of mine turned out to be (which I could never imagine) a child molester or seriel killer or something like that.. then yes.. not only would I disown my child but I would turn my child in!
• Canada
17 Aug 07
I would turn my child in if s/he did anyting violent and illegal. It would be for their own good. But disowning a child is in the parents best interest, not the child's.
• United States
17 Aug 07
Well, in the cases above that I mentioned.. then the child would also most likely be a sociopath in which there is nothing you can do as a parent to help at that point and the dynamic of that relationship could be very dangerous.
@babykay (2131)
• Ireland
16 Aug 07
I cannot ever imagine disowning my child to be honest. But that is because he is just one year old! But I can imagine in the future if something really terrible happened like he killed someone I might think about it. But he will always be my son and I will always love him so the answer is no. I too know people who have family feuds over seemingly trivial things. I think most of these are a cover for a more serious issue.
@Nardz13 (5055)
• New Zealand
17 Aug 07
Hi. No I couldnt dis-own my children for any amount of troubled situation, they may have got themselves into or for other people, for that matter... I would however get them to hand themselves in and admit to there wrongs if any... But our children are only young and theres no signs of that ever happening to them... I would never dis-own a chidlren of mine...
@butterfly39 (3904)
• Philippines
16 Aug 07
I can't do it...but if my child did something wrong he/she might face a punishment but not to disown him/her...
1 person likes this
@Nanette99 (219)
• Canada
16 Aug 07
My father disowned me. It wasn't for anything important but we haven't spoken in years. It was mostly because I decided to go to school in America instead of Canada.