unreliable fathers
By tdl617
@tdl617 (34)
United States
August 17, 2007 10:56pm CST
I know there are many woman who have children by unreliable men. I am one of them, but I choose to stay with him despite the advice of my family. Lets call him "Bob". Bob and I have two kids, very close together when we were very young. We were both still in school when I got pregnant with the first. I graduated and he dropped out. The oldest is now three. Bob has had three jobs in that time and is currently unemployed. We each still live at home with our parents because we cant afford a place of our own. I cant work because I have no sitter for the kids. My dad buys the kids the clothes and diapers and they kid things that they need, Bob gives any money he gets to his parents. They spend it on beer and motorcycle payments. Bobs dad just bought a brand new Harley, brand spankin new. After the first of the month these people live on bologna and tea. I have a very big problem with Bobs family and the fact that he chooses them over his kids all the time. I know other people are in similar situations and I would like to hear about them.
2 responses
@Malyck (3425)
• Australia
18 Aug 07
It sounds like you're in a really bad position.
I'm sure that you have already spoken to your husband many times, but you really should tell him that he can't just give his money to his parents like that.
Obviously his folks need to sort themselves out, but he has no right not to put at least a portion of the money he earns towards yourself and your children.
I think if this continues, you should make him live with his own parents (as I understand it, the two of you live together with your parents?), and you should get him to pay some sort of child support.
I know this would be hard because of emotional attachment, but if he is not there for you or the children, it's really not worth it.
Good luck,
Malyck.
1 person likes this
@tdl617 (34)
• United States
18 Aug 07
I have spoken to him alot about it. He's just my fiancee right now, I told him we werent getting married until we got our own home. He mostly lives with his parents and Im mostly with mine. We take turns staying at eachothers homes a few nights a week. I think its better for the kids that way. Ive thought about leaving him many times. We've been through alot together. He was physically abused as a kid an on through his teenage years, he had back surgery at 19 yrs old, Ive felt like his only escape from his family, if I left him I would feel like abandoned him and sent him back to the dogs (his family)
@mrsbrian (1949)
• United States
19 Aug 07
I understand your delima and I dont , why are you not working,single parents can get help paying a sitter so you could be helping your children that way. Is there a reason why your boyfriend dosnt hold a job,if you think this is good for your kids it isnt.maby you should think more about the kids more than your b/fs feelings.
